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If people find out I am anxious, won't they think I'm incompetent, stupid or untrustworthy?

29 Answers
Last Updated: 08/21/2018 at 4:00am
1 Tip to Feel Better
Moderated by

Kajsa Futrell, RTC


I specialise in respectfully helping people navigate their way through trauma and relationship issues. The adversities in our life can actually transform us.

Top Rated Answers
November 25th, 2014 6:48pm
Anxiety is natural. It is something that every person experiences at some point in his/her life. Many can sympathize with feeling anxious. If someone claims otherwise (proclaims incompetence, etc), they are just bluffing by trying to seem immune to anxiety. Just accept that being anxious is natural and focus on how to best manage or overcome your personal anxiety.
December 29th, 2014 10:02pm
I won't lie. There sometimes is a stigma against anxious behavior. What I do is just go about my business, even when I do look and feel nervous. Because by doing that, I can prove to those people that I can look anxious and still be a good person, a hard worker, an effective, competent human being. And just by persevering, I'm showing the world that my merits outweigh my quirks. By the way, being and looking anxious is NOT a failing. It is a minor quirk of your nature. Embrace it, but don't let others define you by it.
January 2nd, 2015 10:20pm
Not at all! Honestly, I think it is the contrary because it takes bravery to tell someone and trust to go through life with anxiety. Trust in yourself.
November 24th, 2014 5:10pm
I ask myself this question all the time; but I've found that the answer is constantly no. The majority of my friends and family have responded with grace and understanding, and want to know how they can help me, rather than treating me poorly because of what I'm dealing with. The people in my life who have reacted poorly and treated me wrongly because of my anxiety have, honestly, hurt me. Sometimes that holds me back, but I'm learning to accept that not everyone will understand, and focus on the positive: there ARE people who treat me well, and they love me.
November 24th, 2014 7:11pm
I think that a large part of anxiety is a fear of how people might perceive you. One way to start challenging this fear is understanding your anxiety and not being ashamed of it.
November 26th, 2014 9:52pm
Most people deal with some level of anxiety at some point in their lives, so it's more likely that others will empathize with this feeling rather than judge you negatively for it. Also, worrying about what others think will serve only to make you more anxious! People generally notice much less about other people's emotions than you would expect.
December 1st, 2014 5:32am
not at all, everyone at some stage feels anxious about something. you are not alone. People will admire you if you are able to get through your anxiety. They will realise that you are strong and courageous and not stupid!
December 7th, 2014 9:49am
Only the small minded and not understanding people would think something as silly as that. I have anxiety myself, anxiety is nothing to be ashamed about, and it does not mean that you are incompetent, stupid, or untrustworthy. Anxiety has nothing to do with that. :)
December 14th, 2014 7:38pm
Sometimes, when people don't know what anxiety is like, they may hold prejudices against you. However, I've found most people by now have known someone with depression and/or anxiety and have a general idea of what it's about. If they don't, it may be that because they know you their prejudice changes because they realize you aren't like the stereotype in their head. If you find them hurtful or judgmental, it may help to talk to them about it if you're comfortable and/or give them some resources about anxiety disorders so they can better understand. If they are not significant people in your life and you think they may take it badly, you can chose to try to ignore them, educate them, or not tell them. It's up to you.
December 22nd, 2014 4:24am
Anxiety means that you may worry and stress a lot. Everyone worries or stresses from time to time in their life, so most people will be sympathetic to your anxiety because they can relate. If you feel they don't understand, perhaps you can check out the 7 cups anxiety self help guide, and find a positive way to explain your anxiety to them.
December 24th, 2014 3:25am
Yes, because there is a stigma attached to mental illness. Mental illness isn't viewed very seriously and is given a sign that people are "incompetent, stupid or untrustworthy." But those people are wrong. The people who truly support you won't say that.
May 24th, 2015 2:47am
They can sense it and take advantage of your perceived weakness rather than just being who you are and being respectful of you.Tricky. Those that are kind get it and are positive when responding to one's anxiety.
June 11th, 2015 8:22am
No. If people find out you are anxious, chances are some of them will recognize their own feelings in you! Everyone feels anxious at some time or another. If you are open about your anxiety, someone will be able to help you through it.
June 30th, 2015 9:49pm
Anxiety is a medical condition, and should be taken with the same seriousness as any other. How other people respond isn't really up to you (it depends on the people in question; different people react differently, depending on their maturity), but you can do your part in explaining away any misconceptions about your anxiety or answering any questions about it should those that you decide to tell have them.
November 9th, 2015 5:52pm
No. Everyone in their life becomes anxious. Whether it be worrying about a test tomorrow, a job, family matters, everyone gets anxious. We're only human after all.
December 29th, 2015 8:46am
No they won't, because it is absolutely normal to be anxious and it happens to all the people so they won't think that way about you
December 29th, 2015 10:20am
We are social but independent. Hence,We shouldn't be ashamed to be ourself.We are unique no matter whatsoever diversities we emerge from
January 4th, 2016 6:27pm
No. Just remember: the people who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind. If you found out that someone you knew suffered from anxiety, wouldn't you want to help them rather than degrade them?
February 16th, 2016 11:29pm
I've never had a person call me any of those things when I explain my anxieties. Most people are understanding and supportive you just have to give them a chance.
July 5th, 2016 8:55pm
Absolutely not. Everyone feels anxious, whether it be because of school, work, etc. Clearly, not everyone has anxiety to the point of anxiety disorder, but you will be able to find people who can understand and help you with whatever you're going through
October 25th, 2016 5:24pm
Yes they will think we re incompetemt, stupid, untrustworthly... because anxious happens to people has little experience, doesnt understand (stupid), and untrustworthy because they doesnt looks profesional.
December 12th, 2016 1:58am
No, I don't think so. It might be hard to understand but feeling anxious and doubting yourself, I think, is completely normal for anyone to experience. If people think that way about you, you are best off without them.
July 18th, 2017 11:38am
Most people will not think any of those things. When my friends found out, they told me that this was something that happens in a lot of people and I'm not alone.
October 16th, 2017 7:18am
I came out and talked about my anxiety with my friends, now they support me, and help me to achieve my best. I'm sure that people will only want to help, and not think less of you.
November 14th, 2017 3:16pm
A lot of people are worried about people learning they have anxious tendencies, or struggle with Anxiety, and it is a completely common, and very natural fear. However, majority of the time, our loved ones will seek ways to help when our anxiety increases. You can have a good sit down talk with those close to you, and explain that it does not affect your ability to function on a day to day basis, it simply means some tasks may be more difficult, but not impossible.
January 8th, 2018 3:25pm
When people find out you are anxious they may be more considerate of your needs and will often times lend a helping hand wherever it is needed. They should not think you are incompetent in any way, this is not your fault.
February 27th, 2018 6:57pm
Some might, but you'd be surprised at how many people are accepting of it. There are good people out there; I know it's difficult to believe, but not everyone is going to have a negative reaction to it. Sure, some people might think that way, mostly because they don't care about or don't understand the issue, but there are just as many people, if not more, that will be pretty accepting about it.
April 3rd, 2018 7:44pm
Anxiety is a common emotion that everyone goes through! And if you've met someone who has said they haven't they're most-likely lying. Being anxious does not make you stupid, incompetent or untrustworthy :)
August 21st, 2018 4:00am
Not at all. Anxiety has nothing to do with being stupid or untrustworthy. So many people have anxiety and they r amazing people which im sure you are as well. Don’t doubt yourself because of your anxiety and don’t overthink. Overthinking can get the best of us a lot of the time especially for someone struggling with anxiety. This is understandable but you need to see that having nerves and anxiety does not make you any different than someone who does not struggle with it. You can be the most trustworthy, smart and caring person but have incredibly bad anxiety.