Multiple types of grief hit me hard over the weekend
Over the weekend, I had dealt with a lot of bottled up emotions and tried to keep in check. It was when I attempted to volunteer at an event with some really rude people that these bottled up emotions just exploded. It happened when I was trying to take a break in the kitchen and our team lead was being very rude and controlling. I ended reaching a breaking point and threw my unopened bottle of sports drink on the floor and shouted "Leave me alone!" at her. Though someone asked if I was ok, I firmly said no and went somewhere private to cry.
1. This past weekend was father's day and I was left out of my dad's funeral
2. Then I have been grieving over a lot of other disappointments like driving a car, having trouble making friends, being accepted, and lots of other types of loss.
@Summershy
Oh my, this is terrible what your going through.. it seems like you are at a breaking point and you need something good to happen in your life someday soon.
I hope things pick up for you. So sad that this is going on..🌲
@AsherTree
Hi Asher:
Part of the problem is that the entire situation was just poorly run all the way around. For one thing, the girl who was bossing me around was not the best communicator. Then the organizer changed the time at the last night, which was the day before.
That is the downside of bottled up emotions. We would reach a breaking point when triggered, and explode. It is good to hear that you were able to have a good cry though, letting those emotions out through tears is a way of releasing those bottled emotions. You have a lot going on in your life, grieving over so many things, give yourself time to process each thing, and allow yourself to feel the emotions, have a good cry if you can.
@Summershy
@Jaeteuk
Actually, the real downside is that one person came to check up on me while the rest were just cold.
I think there are many people out there who doesn't know how to react to others who are grieving, so they would rather not get involved or show they care or notice you. So, for those who actually check on us, are the ones that either have gone through similar situations and can empathize with you. Those are rare, but it can happen.
@Summershy
@Jaeteuk Actually, the other people did not know that I was greiving. All they saw was someone have an aggressive trantrum and since none of them asked....well.
Our grief, we share them with those who notice and show they care. Otherwise, people who have no clue what grief is, will only make us feel worse. Choose your people wisely, even if it's just one or two that you can share with. We need to be able to sit with our emotions, accept it. Acting out aggressively will only mislead how others see us.
@Summershy
@Jaeteuk
I felt awkward and humilated by those people and that situation anyway.