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Should I tell my husband I cheated on him?

98 Answers
Last Updated: 01/04/2022 at 1:49pm
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United States
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Psychologist

I have over 9 years of clinical experience, specialize in anxiety, and am passionate about my work. My approach is collaborative, empathic, supportive, and goal-oriented.

Top Rated Answers
StephSnake1582
April 3rd, 2016 5:50pm
It depends. If you feel like you have enough trust in him that he won't go off on you. But honestly is the best policy in a relationship. It also depends If it was a one time thing or ongoing. It's completly up to you and how strong your relationship is
cupcake1234
April 3rd, 2016 5:13am
I think you should. Because honestly, if there is something to save then this is the only way for you to save it. And if there isn't, then you might as well move on. In either case, don't doubt your character.
Anonymous
April 3rd, 2016 1:39am
Yes you should. Although it may be hard, secrets in a relationship don't usually work out so well.
YellowDaffies
April 1st, 2016 9:32pm
Only you can answer what the best choice is. For any decision, can you live with who you and your past actions and be comfortable with yourself? Imagine the scenarios and how they might play out for you, and for you husband, if you tell him or don't tell him. If he finds out later, or if he never knows. How would you feel about yourself and what do you imagine your life would be in those situations?
disclousure
April 6th, 2016 1:54am
Yes, relationships should be built off trust and honesty. He deserves to know, whether or not he did something to provoke you to cheat.
couragetogo
March 27th, 2016 3:36pm
Honesty is important. Walk in his shoes for a few steps and ask yourself if you would like to know. It may not be the most comfortable way but it is less harmful then lying and having him developing trust issues by himself until they get approved when he finds it out.
Anonymous
March 25th, 2016 11:45am
Yes, you should tell you husband that you cheated on him . Not telling him could make things worse for you .
Anonymous
March 24th, 2016 2:16am
I would be honest and open with him. Honesty is always the best policy. Wouldnt you want the same honesty if he did that?
JoyfulForestRain
March 20th, 2016 1:59am
That is up to you to make that decision. Do what is best for you and those around you. Think about how you would feel if you were in the position he was in. Would you tell you?
Anonymous
March 11th, 2016 5:06am
Yes, it's something unforgivable that can be done. It'll only hurt him more if you don't . He will feel at least some remorse from you actually telling him.
TaylorSeth
April 24th, 2016 3:21am
I think it would be something that would be rather important to share, as it would show honesty. In a relationship, such as marriage, honesty is key.
0HarmanGarcha
January 4th, 2022 1:49pm
I think the truth is more important than anything. By hiding it you continue cheating on him. By the way, you know better what to do because you have a history with your husband and know the worst scenario even gonna happen. There is also a possibility that he can find out the truth from somewhere else and it is gonna be more dangerous as he will not have any faith that he can be assured you are not lying anymore to him and in this process, you will get no chance to defend yourself but you will just borrow some time.
Anonymous
March 2nd, 2021 5:03am
having that open communication with your partner is key. He will not agree with the decision that you caused you to cheat. I believe he will respect you more for honesty. He will need to regain your trust. it will be a long process to over come ... think if he cheated on you how would you feel? would want him to tell you the truth? Let your husband decide what he wants to do. Your partner pain must be prioritized.
Anonymous
July 16th, 2018 2:08pm
I recommend working that out with a professional therapist first if you want to salvage the relationship. Every situation is different.
Anonymous
June 26th, 2018 4:13am
If you are not feeling guilty then it's OK but if you are feel that you were wrong then you need to tell him. Telling him is not the only thing you need to give him the reason what made you do that to make your relationship more strong. Also make sure you don't cheat him again.
Pugcanisegosum
January 8th, 2018 5:36am
I think you should tell your husband if you actually cheated on him. Telling the truth sooner hurts less than having to let them find out themselves or lying to them.
Anonymous
February 7th, 2017 5:36pm
Well, for starters you should. Maybe you could break it to him slowly, I am sure he would listen to you. He would be a tad disappointed, angry but he will understand.
Anonymous
October 17th, 2016 1:11am
Of course! Honesty is one of the most important factors in a relationship. If you ever cared about him, he deserves to know.
amiableBeauty78
September 27th, 2016 7:09pm
What does your heart tells you,if you think it's the right thing you should do it.follow your heart and do what's best for you and your husband
Anonymous
April 8th, 2016 5:07am
trust is very important in relationships. He may find out eventually, so hearing it from you is probably better than hearing it from anyone else.
peacefulIris56
April 23rd, 2016 2:58pm
That really depends on how you want to handle the situation. You should always be open and honest with your spouse, but on the other hand, it could tear you family apart. You do what you think is right.
Anonymous
April 21st, 2016 4:10pm
Yes. In a relationship, honesty is one of the most important things, and neglecting to tell him that you cheated will only make things worse when he inevitably finds out in the future. Be upfront about it and accept that he will most likely be upset with you.
Anonymous
April 13th, 2016 6:51pm
Honesty might work out. Just always remember that time may give weigh to the problem. It's all about faith and forgiveness. It's always been faith, He might forgive you for the reason that he loves you and he married you.
Nahsha
April 13th, 2016 3:17am
It would be best. I recommend doing so instead of him finding out. It'll make you feel guilty if you don't already feels so now. If you tell him sooner, maybe you'd be able to work things out. There's nothing more painful than be cheated on and never being told right away.
Anonymous
April 11th, 2016 3:13pm
Yes because you committed adultery, & The least that you can do is tell your husband that you cheated. It's the right thing to do whether we like it or not. Admitting our wrongs no matter how old we are, is and always will be the right thing.
Nosh
April 10th, 2016 3:20am
It comes down to you. Personally I think it's his right to know about what has happened, but if you swear to never go against him again, ignorance could mean bliss for him.
Anonymous
April 9th, 2016 7:39pm
Sincerity is the basis of all relationships. Explain your reasons good and sincere . If he loves you, he will forgive you ;)
Anonymous
April 9th, 2016 6:39am
Your husband deserves to know the truth, there will be consequences but it's necessary to be honest in the relationship.
Anonymous
February 21st, 2016 2:56pm
Yes, you definetly should. You probably feel very bad about it and it's better to just be honest about it.
WiseOldManCounseling
March 3rd, 2016 1:39pm
Only if you believe it will bring you closer together, or if your moral code necessitates confessing.