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How do I know if I did the right thing?

274 Answers
Last Updated: 01/16/2022 at 1:17pm
How do I know if I did the right thing?
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Andrea Tuck, LCPC

Licensed Professional Counselor

I tackle and discuss a multitude of social and emotional health issues. I have a belief that through empowerment and non-judgmental support clients' can thrive.

Top Rated Answers
creativePeace9847
July 25th, 2020 1:06pm
It is an honor to answer this question. In many cases, I also ask myself whether I am doing it 1. Does this hurt others? If you don’t know the answer, please ask someone related to this matter. 2. Will I regret it after five or ten years? If you don’t know the answer, please ask a respectable old man or your own parents. 3.Does it make me happy? If you don't know the answer, please try to do a little or ask your friends about whether you are happy. If the answer to both questions is yes, you have done the right things. Else , don't worry. Everyone make mistakes.
Anonymous
August 14th, 2020 5:35pm
You don’t. It’s rarely that black and white. Some things that work for some people don’t work for others. Just like in real life therapy. Some styles/personalities work with you and some don’t. It’s alright if you didn’t exactly help someone. Showing that you care about them- a stranger on the internet is a lot. Just as long as you help them find someone that will work for them. You just have to focus on the fact that you tried. You gave them something that they probably don’t have in their life.
wonderfulLove1327
August 29th, 2020 7:17pm
You might be looking for one person that gives validation to the decision you have made, and I have some great news for you: you are that person. Listen to your instincts; human beings are amazing creatures and we can sense when something is off and out body can alerts us of situations like danger. Normally when we make a decision that we are not sure of, one thing we can do to make sure we did the right thing is to ask ourselves how are we feeling? Do you feel relieve? Do you feel you drop a weight off your shoulders? Those are the kind of signs you should look for. Listen to your gut ! :)
Kalmkendrick231
September 9th, 2020 7:46am
Well! first and foremost it depends....what you did actually? ask yourself that out! Also, everyone gets to know if they did a right thing or not after a certain point of time. How? well if you would have done a wrong thing there will certainly be consequences which you will have to bear by yourself. If ton the other hand you did a right thing then you would be rewarded for sure, one or the other way! And last but not least don't stress out. It's ok sometimes to have a confusion as to what to do when many a times life throws complicated choices at us.
caringBerry61
September 16th, 2020 7:37pm
The answer depends on what circumstance prompts you to ask this question. The concept of right or wrong depends on many factors. Often our idea of right or wrong comes from our past, from the teachings we have received, from what we have been taught about right and wrong, especially when these matters are part of the education that our parents once received. from their parents and so back for generations. What is right for us may not be right for other people and very often this makes us feel inadequate or the judgment of others makes us believe we are in the wrong even when we believe we have done the right thing. Our idea of right depends on many factors but certainly, we should always remember that everything that is right must be right for ourselves and for our neighbour so that our deeds do not create further suffering for ourselves and consequently for others. Ultimately ask your heart and find the right answer inside yourself.
Anonymous
October 3rd, 2020 8:59am
Well, I guess you'll never figure it out what is the best thing to do. Sometimes your intuition is going to lead you towards the best solution, but that does not happen all the time. That is where the regret comes from, mostly. Everything in life has advantages and disadvantages. Thinking that you need to find the PERFECT solution might not lead you to anything. So, analyzing a situation is important. Choosing the situation that has the most advantages for yourself, compared to the other solutions ins what you can do. Do not expect for something to be perfect, try to make it at least good for yourself. :)
CodyCares
October 18th, 2020 12:28am
It takes time for one person to know if they did the right thing. In life we should always be asking ourselves, what is the right next step? Through time and self reflection will we see if we made the right decision. If you did not do the right things, that is ok! Nobody is perfect and we as humans always make mistakes. It's apart of life. But taking the next right step is taking the responsibility of learning from your mistakes so you dont do it again. Thats when you will be able to learn what the next right step is. That is when you will know you did the right thing. It's also balancing what you think is right in your head and right in your heart. Always follow your heart ❤
Anonymous
October 22nd, 2020 6:59pm
As long as it stands up to your moral standards. If you hurt someone for your own benefit, I wouldn't say that was the right thing to do but in the end its what feels right and what you thought best, not easiest or quickest. Hurting someone with your choice would also mean that it wasn't the right thing to do, for example, you decided to break up with someone because you felt as tho you weren't treating them right. was it the right thing to do? maybe you could have tried to tear them better or talk to them about it instead of acting on your own. In the end what you think is right has to help you or a person in the long run. cheap tricks and excuses are almost never the right thing to do.
Anonymous
November 6th, 2020 9:01pm
If you feel at peace with what you have done. If you don't second guess what you've done, you did the right thing. Doing the right thing may come with losing people, adversity, and trials. But in the end, your conscience will be free of guilt or shame. Doing the right thing means that you are morally sound. It may come with a cost if you do the right thing, but that is okay. For example, if you tell your friend something they do not want to hear, but you know it is for their own good, and they get mad at you, that is one type of repercussion. But, you know they will appreciate it later on.
MaggieJoy
November 21st, 2020 9:14pm
They seem to be happier when conversation is done. We don’t always know, but we do our best. And I know I followed the rules, with encouragement and identifying with them by things I learned. By knowing I wasn’t bossy or pushy, and really listening. I’ve had a few that were inappropriate and I handled that well. I was not sarcastic with people, showed compassion. Listening and retaining what they said and referring back to that. I don’t give unsolicited advice. I try to not sound superior. I refer them to the proper channels when it’s out of hand. I know my limitations. Empathy is one of my better qualities, but I don’t let these conversations spill into my real.
Anonymous
November 28th, 2020 5:44pm
Sometimes, doing the right thing means that you don't feel right. Sometimes you have to do things that will hurt other people, and that will hurt you. But remember that it is for the best. Remind yourself that you are doing the right thing and if that hurts other people in the process, then that's that. They may get mad, but then they'll get over it. Sometimes you just need to do things that will hurt other people, but in the long run it will be the right thing for them. Don't let it get into your head, it will get better eventually, and if that person doesn't see that eventually, than they really aren't your friends. Real friends realize that you have their best interest at heart and they will thank you for that!
Anonymous
November 29th, 2020 11:53am
Sometimes it's hard to tell if you made the right decision or not, but most of the time if you feel good about the thing you've done and that thing has done someone else or something else good too you know you've done the right thing. If you have a bad feeling about something that sometimes can just be overthinking and it helps clearing your brain of negative thoughts, calming down and just trying to think straight without any of the bad thoughts floating around. That way you can really think about it without getting stressed out. Do things that help you feel calm and safe to clear your head.
Stewie92
December 16th, 2020 6:29am
The right thing can be different for everyone. One persons right thing is the wrong for another. What you need to ask yourself is the thing you did, did it bring you peace? Is your life a little bit easier now. Did anyone get hurt? If it helped you feel better and move on and no one got physically hurt then it was the right thing for you. It may take some time for you to understand that it was the right thing to do. Sometimes it is better to care for yourself and put your happiness in front of others.
Anonymous
January 14th, 2021 3:57pm
It honestly depends. What is the "right thing?" It may be different for everyone. Ultimately, however, the right thing should be when you can understand the value of this thing. No matter the impact it has on you, your gut tells you it was the best possible decision that you could have made. Sometimes, you will feel a little bit uncomfortable and scared by this decision- that is completely okay. And while you will be questioning the decision, it will ultimately make you a more confident person and soon, you will understand why your decision was the right decision.
Laurall123
January 20th, 2021 5:10am
There’s never really a sure fire way to know if you did the right thing or not, you can never be certain. But I do believe that if it is right then somewhere deep down it’ll feel like the right thing. Sometimes the right thing doesn’t always feel right, maybe it contradicts our feelings and that’s okay because even though it may not feel 100% right there’s a reason why in the moment you thought it was the right thing. If it’s truly the right thing then a part of you even a small one thinks it was and I hope you’ll let that be good enough for you. Allow yourself the peace of thinking it was right because regret will only hold you back
Anonymous
January 20th, 2021 5:18pm
You will know if you did the right thing if you don't regret it. You will know if you don't wish you did something else. One of my close friends once taught me this trick. You write down the different things you could do on small sheets of paper. Fold them up and throw them in a jar and shake it. Pick out a piece of paper from the jar. How do you feel when you read what's on the piece of paper? If you're excited, you want to do what's on that piece of paper. If you're not, you should know what you want to do right now. Even if you choose to do the wrong thing, it's okay. We are human and we make mistakes. The worst thing you can do is not learning from your mistake.
Anonymous
February 27th, 2021 3:47am
Being in a position that could potentially cause conflict with others, or make you go against your personal morals, leads to difficult decision making processes. It is possible to train your conscious mind to go through these, however. Take a step back to rationally think through the situation. The purpose of this is to ensure you are making the best choice possible to avoid negative consequences. Think about how you got in to your current position. A possible decision on what to do next could arise from how you got yourself there. Ask yourself how a crisis could be avoided. Would doing the right thing be so hard a process if only you did things a bit differently before? Whom else is this affecting? If it is multiple individuals, how will you rising up as the one doing the right thing affect your relations? Compare the current predicament to past experiences where you had to figure out how to do the right thing. Look at what worked or what didn't, and apply what you learned to the present. Imagine possible outcomes. that could happen because of you making a particular decision. Evaluate all, or potentially important outcomes, so you don't decide on an impulse. Make sure you aren't in an environment that pressures you in to making decisions. Especially if you are trying to do the right thing in a professional setting, be conscious of the long-term effects of your actions. Weigh the pros and cons of each outcome. Ask yourself how one result could possibly work better than another. Prepare yourself for any unexpected reactions from others. It may be difficult to expect the unexpected, but getting in the mindset of that possibility can reduce panic and further stress. Consider any other individuals involved. Doing the right thing isn't just about you. Most of the time it involves others, and correcting a wrong holds the possibility of crossing others. On the other hand, other people may help you solve any conflicts and aid you in deciding what to do. Try asking yourself these questions to see how it may affect your decision making: How will “doing the right thing” be for the benefit of others? How will the situations get better when I do it? How will your relationships improve? Worsen? What makes what you're doing “the right thing”? I hope i helped!!
Anonymous
February 28th, 2021 8:48am
Time. You will know once time passes, however if you feel like you did the right thing then you probably did the right thing, I feel like time will make you see what you did and give you a different perspective of what you did, and what you could've done differently, but if you didn't the most important thing here is to learn from it, because everyone makes mistakes! , it's okay not to be sure if you did the right thing, so I understand how you feel, however, I hope you are able to figure everything out and I hope my answer has helped.
Anonymous
March 10th, 2021 7:59pm
From what you are saying I can really hear that you are feeling confused about the outcome of a decision or reaction you expressed. It can sometimes be hard to know if we did the right thing. The term "right" can sometimes feel subjective. If we think of this in general terms, doing the right thing often has the right results, meaning as well as doing what is morally best. Reflection is an important part of life and can lead us to make better decisions and actions. This process can help you to analyze how all people and situations involved were impacted by the action. Did everyone/everything (or most people/things) grow from the action in the end? What are my boundaries? How much intervention from other people do I like or dislike? Did my actions, intentions or decisions impact people positively or negatively? We can use these questions to assess our past actions and to know whether what we did was right. We can even use these questions to guide our future actions. Do you want to express your thoughts and feelings anonymously? Why not communicate with one of our listeners or online therapists who have lived experience or have specialized in areas such as stress?
Anonymous
April 3rd, 2021 6:01am
The right thing? Everything you do is the right thing, if you think that it is the right thing. Trust yourself. Everything happens for a reason, and this is just one of the things. Even if you question it now, it already passed. You can't change it, and you will have to believe it is the right thing. Always remember: it's going to be okay. you can do this. this is normal. Don't overthink. This isn't anything to be overthinking, you did the right thing. Don't regret. Don't be guilty. This is the way life is. it is going to be okay. you can do this. this is normal.
spectacularpanda134679
April 9th, 2021 3:11am
That is up to you to decide.You do what you think is best because sometimes when you think you did the right thing to other people you might have done the wrong thing. Doing the right thing means knowing what so do correctly and in a humble manner and way. Doing the right thing can be hard sometimes or even a little scary but it is the right thing to do.So yeah basically if you think that you have have done the right thing then you personally probably have but to other to you probly didn't it really just depends.
SchmellyAshley
April 11th, 2021 7:31am
Hmm.. That is a very interesting question. When I look at our world today, many people have been believing in the saying, "Don't let others stop you from doing what you love, as long as you did the right thing." Now, how do we know if we did the right thing? It's pretty hard actually. But if you look more into it, it becomes simpler as time passes and we get used to it. So, everyone's familiar with the saying, "Think before you speak," right? Well, that's exactly what you should do first. Before you do something, try thinking about the possible results. Will it hurt or offend someone? What good can this action do? What's the purpose? Of course, there's very little chance that your actions don't have any side effects, so you still gotta be ready for rocks of problems thrown on your way. But not to worry! Just treat those chunks of rock like pebbles and swap them outta your way with courage and with the people that care about you. With them, you can never be unstoppable!
Anonymous
May 5th, 2021 5:19pm
You know if you did the right thing when you get something beneficial out of your action or you know because you begin to feel good about yourself. Sometimes people tend to overthink their actions, and that can lead to someone questioning whether they did the right thing or not. Regardless, you can always tell by the people around you and the way you’re feeling. Do you feel good after what you just did? Could you tell someone what you just did without getting in trouble? If so, then you probably did do the right thing. It’s important to ask yourself those questions.
HoneySugar004
May 5th, 2021 9:42pm
The way I see it, there is no truly right thing. You can try to think about whether it was right or wrong, but you won't be able to get an answer. If you're worried that you may have hurt someone or inflicted pain on another, if you find an opportunity, apologizing would be the best option. Otherwise, don't put too much thought into it. We are imperfect beings, and sometimes we can do the 'wrong' things, and that's okay! What matters is what you are doing after. All you can do is follow your own guts because often staying true to your heart and passions is doing right for you!
honey1755
May 23rd, 2021 11:35pm
There will never be a way we can be completely positive that something we do is the right thing and that’s exactly why stressing out about it and letting thoughts like those control your emotions is something that almost always leads to frustration or will easily make you feel upset. When you realize that you let a thought or a question like this overwhelm you, remind yourself what you’re doing. Treat yourself kinder. Things that are in the past and that cannot be changed, you shouldn’t allow to let change your future too. That’s something you have control of if you let yourself be present, so focus on that instead. You made it this far without knowing if every single choice you made in your entire life was right or wrong so take a deep breath and give yourself some credit.
amyluvvssu2
July 14th, 2021 11:44am
Ask yourself what you would think if your best friend or a close family member did that thing. If you think it is the right thing, then you know it was right. If you don't think it was the right thing, that it probably isn't. In your heart, you know what is right or wrong, and whether what you are doing is right or wrong. Look for ways to find the answer within yourself. Try thinking of other ways of finding the answer within yourself, by creating different scenarios, and posing the same question to yourself.
AMomentInTime1830
July 24th, 2021 1:02pm
Thats a question that only you can ever answer. It’s hard to know what the right thing is, and it can be quite overwhelming and confusing trying to figure it out. Only you will know if you’ve done the right thing, which may not be the best for others but the best for you at the time in that decision. You have to be okay with the choices you make, and know that sometimes you won’t please everyone, but ultimately you’re the one who has to be comfortable with the choice. The next step will be the outcome and how that is for you. If something turns out a way that you aren’t comfortable with, then it’s your choice to change it. You have the control and nothing is ever a permanent “one” way.
Anonymous
September 16th, 2021 5:56pm
Take a paper, jolt down everything that has happened. Also write your feelings or whatever you feel like you should have done (maybe use color pens), if other people are involved write their feelings too (if they have shared or you can just assume or talk to them one on one). Now evaluate. Also don't forget to mention the situation because many a times the settings matter just as much as the intention. As for me, I don't think that any action is fully right or wrong, in fact most of them somewhere in the grey area. Thank you so much.
SomnolentLaelis
September 23rd, 2021 1:23pm
If it feels right, then it's probably right. If it benefits you and the people around you, then it is definitely right! Use that as something to live by! This is purely my opinion though and no one really has to follow it, but its what I believe. If it helps everyone in the situation then it has to be good right? Doing the right thing is something that no one can really judge, it's going off of our culture and what we each think about the thing we did. That is why so many people are concerned about doing the right thing because culture says its wrong!
Anonymous
November 1st, 2021 7:15am
Okey, so if you have done something and it feels good in heart it's right. Some may say it's not, but did you do it for social approvals? To hurt someone in any way? For you secret benefit? If no, then yes you have done right thing and sometimes it does have a little benefit like the peace of heart. If you experienced it then protect it. Sometimes it hurts too, a lot. It's a fact that doing the right thing is not always pretty. It may look ugly but listen to your heart. It won't lie. Forget about what other's will say or already saying. You and your peace of heart, and mind matter. It's something personal and beautiful, protect it and evolve it.