How can I explain to people my irrational fear?
Last Updated: 12/16/2019 at 5:51pm
Stacey Kiger, LPC
Licensed Professional Counselor
My belief is that therapy is not about giving advice, but joining you on your journey
Top Rated Answers
That's just the thing -- no fear IS irrational. That being said, some people are quick to believe the opposite anyway. If this happens to be the case, the easiest way to go about explaining your fear would be to start with the words, "I KNOW this irrational, but X scares me and causes Y to happen. As little or petty as it may sound to you, it is a real problem for me."
That's definitely a tricky thing. I have several irrational fears myself, and it's no easy task to tell others about it without feeling that they'll judge me or not understand. Sadly, sometimes people just won't understand but even if they don't, they can learn to deal with it and be respectful of the fact that you have it. I suggest just doing your best to explain in a way that may be relatable to them. If you can frame it in the context of a similar fear that they may understand, that can help. Otherwise, finding those people who you can trust to be open minded and understanding can be the best way to go, and sometimes those people can help you explain it to others and provide you with support.
Remind them the answer is in the fact it's an irrational fear - it's irrational, no one can explain it.
Start with somebody you feel comfortable around such as a best friend or family member. Although it can be hard, try to walk them through how your irrational fear makes you feel. If you want to, let them know that you are aware that it is irrational but it is still very much a problem for you. If you need to be put into a situation that requires you to deal with your fear, make sure people know so that they can help you if needed. I have an irrational fear of blood tests. When I finally had to go for one, I explained to my mum how it made me feel. I told her that I panic, what exactly makes me afraid of them and also ensured she knew that I knew it was irrational. Of course, it differs per person but it can help to be upfront about it.
Just tell them how you feel and how it effects you. Tell them in a way where they understand how it makes you feel.
Everyone has fear and it is quite normal to be fearful of things. The best way would be to tell people that talking about the topic related to your fear makes you uncomfortable.
The hardest part is explaining your fear(s) to someone who isn't willing to listen or simply doesn't understand. Sometimes, you just need to accept the fact that some people will never understand but with others, they will get where you're coming from mostly from experience or empathy.
Be up front with them about it, really. You can even explain to them that you -know- it's irrational, but that doesn't make you any less afraid of it. Explain that it's a phobia, which is a mental health disorder-- thus, you can't simply make it disappear, or will it away. Nobody can think themselves out of a heart attack, so why should someone be able to simply think themselves out of a phobia? When the fear strikes, it can be powerful, and without professional help, it may be difficult to reach normality.
It can be hard to explain to others a fear you have that is irrational in nature. It's important to state no matter how "irrational" the fear may be to others, it is very real for you. Asking for understanding can be a big step in explaining your fears. Also explaining how scared or the feelings you get when you come across said fear can help others relate to the sensation you experience. We all experience fear (and the feeling fear can be well, scary!), but we don't all experience it for the same things. If others can understand how scared you get they can begin to understand your fear a little better.
Just that. Fears do not have to be 'rational' -- there are fears that are logical, there are fears, of things that are possible.. and most likely will come true. I brace myself for those. However, there are also things deep down I know will never come true but a little voice or vibe in my keeps luring me back and no matter the amount of reinsurance... it's still a fear.
I don't think that it is an irrational fear. Fear is just fear. I understand that sometimes we see it very difficult but we can try to say it. First, we need to accept ourselves. If we accept ourselves and If we know ourselves then we'll know how to explain it to other people. If it's still difficult, we can give an example, we can say when was the last time we had that fear, how it was the environment, what we felt, and if there are other people around us. Or we can say whatever comes to our mind, it is better to say our fear than to keep it.
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