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May 15th, 2019 3:33am
How can we stop resisting the anxiety? And accept it?
What has helped me a great deal is an analogy to being in a canoe with a strong current, you can't steer against it or take right angles, the river doesn't allow it. We have our paddle, and with that, we have some semblance of control over our lives.
I've learned that through radical acceptance, there are things that are wrong and I don't accept it as being the final outcome.
I can't change the rules; I can work around something and allow that I can't change all things.
Some things I must accept as they are.
Like my anxiety, it is an extension of myself which I can't change. I can change my attitude and accept that I am "hard-wired" but not take all the anxiety as if I have no control. I have meditation, music, my art and writing, I have all sorts of ways to combat my stress. I have to choose to direct my energies at something more productive for me.
Try to relax your body. Each time that you feel a part of your body tense up, you try to relax it. We resist what we fear. Some of us are afraid of feeling our feelings, have negative beliefs about them, and thus try to avoid them so that we don't get the negative feelings associated with these beliefs. If the beliefs are uncovered, and presented in a more digestible way or discarded if false, then our fear of being anxious reduces. Experiencing the anxiety instead of resisting it greatly reduces the suffering it brings; that outlook may help you resist it. If you put yourself in a safe place and otherwise comfortable situation when anxious, it can also be facilitated; sometimes we are coping with so many little discomforts that it is like there are not resources left to deal with the anxiety feelings too, so we resist it.
Anxiety is part of life. Not all life. Once you allow yourself to experience it and let it pass without reacting to it, and you feel the relief that that means, it can get a lot easier, as you may feel more eager to go down that tunnel knowing that there is a sure light at the end, rather than resisting it and facing the same tunnel over and over. The first time may be the hardest. Have hope!