I grew up with a family that was addicted to drugs. At what point should I except them or just walk away for good ?
Last Updated: 11/05/2019 at 6:31pm
Halayma Khatun, M.A Theology(U.K, UAE), Diploma With Distinction in Counseling, Certification trauma abandonment
Compassionate, patient, experienced depression counselor. I use Psychodynamic counseling techniques. My counseling experience is +8 years, I counsel women.
Top Rated Answers
it depends on you about how much care for them, if you feel you can handle, surely you must accept them as they are and move forward without trying to change them, if you feel you can't tolerate them, then may be it is good for you to walk away, but in every situation it must be your prerogative to know what is my role in that situation or what is my duty, if you figure that out, things will be simpler, but we can try to be tolerant like that of a tree and humble like that of grass, that is the general duty of being human, rest depends on the severity of the situation and how you perceive it when it comes to you
have they tried to get help and stop? drug abuse is difficult for not only the person but everyone around them. maybe suggesting that they get help would be beneficial to them. it could help to mend the relationship you have with them. if walking away for good seems like the most rational solution, go for it. just try and remember that they love you, but maybe they just dont know how to show it.
I feel that if they were using for most or all of your life, then you need to: 1) Decide if you want to just accept them as they are with faith that they'll get better through your encouragement, or: 2) Set up boundaries and decide how much time you wish to spend or not spend with them.
You never give up on family, as hard as it is to work through major difficulties it and sometimes it seems easier to walk away it makes you a more resilient person who will be able to cope with a lot more in your own life if you fight and never give up. It's important to find a balance in your life if you take the fighting approach as it can expend a lot of energy.
Can you accept them as they are? They may not be able to change. It's up to the person who is addicted to get help and change their behavior. So, If you can accept them as they are then you would be able to continue a relationship with your family. Which is a good thing, but if it's always stressful. You should really consider walking away, but asking them to get help and when they are sober, you could try to reconnect.
It is important to look at how your interactions with them affect your own mental health. Because they are family, that makes us more likely to forgive, but it’s important not to forget yourself if generally you feel negatively afterward. If there are certain mediums other than in-person interactions that work for you try that as you ease back into talking with them more. If they are making steps toward self improvement, that may be a sign you should stick around. If not, that is up for you to decide. I would recommend that their reason to improve be internal to them since everything else is fluid and can change. Be helpful, but don’t make them overly reliant on you as they improve themselves.
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