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Is it hard to think critically about something you love?

145 Answers
Last Updated: 04/17/2020 at 2:38am
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Ken Thom, LPC

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I believe that emotional dys-regulation is the underlying cause of all mental health challenges. I help people regulate their emotions and then begin their healing journey

Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
December 26th, 2018 3:27pm
I definitely think so. This is one of the many reasons abusive relationships are so hard to leave, because at one point the person being abused may have had a loving relationship with the abuser. This makes it so the abusee have a harder time seeing what the abuser is doing to them because they want to believe in the person they used to love. In a more toned down example, with my best friend (who I love very dearly) sometimes I overlook some of her negative traits and get a bit blinded by the good. Sometimes it seems like the people we love can do no wrong, but it's important to both advocate for yourself when needed and acknowledge all the parts of someone, good and bad.
JoseMystic
January 26th, 2019 6:51am
We as humans are quite biased towards what we love, it's natural to be clouded by the thought process in regards to any matters relating to something we love. Emotions get the best of us and we allow emotions to be the decision maker, which often may be confusing and illogical. When the subject arises and decision making comes into play, logic should be the method utilized, if we truly love something we'd want the best for it and not the worst, it becomes however the opposite if we don't think critically, it is for that reason we MUST think critically specially if it's about something we love.
llola3
February 7th, 2019 8:56am
you as a human being are going to think critically of everything your eyes view even if you don’t realise. it’s part of being a person. no matter how much you love someone/ something you will always have your favourite and least favourite things you like about them in the back of your head. there is nothing wrong with being critical about people / situations / objects it’s part of me, you , your neighbor , the person you walked past coming down the road i, myself have thought the same exact thing as what your question is talking about. No it’s not hard to thing critically about something you love, it’s human nature. i’m so glad you reached out to a Listener on 7 Cups today to help
windfox3
February 14th, 2019 9:13pm
Thinking critically is a natural human habit. We tend to lean towards critical thinking all the time - and unfortunately, critical thought can lead to discontent as we find flaws with what we love. Critical thinking is most healthy and most helpful only if it leads to constructive action and healthy problem solving. For example, we can critically think about our pets. Let's say a dog which we love has a bad habit of chewing our stuff. We think critically about how to help the dog appease its need to chew by providing appropriate toys. Thus we do not resent the dog for chewing - but embrace the pet's characteristics and support it in a healthy, non-destructive manner.
Blynng
March 8th, 2019 8:00am
Generally, that would depend on how willing you are to accept that what you love may not be perfect. Critical thinking is not inherently negative; rather, it is analytical. This means you will consider the areas in which this thing you love may be imperfect, may need to grow, where it may not be exactly the way you wish. It can be difficult to consider things in this way, but one could argue that building this skill is incredibly important for a successful life. Developing a healthy life does mean that you need to be able to consider the reality of things, rather than what you wish or want to see.
dxphne
March 28th, 2019 9:37am
I definitely feel like it is, yes. When you really love something it's hard to see the negative in it most of the time. That's also why people say that love makes blind, most of the time you won't notice the negative sides of the people you love, you're too busy thinking about all their good traits. In some way it sounds like a beautiful thing but it might be important to look at things in a more critical way though, especially with the risks of toxic relationships or any other toxic situations, like a toxic friendship.
generousSun57
March 29th, 2019 3:35pm
I think that analyzing anything that you love is incredibly difficult. When you love something, it is easy to look past or excuse all of its flaws. And this could apply to anything that you love like a person, your work, even yourself. While it is hard to think critically about something that you love, it is necessary so that we can be reasonable and responsible. If your head is in the clouds at all times, other aspects of life can worsen. I would say that it is about a good balance between practicality and romanticism. Balance always seems to be the key!
Inkbear0
March 30th, 2019 4:01pm
No, I am a pessimist, so I do not really think highly of a lot of things too much. I do know that I can and will think critically of many different things that I enjoy or love. Even if it seems perfect. There is no perfection in this world, I realized that long ago. But, listening to people really helps me, personally, I know that I am not perfect and that some people hate me. I am well aware of that. But I know that I have to keep strong for my family and friends. I know that I am never alone in this. Even if I can think critically of the things I love and care about. Not only am I something. I am something else.
Anonymous
April 21st, 2019 10:07am
To think critically about something you need to focus on its pros and cons. But if you love that something, emotions are implied, and logical thinking might be inhibited. Thus, thinking critically about something you love might definitely be hard, especially if you are an emotional person and/or feel like you can't control your emotions. Writing pros and cons on a piece of paper might help you because it forces you to consider both the good and the bad. Asking for opinions to other people might also help you to broaden your point of views. But remember: we are inclined to listen only to the bits that agree with our opinion. So make a conscious effort to consider even the opinions that disagree with yours!
playfulPalm95
April 24th, 2019 10:03pm
Yes. I believe it is, it all depends on the person and the thing as well as the circumstances. I think that if we are in love with something we have a tendency to only focus on that, rather than thinking critically about whether we should. It’s very easy for emotions to cloud our judgement, but that is natural, some people have an easier time seeing through these emotions to think critically, but some most stop and make an effort to think critically. Certainly having someone else to assist with thinking critically through emotions is a huge help, as they are not feeling the love and can help you with critical thinking!
secrethelp21
June 27th, 2019 11:45am
This is the most difficult problem I personally face in life. Thinking real and critical about something you want in life. Perhaps in other circumstances, other character traits would be easy, I would think real life, and I would not stick with objects. But I started my own battle, which is not even the least easy. I think realistically and not to tie up with objects. It's not easy at all. But a lot of books help me with books and I practice them. And there is improvement.And when I want something, I ask the question: Is it worth the thing in life?
Anonymous
June 27th, 2019 6:47pm
Sometimes you can think too critically about something you love, if you are a perfectionist. You can pick it apart until there is nothing left. "Thinking objectively" might describe better what you need to do, perhaps. When you find yourself being too critical, best to step back and take a few breaths, and maybe do something else for awhile before you return to it. However, if the activity in question is something that requires your full transcendent attention, some good thing that you sink into and lose yourself in before you rise to the surface again, maybe it's not important whether or not you "think critically" about it.
Hanaa00
July 11th, 2019 12:17am
This really depends on the context. However, thinking critically of something we love can sometimes be the best thing that can be done, and for some people it’s very easy. For others though, it can be difficult whenever there are emotions in conflict with reason and logical thinking... for instance, it can get tricky when it comes to romantic relationships, because most people who are in love tend to base their decisions entirely off of that, while they might ignore some logical warnings in the process, even some potential red flags. So in such situations, it is almost impossible.
MissLisa
August 8th, 2019 12:43pm
Often whenever we are in love we can find it difficult to see faults as we tend to love warts and all. It may be helpful to try and take yourself out of that situation and look at it from someone else's point of view. How would they feel? Would they see things that you do not? Or perhaps things that you see, they would consider them more negatively than you? Just keep in mind that thinking critically comes at a price as it can often lead to overthinking and causing problems which were not there to begin with.
entropysveryown
September 8th, 2019 10:14pm
Thinking critically about something you love is only going to be helpful. It would be a great disservice to you to only look at the favorable. Critical thinking allows us to look deeper into the things we love which helps to strengthen our relationship to that thing, Critical thinking is a necessary step to understanding the things we love at their core. While this is necessary, it does not mean it will be easy. Sometimes we discover things we never knew to be true and that can be a big adjustment and it can take some getting used to. Difficult thinking can lead to great discoveries but also painful ones, it's important to remember both are okay.
politeMagic1163
September 27th, 2019 3:45am
It is not really all that hard to think critically about something I love because what is love without constructive criticism? If I love someone, but I never tell them when something is bothering me, they never will know it’s bothering me in the first place, and therefore will never fix it. If they don’t fix it, I will continue to be bothered by it. If it continues to bother me, I won’t want to be around them anymore. My Stepmom always says, “Teach people how to treat you. If you never tell them, they will never know to fix it, and that’s just counterproductive.”
Anonymous
November 8th, 2019 12:48pm
I think that often when it comes to the people we love, we tend to see things through rose tinted glasses. We love these people so much that it's hard for us to imagine that they could ever do something wrong. But I know that the people I love aren't perfect and I have the ability to understand when they do something wrong that it is wrong. This, I feel, is especially true for family members and sometimes friends as well. They can mean the world to you, but it often reaches a point where you realize that they aren't all that you want them to be and it becomes easy to think critically about them.
Sagettarius
December 14th, 2019 10:07am
I think that it can be very difficult to think critically about something or someone you love. We have always invested a lot of emotion in the things and people we love, so criticism is not something which comes easily because it questions our judgement in the first place, as well as our commitment to it or them. Balanced criticism requires a pretty neutral viewpoint from where we can weigh up the pros and cons and make a judgement based on them. Because of our emotional investment, any negative criticism can seem to be a betrayal of the person or thing we love, and suspending that feeling and acknowledging that one's evaluation is correct takes a lot of practice. On the other hand, positive criticism, or praise is very straightforward.
Pinkpunk96
January 3rd, 2020 2:58pm
Yes ofcourse it can be! When you think about something you love you want to see it through the best lenses that you can! It can be hard to look at it critically, try seeing it from another persons point of view as this can help looking from the outside in and gaining another perspective other than your own. Love is blind and it is so hard to see bad things! Like if someone says bad about a family member you shut them down straight away because you don’t look at the bad in them because you love them so much
FrostWire
January 9th, 2020 4:01am
Hi; I'm Frostwire. the question you've asked is a very great question, but i must know why you have asked it. Love is an infinite thing like some forms of martial arts. It requires time and interaction with parts of life itself. I must ask myself the question: Is the thing i love worth the time that i put into it? Can the answer be as simple as saying No? Is saying Heck no the wrong way to answer? Is the question a valuable question? Does on need to think about what they love before they answer? Has this question ever been answered with actions that show that one loves something? Again i thank you for reaching out with your question; I'm Frostwire your supporting personnel.
Anonymous
January 16th, 2020 10:51am
It is hard but when needed you must think in that way. Sometimes its necessary . You may think that oh no i camt do that i love them but you have to sometimes and when you need to you must, be it critically thinking or talking. You must always be ready for any moment in your life. Think about the doctors who have to operate their own relatives. They must be so scared but they do it anyway, right? So you should also not hesistate from doing so, it is hard but yeah when needed you should. Hope this was helpful.
BabyyTyy10
February 22nd, 2020 9:10am
Yes because once you love something/someone, you will ignore their/it's flaws and only focus on the good. Sometimes you may not even see the bad at all, so it's pretty difficult to think critically. But sometimes you do need to take a step back and look at the thing you love critically. The flaws make up the thing/person, it's who they truly are, because to be truthful we're all made up of flaws not one person is perfect. Criticism is not always bad, I know, I hated getting criticism and used to take it negatively but if you think about these critics will improve you as a person and bring out the best in an individual or thing. It's hard, but sometimes it's for the best.
Anonymous
April 5th, 2020 10:56pm
it depends on the person and how they have been feeling lately as each person is unique and is going through different issues in life. loved things hold great value in life and we have to think as critically as possible to ensure that we are rational. for me, it is hard but it may not be for someone else. i suggest that we try to make it as easy as possible as difficult things make us feel less logical and completely stress us out and drain us. so no, i cannot say if it is hard for everyone. it can only be decided by the person
allyswift
April 16th, 2020 10:01pm
Um, I dont know, its like when we are closed to someone like when we have spend a lot of time, we happen to know them better than we knew before, but its just that we dont want to accept that they are wrong, we are just in denial to protect ourselves because then wed have to think whether its worth staying with them, we are afraid of loosing and more than ever we are afraid to be the one who ends it. We justify everything wrong with but we love them, but they did this for us, but they care about us.
lifegivesulemons
April 17th, 2020 2:38am
To some circumstances, it is. But everything has flaws. I LOVE food but thinking critically, it has alot of calories. I LOVE to run but the motivation sometimes gets me in this grey zone of me not wanting to get out of bed. I LOVE my significant other but sometimes we have arguments that question why I like him this much when he hurts me. It is all about perspective. I feel like if you're really caught up in the love, it is hard to see it. I know this problem says 'something', but studies have shown that when in love with some significant other, you begin to dismiss flaws that were seen before cause your brain focuses more on why you love that person.