How to stop overthinking things in a relationship?

206 Answers
Last Updated: 10/30/2019 at 1:57am
How to stop overthinking things in a relationship?
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
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Jannise McKamey-Bruell, LAPC

Counselor

I am a nonjudgmental counselor that employs transparency, trust, honesty and integrity in her practice and in the therapeutic relationship.

Top Rated Answers
jadaluv15
March 30th, 2018 10:30pm
Talk things out with your partner, stop yourself the moment you catch yourself over-analyzing your partner's behaviour.
Anonymous
April 4th, 2018 7:36am
Relationships are best dealt when you talk... Talking can reduce overthinking to an extent. At times we can feel that our significant other won't understand... But if we keep overthinking and not talk about it... things can get really complicated.
Anonymous
April 8th, 2018 8:55pm
recognize your worth and communicate your feelings to your partner :) chances are they feel the same emotions but don't want to say it.
gentleSun78
April 16th, 2018 8:53am
At first, ask yourself if anything of the things you overthink, can be somehow influenced or changed. Then do it promptly. If it can't be influenced or changed, then distract yourself from your overthinking by doing anything which interest you, but overthinking. Distracting yourself doesn't mean that you suppress your feelings - it only means that you don't overthink anymore and live more healthy.
amazingDreamer85
April 18th, 2018 1:45pm
Have an open discussion about anything on your mind, but make sure your partner knows you are exchanging ideas. Assumptions are usually linked to overthinking, therefore, bringing it out in the open removes overthinking and settles the matter, once you know your partners opinion, as well as your own on the matter
dustrose97
April 19th, 2018 5:55am
If there is something in your thoughts that keep coming back, and you notice that you are overthinking things, all you have to do is talk to your significant other about your worry. Usually, as you keep doing this, the worries and the overthinking eventually goes down until you feel confident and trusting of your partner.
electricLily13
April 20th, 2018 7:05am
You can start verbalising your thoughts and tell your partner about it. This may help you understand their perspective as well, and you will both strengthen your relationship.
Brittany8013
April 26th, 2018 9:21pm
It can be very hard to not overthink in a relationship. often times good communication can limit this, as will mindfullness.
Anonymous
April 28th, 2018 7:33pm
This is a very difficult question for me to even answer. But I will do my best to try and think there's over correctly although what I may say will not or may not affect anybody else or help anybody else in any way shape or form. For myself I try to find distractions even though they are super temporary it is a lot better to have that temporary moment that you constantly figure out what it is that I keep doing wrong why is it that things are not going the way they're supposed to that's causes me to think and think and rethink and rethink things over that causes more harm and damage to a relationship then trying to make a relationship blossom in a beautiful way.
courageousMelody48
April 29th, 2018 7:58am
Be honest and open to deal with important thoughts and feelings. This is best done in the moment or when experiences are still raw.
braveTouch10
May 5th, 2018 2:54am
Always think about reality. Never assume things .and don't talk to people who want to break your relationship .
Mynameiskenneth
May 5th, 2018 4:42am
Many things (especially in relationships) are out of our control. Focus on yourself and let everything else fall into place.
ListeningLlama
May 5th, 2018 5:07am
Trust your partner. There usually isn't a deeper meaning to their actions other than their appreciation for you.
Anonymous
May 10th, 2018 6:41am
Its important to ask yourself whether what i am thinking has any basis in reality or if its simply in my Mind.If the issue is simply in your mind and has no basis in reality then you have to refrain yourself from thinking about it
delightfulShiny35
May 13th, 2018 6:19pm
Overthinking is leads to some extent lack of confidence on relationship. Faith and belief play very vital role in relationship. Just accept each other view with a view to respect each other.
resourcefulVision83
May 19th, 2018 9:36pm
A start is stop overthinking alone and talk with your significant other about how your feeling. When you don't completley understand it yourself so your mind can let it out and let them explain and help and that leaves them room to help reassure you.
UntilThen
May 24th, 2018 10:23pm
If you find yourself overthinking things in a relationship, it can really help to communicate with your partner more about your worries. Things like worrying you may have done something wrong, or wondering if they were paying attention to something going on with you, are things that are much more easily resolved with communication than through any other avenue. If that doesn't help, you may also want to try to work with your partner in affirming you that things are okay.
Anonymous
May 27th, 2018 11:48am
Sometimes, people think of others more than they think of themselves. What helped me in my darkest point of my relationship, was me pausing and thinking, "Am I still thinking of myself? Am I still well? Am I still happy?" Everyone needs a break once in a while and a chance to find themselves.
Arrow44
May 30th, 2018 2:26pm
For myself, open communication is key to avoid overthinking. My spouse is aware that I deal with anxiety, so when something is bothering me (or my spouse) we discuss it right away instead of letting it build up. Overthinking is often a result of unanswered questions and the only way I was able to stop it from escalating was to address my concerns before they consumed me. It's certainly not an easy conversation, but a necessary one. I'm not always wrong, but I'm not always right. It's important to remain as calm as possible by being receptive and open-minded to your partner and avoid accusatory language by explaining how something makes you feel instead of pointing fingers. Make it about yourself, not about them. This is how I handle overthinking. I am sure there are other methods , but this is what works for my spouse and I.
apositivepsych
May 31st, 2018 7:34am
'Actions speak louder than words.' Be cautious enough to observe yours and your partners actions. Many a times we believe what our wavering mind wants us to believe. But, the reality is different. In such circumstances, notice the actions and be firm enough to tell your mind that it is all in the head and the actions observed are different.
gentleBubbles83
June 8th, 2018 1:39am
In my own experience, it is best to address the overthinking with your partner. Simply address the conversation by stating that you have issues with overthinking and that you'd like to discuss it.
graceffa16
June 15th, 2018 5:52pm
focus on what’s right right for you, if you think your significant other is cheating and you’re on edge then maybe it isn’t right to be in a relationship like that
Anonymous
June 20th, 2018 9:17am
Conversation is key in a relationship. If you are worried, talk to your partner about it and figure out a way to get those worries away together
Anonymous
June 27th, 2018 5:47pm
If it's meant to be it will be, setting high expectations + being too optimistic = Sadness sometimes
Opalescentrose
July 1st, 2018 5:17am
Overthinking mighy be a sign that you lack trust in your partner. Communication can put your thoughts at ease
wonderfulStrawberry19
July 8th, 2018 7:32am
I usually try to relax and do yoga. I also listen to music or I write my concerns. Meditation and mindfulness is highly recommended with talking too
Anonymous
July 26th, 2018 11:07pm
I understand this one very much. Just talk to your partner about your problems and try to get their help or opinions on it. Once you have noticed you overreact you are on the right track!
Crystalline2Heavens
July 28th, 2018 7:11pm
They key is to calm your mind anytime you feel you are over thinking. I myself use meditation. The key is to find something to help you calm your mind. It could be a hobby, meditation, etc. It should be something healthy not destructive that helps you. This will allow you to grow into healthier thinking patterns.
Anonymous
July 29th, 2018 1:19am
Talk about those things with your partner, it will both put your mind at ease and communicating with your partner is very important for a healthy relationship.
Anonymous
August 2nd, 2018 1:43am
Surely, in a relationship, you should find someone sharing common grounds and life with yourself indeed and you should always trust your partner since thatis the base of a healthy relationship.