Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav

How do I know if I did the right thing?

280 Answers
Last Updated: 05/25/2022 at 8:57pm
How do I know if I did the right thing?
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Lauren Abasheva, LMHC

Licensed Professional Counselor

A sex positive, and kink knowledgeable therapist with an open mindset and a clear understanding that we are all different.

Top Rated Answers
CLMarshal57
July 26th, 2018 8:37pm
If you feel good about your decision. Sometimes, doing the right thing isn't always an easy choice. But if you can look back on it and know that what you chose was the right choice to make in the moment, then you did fine.
Bluelight33
July 29th, 2018 2:56pm
How do you feel after doing? Did you reach your goal? Without unjustified behavior to others? If you can answer all this with yes, I would say the right thing is done. What would you say? :)
phosphenerelief
August 2nd, 2018 9:26pm
We can't always do the right thing - as different responses are right to different people. But as long as you have done something after carefully considering your intention, its impact on yourself and others and are acting in a way that does not cause unnecessary or avoidable hurt, then it can be regarded as the right thing.
Anonymous
August 3rd, 2018 3:43pm
Look at your self in the mirror and ask your self if your happy and saticfid? The dicision you've made, impacts your life and people's life on a good way ? Does it feel good ? If the answer is yes then yes you did the right thing
SugarMoon34
August 8th, 2018 9:32pm
personally I think that we have to trust that we made the right decision for ourselves at the time. if it was a different time, say a year down the line, maybe would do things differently, but right here right now, we choose what is best for us
YourCaringConfidant
August 15th, 2018 3:56am
You know you did the right thing if you struggled to do it. Like really struggled. I have always been told that the right thing to do is the hardest thing to do... it is so easy to do the wrong thing.
SelfCareSally
August 15th, 2018 2:12pm
It's always the right thing to be present and listen. There's so many people who don't have that support - let just being there for them be enough :)
DipityEnigma
September 1st, 2018 6:28pm
This question is pretty vague but I'll try to help you with this as much as possible. Depending upon the situation, you will feel uncertainty such as this but if you truly feel as though you've done the wrong thing, then perhaps it would help to write out the pro's and con's of what you've done or said. Write down what the outcome of the situation is or could result in from what you've done/said. Write out what you could have done/said instead. Now, look at what you've written and decide whether or not you think you done the right thing or whether you could have handled the situation differently for a more positive outcome. Hope this helps.
JK8287
September 28th, 2018 12:48am
You don't have to worry so much always if you did the right thing. We're on earth to learn, so making small mistakes is okay. As long as your intention and heart is pure, there's really no such thing as a mistake (it comes when you "miss taking" a lesson -- true mistakes). Another thing that may help you is to know the distinction between guilt and a pinch. When you've really done something wrong, you'll feel it in your body. It will make you wretch almost, you'll feel so bad. And that type of pinch is always about the result of an action, whereas guilt is this nagging thing, like being in this nether zone where you can never relax. I would say feel your pinches deeply, but drop your guilt totally. You are made of love.
Anonymous
October 17th, 2018 1:53pm
It's not always easy. We often overthink and question our decisions. The truth is there is not one perfect way that works for everyone all the time. And there is no one besides you that can tell if you did the right thing. You can feel it and just know. Sometimes it just takes time to see if what you did was right. And that's okay. Be patient. Also don't be too harsh on yourself. You are doing what you feel is right in a certain situation. We are always learning. So, don't be afraid of making mistakes sometimes, that's how we learn :)
snickerpoodle
November 11th, 2018 6:10pm
Ask your self how it made you feel. How do you think it made others feel? Were your actions or words kind, were they necessary, were they true? If it was at least two of the above, then it was probably right. If you feel that you have somehow hurt yourself or another by your actions, that is not always a bad thing. It just so happens that sometimes pain or a little uncomfortableness are needed to make a difference and move on. Being rude is never needed, you can express your beliefs politely, try not to lie and I believe that you have done the right thing.
Serenittyy166
November 22nd, 2018 1:20am
There is no right or wrong or even easy way to tell the difference everyone’s opinions or ideas will be different sometimes similar but not always the exact same if I forgot to brush my teeth just once in my life do I think I am wrong? No. Other people might and that’s okay. I say you know if you’ve done the right thing if you feel it in your mind in your spirit in your heart when you do it not 48 hours later when guilt or doubt sets in but in the act if you were sure in that moment it must’ve been right for you.
Tao33
December 13th, 2018 6:52am
Do we ever really know if we did the right thing? Your gut and your heart are good barometers. If they align and agree, you probably made the right choice. But what I know for a fact is that the only wrong choice is not choice at all. It’s far better to have lived and loved and lost than to have never have lived and loved at all. So, see doubt as a learning opportunity; a chance to adventure into questions that might further elucidate matters. Sleeping on it is always a good idea, if you’re not sure which choice to make. Also, quiet your mind, sit with yourself quietly, and ask yourself, What is the best course of action? Oftentimes, when the mind is quiet, the doubt dissipates and this, the answer is free to rise.
Anonymous
January 3rd, 2019 4:32am
You don’t, really, and the only thing you can do about it is to accept it. Life can be confusing and sometimes we make mistakes. That’s okay! You may never know if you did the right thing, or you might realize the answer one day out of the blue. Whatever result had happened, it’s important to remember that we’ve already done it, and to learn from it. Overthinking can be the cause to many problems and the best thing to do sometimes is to just say ‘to hell with it’ and try your best to being your best self.
Anonymous
January 18th, 2019 12:51pm
You can never know instantly. If it felt right for you in that moment, it was probably the best option you had, but you can only say it for sure after some time has passed and you can see the consequences of your actions. However, I think there is no such thing as the "wrong" thing to do if your intentions are good. Rethinking and lining out all the "what if I had..." can easily cause stress, anxiety and insecurity, so try to stand by your decisions, even though it's very hard sometimes! Also, there is no definition for the "right" and "wrong" thing to do, there will always be people who are affected in some way, and there is nothing that is good for everyone.
wildflowerbee
February 22nd, 2019 9:52pm
You know you have done the right thing when your heart is at peace and is content. And you feel proud of the decision you made. And you know that no matter how many times you go back and are in that situation you'd still make that same decision. That is when you know you have did the right thing or made the right decision. It's as simple as that, yet it's not so easy to get there or make a choice that makes you feel that way. But when you do make that choice or you do the "right thing" know that it's the most beautiful albeit sometimes difficult and painful you could have done.
CarpeNoctem22
May 22nd, 2019 6:35pm
It depends, is it something worthy that won't be making you problems after or make you anxious, is it something that will do more damage than good? Sometimes we have to give up on something to embrace something better. That scenario doesn't happen ways but sometimes a sacrifice is needed. We just need to think about it, writing it down could help so that we can remind ourselves in the future. As long as it makes you feel good, makes you a better person then it shouldn't be devastating at least.
Anonymous
July 11th, 2019 8:53pm
A good way to tell if you did the right thing is by looking at the consequences, either positive or negative, of your action. If others are doing better and you feel like you have had a positive impact, then that’s a pretty good way to tell that you did the right thing. If not, a way to tell whether or not your action had negative consequences would be to look at those around you and how it impacted you. Overall, you decide whether or not what you did was good for you, but you will still need to look at how your actions impact others.
Artist13
December 15th, 2019 4:10am
Visualise different outcomes and evaluate each and every one of them and weight the pros and cons. It can give you closure if you do so and then you will feel confident about what you did. Also, before you act, do the same pros and cons list so you can kind of predict what will happen following the event. You also know if you did the right thing if you talk about it with someone, like friends, family, siblings or listeners on 7 cups. Closure is a miracle cure for anxiety about performing a certain act and that is why it is crucial to know if we did the right thing
Laurall123
January 20th, 2021 5:10am
There’s never really a sure fire way to know if you did the right thing or not, you can never be certain. But I do believe that if it is right then somewhere deep down it’ll feel like the right thing. Sometimes the right thing doesn’t always feel right, maybe it contradicts our feelings and that’s okay because even though it may not feel 100% right there’s a reason why in the moment you thought it was the right thing. If it’s truly the right thing then a part of you even a small one thinks it was and I hope you’ll let that be good enough for you. Allow yourself the peace of thinking it was right because regret will only hold you back
Anonymous
May 5th, 2021 5:19pm
You know if you did the right thing when you get something beneficial out of your action or you know because you begin to feel good about yourself. Sometimes people tend to overthink their actions, and that can lead to someone questioning whether they did the right thing or not. Regardless, you can always tell by the people around you and the way you’re feeling. Do you feel good after what you just did? Could you tell someone what you just did without getting in trouble? If so, then you probably did do the right thing. It’s important to ask yourself those questions.
SchmellyAshley
April 11th, 2021 7:31am
Hmm.. That is a very interesting question. When I look at our world today, many people have been believing in the saying, "Don't let others stop you from doing what you love, as long as you did the right thing." Now, how do we know if we did the right thing? It's pretty hard actually. But if you look more into it, it becomes simpler as time passes and we get used to it. So, everyone's familiar with the saying, "Think before you speak," right? Well, that's exactly what you should do first. Before you do something, try thinking about the possible results. Will it hurt or offend someone? What good can this action do? What's the purpose? Of course, there's very little chance that your actions don't have any side effects, so you still gotta be ready for rocks of problems thrown on your way. But not to worry! Just treat those chunks of rock like pebbles and swap them outta your way with courage and with the people that care about you. With them, you can never be unstoppable!
Anonymous
April 9th, 2021 3:11am
That is up to you to decide.You do what you think is best because sometimes when you think you did the right thing to other people you might have done the wrong thing. Doing the right thing means knowing what so do correctly and in a humble manner and way. Doing the right thing can be hard sometimes or even a little scary but it is the right thing to do.So yeah basically if you think that you have have done the right thing then you personally probably have but to other to you probly didn't it really just depends.
Anonymous
April 3rd, 2021 6:01am
The right thing? Everything you do is the right thing, if you think that it is the right thing. Trust yourself. Everything happens for a reason, and this is just one of the things. Even if you question it now, it already passed. You can't change it, and you will have to believe it is the right thing. Always remember: it's going to be okay. you can do this. this is normal. Don't overthink. This isn't anything to be overthinking, you did the right thing. Don't regret. Don't be guilty. This is the way life is. it is going to be okay. you can do this. this is normal.
Anonymous
March 10th, 2021 7:59pm
From what you are saying I can really hear that you are feeling confused about the outcome of a decision or reaction you expressed. It can sometimes be hard to know if we did the right thing. The term "right" can sometimes feel subjective. If we think of this in general terms, doing the right thing often has the right results, meaning as well as doing what is morally best. Reflection is an important part of life and can lead us to make better decisions and actions. This process can help you to analyze how all people and situations involved were impacted by the action. Did everyone/everything (or most people/things) grow from the action in the end? What are my boundaries? How much intervention from other people do I like or dislike? Did my actions, intentions or decisions impact people positively or negatively? We can use these questions to assess our past actions and to know whether what we did was right. We can even use these questions to guide our future actions. Do you want to express your thoughts and feelings anonymously? Why not communicate with one of our listeners or online therapists who have lived experience or have specialized in areas such as stress?
Anonymous
February 28th, 2021 8:48am
Time. You will know once time passes, however if you feel like you did the right thing then you probably did the right thing, I feel like time will make you see what you did and give you a different perspective of what you did, and what you could've done differently, but if you didn't the most important thing here is to learn from it, because everyone makes mistakes! , it's okay not to be sure if you did the right thing, so I understand how you feel, however, I hope you are able to figure everything out and I hope my answer has helped.
Anonymous
January 20th, 2021 5:18pm
You will know if you did the right thing if you don't regret it. You will know if you don't wish you did something else. One of my close friends once taught me this trick. You write down the different things you could do on small sheets of paper. Fold them up and throw them in a jar and shake it. Pick out a piece of paper from the jar. How do you feel when you read what's on the piece of paper? If you're excited, you want to do what's on that piece of paper. If you're not, you should know what you want to do right now. Even if you choose to do the wrong thing, it's okay. We are human and we make mistakes. The worst thing you can do is not learning from your mistake.
MaggieJoy
November 21st, 2020 9:14pm
They seem to be happier when conversation is done. We don’t always know, but we do our best. And I know I followed the rules, with encouragement and identifying with them by things I learned. By knowing I wasn’t bossy or pushy, and really listening. I’ve had a few that were inappropriate and I handled that well. I was not sarcastic with people, showed compassion. Listening and retaining what they said and referring back to that. I don’t give unsolicited advice. I try to not sound superior. I refer them to the proper channels when it’s out of hand. I know my limitations. Empathy is one of my better qualities, but I don’t let these conversations spill into my real.
Anonymous
November 28th, 2020 5:44pm
Sometimes, doing the right thing means that you don't feel right. Sometimes you have to do things that will hurt other people, and that will hurt you. But remember that it is for the best. Remind yourself that you are doing the right thing and if that hurts other people in the process, then that's that. They may get mad, but then they'll get over it. Sometimes you just need to do things that will hurt other people, but in the long run it will be the right thing for them. Don't let it get into your head, it will get better eventually, and if that person doesn't see that eventually, than they really aren't your friends. Real friends realize that you have their best interest at heart and they will thank you for that!
Anonymous
November 29th, 2020 11:53am
Sometimes it's hard to tell if you made the right decision or not, but most of the time if you feel good about the thing you've done and that thing has done someone else or something else good too you know you've done the right thing. If you have a bad feeling about something that sometimes can just be overthinking and it helps clearing your brain of negative thoughts, calming down and just trying to think straight without any of the bad thoughts floating around. That way you can really think about it without getting stressed out. Do things that help you feel calm and safe to clear your head.