Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav

How to stop overthinking things in a relationship?

213 Answers
Last Updated: 04/16/2020 at 8:22pm
How to stop overthinking things in a relationship?
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Jannise McKamey-Bruell, LAPC


I am a nonjudgmental counselor that employs transparency, trust, honesty and integrity in her practice and in the therapeutic relationship.

Top Rated Answers
March 4th, 2016 8:49pm
Sit down and have a nice talk with your partner, allow them to understand how you feel and talk through it.
March 5th, 2016 4:30am
One could try to express their concerns to their partners, talk to them about their worries. They could also talk to a mental health profession, or someone to give them some help.
March 6th, 2016 10:19pm
Communicate with your partner. Communication is the key to a great relationship. Without this we tend to overthink negative things.
March 9th, 2016 8:36am
Remember that the other person is human too. They will make mistakes and also have things that bother them. Instead of overthinking, rather talk honestly with your partner about your feelings and expectations and allow them the same courtesy.
March 9th, 2016 6:06pm
To stop overthinking in relationships reassure yourself. What ever your thinking about try and reassure yourself with things like "Is this really true?" "Am I overthinking this?" and ect.
March 12th, 2016 7:23pm
Talk to your significant other about what is concerning you. Oftentimes we overthink things when we don't communicate openly.
March 13th, 2016 11:49pm
You can stop overthinking thinks by telling yourself everything will run out smoothly and everything will go as planned.
March 16th, 2016 2:44pm
sometimes overthinking is a big part of some of us but we tend to learn to deal with things in a different way try doing something positive together or talking more about any issues you have in stead of thinking..
March 18th, 2016 8:59am
Just stop. Mind wants a complicated way to stop overthinking, but just start acting spontaneously now and let the chips fall where they may. It can take courage, a trust in the grander scheme of things, and knowing that love is your very nature, whether it seems that way or not.
March 19th, 2016 11:18am
Learn how to expect less from a relationship and learn to trust your partner, love them and relax, get to know more about each other, with that you'll be overthinking less
March 20th, 2016 2:41pm
Very good question, distract yourself, keep yourself busy with other things all the time, all that time you spent thinking on someone... invest it on you and you will see eventually you do not need to overthink those things anymore
March 20th, 2016 2:57pm
It can be very easy to start overthinking things in any relationship because once emotion and time is invested, it can be very easy to have anxiety over losing the relationship, concerns in the relationship, and overall feelings of unease. Sometimes it's just a normal process that needs to be worked through with time and trust in the relationship. Open communication can start to break down the pattern of overthinking things. Being open with the other person can increase bonds of trust and start to replace the overthinking after awhile. Be patient with yourself. It takes time to learn other coping methods other than overthinking in situations. Give yourself the time and space you need while fostering that open communication and it will start to get easier over time.
March 30th, 2016 12:06pm
Tell yourself it's only your anxiety making these negative thoughts up. Often, anxiety makes you think in a negative way and affects your relationship. Try avoiding them and say that your trust your partner, focus on positive thoughts and try your best to ignore the negative ones.
March 31st, 2016 3:50am
Talk over things with your significant other. The more you talk it through, the less your mind wanders and the more calm you will be.
March 31st, 2016 10:57am
I think the best way to stop overthinking things in a relationship is trusting your significant other. Talking to them could be another thing, it helps not to overthink about certain things because you have security and less doubt that causes overthinking.
March 31st, 2016 1:54pm
A simple mantra..if it's meant to be it will happen you don't have to stress too much about it...if a relationship is not helping you grow then its not worth it...
March 31st, 2016 9:54pm
I know it can be hard, but a lot of things in a relationship are based on trust. If you don't trust your partner enough to have an open dialogue whenever you are worried about something, then there's a flaw in your relationship. People are often more likely to be open with you if you can show you trust them, and while it might be very, very hard at first, you have to count on the person you love to be honest with you most of the time. It's easier to ask outright and end a worry than to overthink it constantly until it could become a full blown fight!
April 1st, 2016 11:22pm
Just let it happen the way it's supposed to, If it isn't meant to be, allow it to end and vice versa
April 6th, 2016 11:23am
Just keep yourself busy with useful things. Stay Positive, Trust your partner and always try to find solution for problems.
April 7th, 2016 7:29pm
Overthinking is a very common thing to do. Whatever you're thinking about should be shared with your partner. They will understand and talk with you about it. If you hold in whatever you are thinking then that will only cause you more anxiety and nobody needs that.
April 14th, 2016 6:33am
First, pinpoint exactly what the cause of your overthinking is. Is it because you distrust your partner or is it because his or her actions? Once you know, try to identify why this is the case. Learning more about it can help you find possible solutions.
April 14th, 2016 4:46pm
Just think of other perspective - would you personally do the things you over think? We all know our partners so in a way we know how they will act in certain situation, so if we don't depend on the emotions that are at given moment, but try to think how our partners would act in a situation - it will be easier for us to rest.
April 15th, 2016 8:42pm
You can't stop overthinking things in a relationship because it's natural to overthink things in a relationship, after all, relationships are between two people who try to trust each other, and sometimes, you're not really entire sure what you should think or feel once you're in a relationship. The best advice I can give is to just all negative thoughts from entering, like assuming.
April 21st, 2016 6:22am
Set some time to yourself. Recognize when your thoughts are getting the best of you. Consciously stop yourself. Ask yourself why you feel this way. Find a distraction, refocus your thoughts. Talk to your partner about your feelings.
April 21st, 2016 5:18pm
Tell your partner how you feel. Talking to them can stop those things you are overthinking. A good partner will support you and will have nothing against you.
April 28th, 2016 6:41pm
Instead of internalizing your doubts, talk them over with your S.O. They will appreciate it much more than a later outburst that they did not know you were struggling with. Or they will admit that something is up and you can jump on the path to fixing things. xx
April 30th, 2016 1:36pm
First of all why overthinking it can lead you to think negative thoughts , try to adapt positive things and be happy and simply divert your mind .
May 1st, 2016 5:13am
you need to calm down and understand that you are perfect just the way you are. you dont have to be perfect for you significant other :)
May 4th, 2016 9:55am
Distract yourself doing something you like to do. Convince yourself that you are worthy and amazing regardless of whether they stick around or not. Try focusing on staying happy, that will help you AND the relationship. :) ❤
May 6th, 2016 2:25am
The best way to go about this is to try to give yourself some space from it by having separate activities or friends. If it is a serious matter though, please bring it up with your partner and discuss it.