I don't know what to do (Title edited)
This is very messy.
I dated W for 4 years and we've been friends for 6. He knows me inside out and the bond we have is irreplaceable. I love him to bits and I know he's madly in love with me but we can't be together due to the distance. We've been doing LDR for around 2 years and it doesn't look like either of us are ever going to be in the same city or even the same country. So the only option is to breakup instead of holding on to fleeting hope. Now I love him but I don't think I'm sexually attracted to him anymore but the bond we hold. I know I will never have a bond like that ever again.
Now I know E from college. We've been in uni for 3 years and we were pretty much like acquaintances but a couple of months ago we hit it off like totally and we want to be together and all that. I don't have the bond with him the way I have it with W but he gives me stability and gives me rational solutions and grounds me which I love. I am sexually attracted to him but it's not as satisfying as W.
So in all I'm involved with 2 people, W and E.
Now E gave me an ultimatum to choose between either him or W and by that he means to cut one out completely and I don't know what to do. I love them both. They both give me different things. W has my heart and I don't want to throw away all the history we have and neither do I want the bond we have to break but him and I can't be together because of the distance and our career paths are polar opposites. E is relatively new and I want him in my life and I know that if we give it a shot we can have a future together but there will be long distance there too though the odds of us staying in the same city are very high and we have similar career paths.
W and E hate each other. Like actually despise each other so both of them coming to an agreement won't work. E knows that I'll never love anyone the way I've loved W and W knows that too. E said that both of them can't coexist in my life. I don't know what to do. I know this is a very shitty situation and I'm torn. I have 3 options:
1. Choose W and keep my history and bond but let go of E who I can have an amazing future with.
2. Choose E and work on our relationship but pretty much lose the only person I've ever loved so deeply.
3. Choose neither and throw everything I have away.
I really don't know what to do. Please help me out.
@WinnieGiraffe
Sounds quite a tough decision you have to make. But life is about options. We constantly have to make decisions, and sometimes it's a tough one.
Would you be contented to have W in your life without having him with you in person?
If W has the same opportunity to have someone he's sexually attracted with, there with him, what would he choose?
If W has the same opportunity, what would you do?
If you choose E and things don't work as expected, will you regret choosing him?
If you haven't tried it, you may want to try to hear others' thoughts on Support Room here
Best wishes, Winnie 🤍