Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav

Should I tell my partner or friend I am a recovering addict?

24 Answers
Last Updated: 09/07/2021 at 6:34pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
Moderated by

Maria Wasielewski, Master of Arts in Counseling and Guidance, University of Arizona

Licensed Professional Counselor

I am inspired when working with clients, who are facing challenging life experiences, to be able to help them to develop the needed skills to live their best possible life!

Top Rated Answers
November 4th, 2014 3:13pm
Every situation is unique, and I can only share my personal experience. That said, I am pretty open about the fact that I am a recovering alcoholic and drug addict. I don't think it's anything to be ashamed of, and I would rather people in my life know this fundamental thing about me. (It also avoids potentially awkward situations like someone offering me a drink.) People who would take issue with me doing the right thing and treating my disease of addiction are not the sort of folks I wish to be around today.
January 2nd, 2015 4:41pm
If you feel that you should, just make sure that its at the appropriate time. Recovery is something to be proud of and should not be "shelved" as something to hide, its an accomplishment, a sigh of strength and not weakness.
October 3rd, 2014 9:51pm
Being honest will take a huge weight of off your shoulders. You will feel better after this. You won't have the feeling that you keep something hidden.
October 31st, 2014 1:40pm
Do whatever feels right for you at the moment just know that your past addiction does not define you.
November 8th, 2014 1:16pm
Yes, most definitely. It is always good to admit you're a recovering addict. If you can admit it, then you are definitely going down the right path. Never be ashamed. You recovered for a reason, and that is a huge change. Never be afraid to admit your biggest problems.
November 7th, 2014 6:56pm
Being honest about your addiction can make some situations less difficult to you, you could explain your triggers and create a more safe environment. nonetheless if you don't feel comfortable talking about it know that how much of yourself you decide to share it's only up to you!
November 10th, 2014 11:49pm
Sometimes, honesty is really the best policy. No one can help you recover unless they know your struggles.
November 11th, 2014 10:23pm
It'd be best to be honest from the beginning as it won't confuse things later on. Either way it is more than likely to come out and if you keep it locked up it'll effect you in a very negative way.
November 14th, 2014 9:45am
I think you should be open with your partner and friends about it....otherwise they may tempt you and not even mean to.
December 24th, 2014 6:39pm
I think being honest in any relationship is the most core building block to having a trusting relationship. Secrets can hardly stay secret for long.
December 24th, 2014 6:41pm
this is totally your own choice.. but.. If your partner is your soul mate etc it may be they can give vital support to you if you need it , I know first hand that it was probably the best this thing i did though that is just me. Trusting somebody is very much a vital part of recovering and can help you trust yourself in making descisions later in life down the road
April 16th, 2015 2:13am
Yes you should always let someone know whom you are involved with you are a recovering addict. They need to know so they don't put you in situations that you could be triggers for you. That's being responsible for you own sobriety and staying accountable.
August 10th, 2015 4:10am
Of course. You don't want to hide something very important to those guys right? I mean, you trust them and it's part of your relationship that no secrets are to be made.
October 26th, 2015 2:49am
Well usually it might be best to. Keeping a secret like that with your friend or partner might lead to a bigger problem later on. It might depend on your certain situation, but it seems for the most part, it is more risky to hide that your a recovering addict then to just tell them. It really does depend on your friend or partner too. In most cases they might find it ok. But I guess people can be difficult, different, and unpredictable, so you might have to be the judge of that. But overall, I think it's much better to tell them because it can create trust issues if you don't.
November 3rd, 2015 3:24pm
Yes! If you trust these people I feel it's best to talk about it so they can help you with your recovery, or at the very least, not put you in any kinda of situation where you may relapse.
February 15th, 2016 10:39pm
Part of recovery is having a support system. If you think it will help you on your path to recovery, Let people in to that world and allow them to help you stay on track.
February 16th, 2016 6:41am
Absolutely,Honest is the best way to handle this. Giving someone the knowledge that they deserve, so they can make the decision,if they would like to continue the relationship.
March 28th, 2016 9:20pm
You can tell whoever you like if you feel up for it, No one needs to know your business unless you think that person deserves to know.
August 8th, 2017 1:32pm
If you would like them to help you with your feelings or you would like to open up then yes of course you should. But also know that you have no obligation to talk about it and if you don't want to share you don't have to.
February 21st, 2017 10:07am
That is a very personal decision which in reality only you can answer. Looking at the pro's and cons of telling them. Why you would tell them?:Wanting to be honest. Having them their as support and ensuring they understand your situation. Beimg accepted for who you are. Why wouldn't you tell them? : fear of being judged. People acting differently around you. Not wanting the pressure of others knowing incase you have a slip up. Being honest with yourself about your reasons is very important when coming making this decision. Honesty is really important in healthy relationships and you deserve to be accepted for who you are.
May 29th, 2018 5:47am
Yes you should. If that partner or friend means much to you and is a big part of your life, and you consider yourself a big part in their life, they have a right to know this about you an they should support you too.
May 29th, 2018 11:30pm
Definitely tell your partner, if they happen to find out later, they'll blame you for being untrustworthy and secretive.
June 12th, 2018 2:30am
It's best to be honest from the start. You have taken a huge step to firstly get help for your addiction, congratulations on that, its not easy for someone to admit that they have a problem and seek help. During this process of recovering you would need all the support you can get, it would be good to start with a friend.
September 7th, 2021 6:34pm
In my opinion, it's important to have a very high level of openness and honesty within a romantic relationship. I think it would be a mistake not to tell a romantic partner that you are a recovering addict. Your partner may feel betrayed, lied to, or hurt that you didn't tell them...especially if they find out when/because you relapsed! As for a friend, I think that the answer becomes more nuanced. Not every friend has to know everything about you, but certainly it's helpful to have at least one friend who you can be open with in this way, if for no other reason than you may need their help one day, and they will be happy to help if they know about your addiction.