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How do you deal with people who insist that you are "being dramatic" or telling you to "snap out of it?"

20 Answers
Last Updated: 07/28/2020 at 12:47pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
Canada
Moderated by

Lianne Kirby, MA in Counselling Psychology

Counselor

I believe everyone should have the opportunity for their voice to be heard. I use a trauma informed, person centred approach in counselling.

Top Rated Answers
cestlavie00
January 12th, 2015 12:59pm
Like most people I got frustrated with that. But after a while I realized that's isn't helping me in any way whatsoever. So now, I try to explain to them (as calmly as possible so as to avoid "proving" them right) that my feelings are as real as anything else and that it isn't exactly right for them to say something like that. If they still insist on their views, I remove myself from the conversation. What else can I do? Over time I realized I can't really hold it against them if they do not understand how I feel. Sometimes it may be my fault in poorly communicating, other times it may be their fault for not understanding. I think it's nothing to hold against as it doesn't help.
MariePier
October 24th, 2016 4:06pm
I tell them it's my way of being and I prefer to express feelings and emotions that keep everything inside and feel bad.
peacefulSummer36
May 16th, 2015 11:27pm
Don't listen to them. I know it may seem like what they are saying is true, but it's not. Dealing with depression or self harm or really anything else in general is a serious matter. Yes, there are some people that say they are depressed or they say they harm themselves to get attention, but don't let those bad apples make you feel like you're the one who is wrong. These are serious matters that need to be addressed. You are not alone.
NotDownYet
July 14th, 2015 4:45pm
These people may be trying to help you in their own way. This is how they get out of situations like that, but it isn't right for you. Don't listen to them, but continue seeking help from people who will help you get to the root of the issues.
wonderousShoulder94
June 13th, 2016 7:34am
just ignore them, you are just being yourself, and there is nothing wrong with that. just be yourself
AndyDufresne1994
February 21st, 2017 9:11pm
I think you must, simply must cut those people out. I had to do it. Life is too short to be non-stop tied up in mental knots. You can drive yourself into an early grave when you don't let your mind relax and have time to just "be". It is one of the hardest things to deal with ever.
supportiveBlanket47
June 14th, 2015 7:23pm
I find that people who tend to insist you are being dramatic don't fully understand your situation. They don't understand what you are going through and therefore don't know how much of a problem it is to you, if they keep insisting then just tell them that for you it is a problem and you feel upset or hurt that they don't see that. Also just say if you think i am being dramatic i would prefer you just leave the topic instead of being unsupportive about it:)
Anonymous
July 7th, 2015 12:14pm
Tell them that you can't just "Stop bing dramatic" because it's actually really bothering you! They cannot tell you how to feel. Sometimes you can't just 'snap out of it' because it's worse than that.
Ceras
July 21st, 2015 7:09am
I try and rationalize, not everybody is able to understand how I feel and what is going on. People might not want to go in depth to how I´m doing and go for a quick easy answer.
Anonymous
September 7th, 2015 4:01pm
Tell them it's just who you are, you cant change your personality at the click of your fingers. Were all different so if someone cant deal with it then tell them to just ignore it!
PoliteOcean
September 7th, 2015 9:56pm
It can be hard to deal with people who don't understand the way you feel and why. You can try talking with them one on one and letting them know how you feel. You can also seek some information and literature on what you are going through to help them understand better.
Anonymous
December 21st, 2015 9:18pm
My favourite way to deal with situations like this is to compare mental illness to physical illness. You wouldn't tell someone with a broken leg to snap out of it, or someone with migraines to stop being dramatic so why you say these things to people with mental illnesses.
anyquestion97
January 11th, 2016 7:58am
If there's something on your mind and you feel bad about it, then it's okay. If it's a big deal for you, it's a big deal. If it get's to you, it does. People may not always understand the exact feeling you're feeling.
Jollygal17
March 1st, 2016 10:59pm
You do what you feel is best for you. Sometimes it's so hard to snap out of it. If they don't understand that it may be best to distance yourself from them for a little while.
Silent0raindrop
May 16th, 2016 1:53am
Your feelings after valid no matter how people understand it. People might not be in your situation so they can't relate and their way of dealing with things might be to ignore it and that's the only advice they can give
ZenOwl
January 9th, 2017 2:24am
Yuck. Unfortunately, not everyone will be informed or care to show compassion. When others think I'm being dramatic, I ask myself why they think I'm being unreasonable. (Could I, perhaps, dial-down my reaction to certain things that upset me?) If I think I have a foundation to justifiably be upset and react a certain way, I tell them so. If they do not like it, I set a boundary to only interact with them on my terms. Boundaries are excellent for self-care and also for others to know how to treat you!
sweetSnow90
January 8th, 2018 7:18am
In my experience people who often tell other they are being dramatic etc aren't really listening to what you are saying. They are unwilling to communicate openly with you at this time. I have found approaching them at another time or in a different way to be helpful e.g. writing a letter. If that fails then it may be up to you to let whatever the issue is, go and move on.
Anonymous
January 9th, 2018 11:11pm
Understand that they cannot comprehend what you experience. Seek alternate support from others in order to gain better resolutions to the issue
moonlightpeace
June 11th, 2018 6:19pm
I choose to talk to someone who will understand what I am going through. Not everyone understands, and that’s okay. You’re never alone, remember that.
proudPeace77
July 28th, 2020 12:47pm
Ignore them or defend yourself, then take some time away from them and tell yourself that you know best, unless of course you think there is some truth in what they say. Sometimes when people say things that you don't like it is because they are coming from a different place in the situation and they don't see things the way you see them or feel how you feel. It may be good to remind them the importance of empathy, even if they don't like it, maybe one day it will sink in. It is a difficult one really, but you must remember that everyone is different.