Looking for a listener - long-term preferred

Hi, my name is Caitríona.

I'm looking for someone I can speak to on a regular, preferably long-term basis about my struggling with grief (my spouse died) and surrounding issues (depression, anxiety, isolation, some passive suicidal ideation, etc.)
Things I'm quite sensitive to are being told to calm down/look at the positives in my life, whether or not I've considered therapy and what my partner may have wanted were he alive. Unfortunately I've received much of that so far on this site so I figured this might be a more positive way of looking for someone I can click with a little bit.

Someone smart, nonjudgmental and empathetic would be an ideal candidate. Developing a bit of a bond would be great as well since I'm not always the best at putting what I feel in words and a certain comfort level helps with that.

A bit about me. I'm in my early 30s so someone of similar age or older would be excellent. I live in bonnie Scotland (and do use Gaelic expressions quite a lot but I'm always happy to translate if the need arises) and work from home, which means that as far as scheduling goes, I'd prefer GMT mornings and/or afternoons, sometimes evenings. Whatever works best really.

Thanks in advance.