How do I stop thinking about someone I'm obsessing over?

19 Answers
Last Updated: 06/25/2019 at 2:04am
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Top Rated Answers
heycrysteezy
September 15th, 2015 6:22pm
My suggestion, from the bottom of my heart: FIND AS MANY HOBBIES AS YOU CAN FIND!!!!!! There is no need to be obsessing over somebody, whom, odds are, you don't occupy any space in their mind. No need whatsoever. If you're having trouble letting go of this person, and constantly feel the need to keep track of them, what they're up to, finding whatever information you can, I suggest some deep personal reflection. Then do something productive with yourself. Exercise, take up knitting, go for a walk....go for another walk. Talk to people in your life that you care about, and care for you. Bury yourself in work, or the best thing of all which ties everything together: obsess over YOURSELF. Take care of yourself! Treat yourself! Don't let this person live in your mind rent-free. Ask yourself: How is this positive, that I am obsessed with this person? How does it validate me, when I find something out about them?" The answer is that it's not positive, and it doesn't validate you.. You validate you. Become obsessed with yourself, be selfish, do things for you and you only, and you will see amazing improvements. If you're unsure where to start, talking to a therapist, or a professional who can assist in cognitive behavioural therapy, is a great way to get you started and get on your feet. I'll say it one last time because I want it to stick: OBSESS OVER YOURSELF!
kourtney22
August 18th, 2015 4:47pm
I know this sounds biast, but think about their flaws. Maybe there was something in general you didn't like about the person, looks or personality. It will help you think more of "Why was I obsessing over this person?" It really does help, from personal experience. It may sound mean, but if your trying to stop thinking about them, it's really the only way.
Anonymous
February 9th, 2015 7:46am
Don't try to stop thinking about the person at all. The more you try, the more likely you are of failing to. Imagine me telling you not to think of a giant green, blue polka-dot giraffe; what are you thinking of now? Hehe... I say, think about the person, and think of other things and people, too. Let the thoughts flow and turn them constructive. Eventually, going about your business like it's nothing to worry about will actually make it something to not worry about. : ) Sincerely, I hope that helps.
Helpothersallday
February 2nd, 2018 2:56pm
I went through this...hard. I realize what I was obsessing over wasn't even real. We were both single parents and he had filled me with promises of our future together. We would buy a big house for the kids, join incomes, have a long faithful marriage. All the things I wanted. In retrospect those were the things I was obsessing over losing. In actuality we ended up together for years living separate with him never fully committing and those promises and dreams never acted on. He knew what to say to keep me hoping. When I focused on reality, his cheating, non commitment and false promises it helped. Sometimes it's not the person you've been obsessed with but the ideals and beliefs you had surrounding the person. If you're obsessing they probably aren't coming true and you might not be fulfilled and it might not have ever been .. reality.
NotDownYet
July 14th, 2015 4:33pm
A good way to get someone out of your head is by hanging out with others and meeting new people. By doing this, you are filling the void that this other person has left by you not being able to be with them.
OpenedEyes
July 25th, 2016 11:52pm
If you're obsessing over someone and don't want to be then ask yourself, "what do I want" and go for it. And keep pushing for it. And if you're asking, "what good would that do?" let me tell you, you'll begin to think about what you want, then how to get it, and after once you've got it, all you've got to do is keep at it. And that person you're obsessing over might not be the number one thought. But in order to achieve this, you've gotta really want it. Because if you don't, then you'll continue to be in your situation.
Anonymous
January 13th, 2015 6:37am
To stop thinking about someone you've been obsessing over, I would say: remove all photos, messages, and most importantly- GOOD and BAD memories. Surf the Internet, read, take walks. Just settle down.
Anonymous
May 4th, 2015 10:50pm
It might not be a bad think to be obsessing over someone but if it is bothering you, then try to do other things to keep you busy and to get that person out of your mind. Be with friends, read a book, go dance! Do anything that makes you feel better or that takes your mind off that person :)
riverscene13
May 31st, 2016 10:36pm
Try to look at it realistically. Write down all your obsessions and figure out and realize how many are really untrue and exaggerated. Try to think what they're really like and try to think what the situation really is. Work on eliminating that feeling and getting rid of the thoughts that cause the obsession. Change your way of thinking about it.
Anonymous
December 21st, 2015 6:54am
I feel you, it's hard to get that person out of your mind. I find reading really helps when your thinking about "that person"
Anonymous
January 12th, 2016 3:17am
To stop thinking about someone your obsessing over you could do things like listen to music ( silly kind like old Brittney spears and Destiny's child) get your self happy also going out with friends won't hurt :P
Aneesh
July 18th, 2016 7:01am
Stop thinking to stop think. And think about someone you love. Simple as that. Try to make it practical
DrMoo96
June 15th, 2015 4:51am
It will be hard, but look for a distraction, like any activity that will keep your mind away from that person.
blissfulComfort91
July 4th, 2017 6:44pm
This is extremely hard. The only thing that helps me is doing other physical activities like hanging out with friends or running so that my mind is busy. Slowly over time it will get better.
sweetSnow90
December 19th, 2017 6:01pm
Firstly I'd suggest getting some physical distance if you can. Then work through why you are obsessing with them? Figure out what you want from them and if it's healthy and/or possible. Failing that, distraction is key. Spend time with friends. Join a new club. Read or watch t.v. Anything that will take you out of your head for a little while.
Weakgettingstrong
September 6th, 2016 5:57am
Maybe draw, or do something you love to do. That'll probably take your mind off it, or you can speak with friends. :)
Knoxturnal
November 14th, 2017 5:29pm
Channel your thinking into something else. Be it hobbies, other friends or work. If thinking about someone too much is dragging you down, find a way to make use of productively.
intellectualStrings7941
July 27th, 2018 3:53pm
From my experience I joined the gym and I worked on myself I made new friends and decided to go back to school and learn something new in order to forget the person I felt I was obsessing over.
Anonymous
June 25th, 2019 2:04am
I try to see why my life is beneficial without them. Do I really need this person in my life if I have been fine without them for so long? What are some cons of the person themselves? What do you not like over the things you do? Sometimes when listing pros and cons of the person you may realize they might have more cons than pros. Obsessing over a person is a common occurrence I think. Finding distractions like story writing or creating art can be a great way to get your mind off the person. And maybe you'll find out things you never knew you could do.