March 23, 2017
Written by 7 Cups Therapist, Luma Naccache
As human beings, we are all unique and different than each other. However, we are, at the same time, very similar and we experience the same emotions and go through the same internal conflicts as one another. Sometimes, what is happening inside of us can begin to show in several aspects of our lives and cause major disturbances. These are some of the signs you should be watching out for:
1. You get the feeling that there’s an aspect of your life that keeps on repeating itself even if some of its minor features are slightly different. This can apply to any personal or social facet of your life; something that you begin to feel is almost like a trend for you: relationships with a certain type of person that tend to develop (and end) in a familiar way, jobs or projects that eventually don’t work out for almost the same reason every time, or any kind of “failure” that you could swear keeps happening to you. This usually means that you’re playing a major role in the negative outcome of these events, possibly without realizing it. Seeking professional help can make you aware of your own impact and give you the awareness you’ve been missing in order to stop the repetition.
2. You’re experiencing drastic changes in your mood, behavior, thoughts or interests. This could’ve happened slowly over time or unexpectedly out-of-the-blue, but in both cases, it feels like something has caused you to no longer act, think, or feel the way you usually do. Keeping in mind that change is a normal part of everyone’s life, the particular shifts I’m referring to actually feel out of character and tend to have a negative undertone to them. It could be that you’ve suddenly started to hate an activity that you loved, or began to eat or sleep a lot more than you used to, or even feel an extreme sense of cheerfulness for no particular reason. Most of the time, people around you are the ones who point out these changes. This might indicate that you’re dealing with some sort of internal distress but you’re starting to get emotionally tired of trying to stay on top of it. Changes in behavior are a sign that you need to be engaging in self-exploration and finding out the real root of the problem.
3. You have a sense of constant worry or fear that is impossible to shake off, no matter where you are physically or who are the people around you. This feeling might be stronger at certain times and get a little less intense when you’re distracted, entertained or busy but somehow it feels like it’s always lurking somewhere in the background. This might indicate that you’re suffering as a result of a stressful or traumatic experience that you’ve had recently or even some years ago. This feeling might be a sign that you haven’t worked through some emotional issues and they have lingered on after the fact. Talking about your experiences and expressing how you feel to a professional can make your nervousness a lot more manageable.
4. You’ve become convinced of a new lifestyle or belief system, one that you didn’t have before, and it has caused you to slowly push away people who were important to you, such as friends and family. You feel like they can no longer “get you” or understand the way you see things, which has made you shut them out and isolate yourself or only associate with people who think and behave exactly the way you do. Although you’re free to have your own perspective and value system, an over-attachment to a component of your life that causes serious distance with your surroundings and forces you to change your social habits might be doing you more harm than good in the long run. This might be very difficult to be aware of or admit, although, odds are that your friends and family have been talking to you or even fighting with you about it. Seek some help in order to find out if your adherence to this new-found hobby or interest or belief is helping you stay balanced by making constructive choices for yourself or is it hiding an attempt to run away from a problem that needs to be confronted or dealt with in your life.
If any of these signs are applicable to you, or to someone you know, speak to a therapist about them now. Everyone deserves some help in order to understand themselves well, resolve their personal conflicts and see themselves clearly.