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How to stop thinking about a guy who dumped you or is bad for you?

109 Answers
Last Updated: 01/24/2022 at 8:34pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Andrea Tuck, LCPC

Licensed Professional Counselor

I tackle and discuss a multitude of social and emotional health issues. I have a belief that through empowerment and non-judgmental support clients' can thrive.

Top Rated Answers
Skira
July 6th, 2016 10:53pm
Maybe accepting the fact and letting yourself think those thoughts, but without really clinging to it, could help you achieve peace on the matter. The feelings won't melt away, but you can learn to get past hurtful moments over time.
RobVL
July 8th, 2016 4:48pm
Your focus should be on yourself. What I mean by this is that you have to love yourself by practicing being aware, accepting and sticking it out with your own personal goals and commitments. Doing this opens you to a world of beautiful possibilities.
Millichidulinas
July 13th, 2016 12:17pm
Try to focus on the things bad he did for you and say to yourself that he's not the right person, but remember that you can't control love.
Anonymous
July 20th, 2016 9:45am
First, reflect on why the guy dumped you or is bad for you. Second, think about was that a correct decision. Third, if you are certain that was the right decision, then you will stop soon. After all, he will gradually become unimportant. You can also engage yourself with certain hobbies or try socialising with other people. Maybe, as a result, you may find another guy you fell in love with.
rachtale
July 24th, 2016 11:45am
It's bad for you, they dumped you and yes that leaves an impact but you can't stay on that one guy forever when there's 7 billion other people on Earth. Stop listening to those breakup songs and make some time for just yourself.
alexsws
July 26th, 2016 3:49pm
You make a list of the pros and cons, and if the cons outweigh the pros then he's bad. Then you look at all the negativity he has released on your life
Anonymous
August 3rd, 2016 5:07pm
Think about your own credibility, how you deserve more. You are a better person and your life deserves more.
Anonymous
August 3rd, 2016 8:54pm
Try to stay bus. Usually if you are focussed on other things, your mind will not be set on the breakup or on your negative emotions about the situation
Anonymous
August 5th, 2016 2:14pm
Give yourself the time you deserve. Spend time with family and friends. And in time the thoughts of your ex will go away.
steelnerve
August 5th, 2016 8:03pm
Look for a more deserving candidate, to be honest. But not before being a bit self loving first. Involve in a self improvement activity, or even better make it a habit. I feel that its important to have self-worth before stepping in to the waters again.
Anonymous
August 5th, 2016 8:56pm
Hang out with some friends, engage in activities, work-therapy, and generally things that will get your mind off of that guy.
TheGlovedOne
August 6th, 2016 9:26pm
Remember, it didn't work out. If you don't, you will only remember the past. However, the past is over. That can no longer be a reality. I know it can be hard, but take it step by step. Such as, step one is to completely stop mentioning him to your social circle.
Lissa4814
August 6th, 2016 11:59pm
There are so many other things in life, so you can concentrate on them. Besides, life isn't about this one guy who doesn't appreciate you. You'll find someone better and be happy.
Anonymous
August 7th, 2016 12:19pm
Distraction works in the early stages.. And remember you have to keep yourself safe.. So that being the priority you can focus on yourself and move on..
quastinephoenix123
August 7th, 2016 11:03pm
Find support by keeping your friends close and talk about this problem with your close friends. And of course! DO NOT or at least TRY NOT to think that there was something wrong with you and that is the only reason he dumped you...everyone has their own preferences and maybe he had something different in mind so try to understand from his perspective and don't think it was your fault, don't worry! Maybe this happened for a reason so that you'll find someone better! Also, socialize and go out more...like go for a walk or animal shelter, or malls and stuff. Try to divert your mind and think of other things, there is so much to enjoy in this world :) Try to let go and have some fun.... Now if someone is bad for you, please try to think about yourself, YOU ARE IMPORTANT. I know it can be hard to let someone go, but respect yourself.
Ashiya
February 7th, 2017 7:24am
You can distract yourself with your friends, music or even activities. Not thinking about them is very hard but even just thinking about them or why you loved them can be a better alternative to why they left or how they're bad for you.
Anonymous
June 19th, 2018 12:18am
you may find it helpful to hang out with friends or do things you love. it will take your mind off of him and you’ll be able to focus on your hobbies
Silas1014
September 28th, 2020 8:21am
I know your feeling. I think that happend to everyone sometime in there life's. I know you probably heard it it and don't wanna hear it right now. Time. Time heals everything and it's so true. You can boost the progress if you distract yourself. Don't look at his social media Profils and try avoid seeing him in real life (if that is possible). And go outside. Meet new people! And you will see, you will forget him in no time! I know that it's hard to believe such things in these kind of situations. Just try to do new exciting stuff :) Take care
Anonymous
January 24th, 2022 8:34pm
I am very sorry to hear that this happened to you. Hmm, well I can't give exact advice because I have not been in your exact position. However, I was in a similar position, I tried focusing on personal growth and self love. It helped to occupy my mind and promoted positive thoughts , gradually thoughts of the person lessens and when you do think of them it is not to think of them but rather of the experience and how far you have come and how much you have grown. I hope that this helps and that you know that it will get better because you are a strong and amazing person.