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Am I an awful person for having anxiety about my boyfriend being really close friends with his ex?

8 Answers
Last Updated: 07/31/2018 at 5:50am
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
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Deane Rain Marie, LMFT

Marriage & Family Therapist

I take a holistic approach in working with eating disorders, mood disorders, relationships, and the LGBTQ community. I use EMDR, Dreamwork, Stories, CBT and Cinema therapy.

Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
August 23rd, 2016 4:24am
I think it's totally normal. But I don't think it's okay for your bf to be friends with his ex. Even true therapist says in order for a relationship to work with trust, you need to have platonic friends.
simplyIntroverted268
August 24th, 2016 3:09am
No, I don't think you're awful. We all have that anxious feeling from time to time in our relationships. But it's important not to let that anxiety get the better of you.
Hearken
August 24th, 2016 7:50am
Having anxiety over your significant other being friends with an ex is completely normal. After all, they were with that person in the past, there is history there. It is important to realize though that them being friends does not mean a disaster is looming for your relationship, he is with you after all, not them! Observe how they act toward each other, how he treats you, and so on. If the anxiety is justified because they act too close for your comfort, have a discussion about it. The important thing is to look after yourself and make sure you are happy.
Anonymous
September 6th, 2016 11:21am
It's normal to be a little edgy when the person you love or care for in such manner seems to have a close relationship with someone else, especially someone you know they have had feelings for before. If there are no signs of him being more than friends with this person, I suggest you try to tell yourself to worry a bit less, as worrying isn't healthy. I hope you are well and that this helped! :)
Brittany8013
November 14th, 2017 3:19pm
No, Absolutely not. You are allowed to have your worries and concerns. It is quite normal for spouses to have raised anxiety when it comes to their significant other spending time with their past lover(s). I have personally experienced this, and i can assure you, you are not in the wrong. However it is important to have open communication about this subject. And if you need added support, myself or another listener will be happy to support you!
endearingLion70
April 9th, 2018 1:10pm
Having close relationships with someone's ex can be awkward for the current girl friend and it demand a full honesty and trust to prevent anxiety.
gloriousPudding18
May 1st, 2018 12:45am
No, you're not. It's okay to have anxiety. Try and talk to your boyfriend about it so you can work through your anxiety.
generousRabbit93
July 31st, 2018 5:50am
no not at all, it is something weird and you should ask him about that because no one would like that, you not the only one