What should I do if people think I am lying?
Last Updated: 10/29/2021 at 3:26pm
Jennifer Fritz, LMSW, PhD
Clinical Social Work/Therapist
Day to day life can be stressful and overwhelming and my strength is assisting my clients in a supportive, empowering and practical manner.
Top Rated Answers
Often in my life, I've been misunderstood. People have thought I was lying when clearly I wasn't. Sometimes, the truth is so baffling that it's easier to believe that someone is lying. Or maybe people get so stubborn in their beliefs that they can never accept an alternative view. So they think you're lying. Hence, if people think I'm lying, I've figured that the best response is just to let them. Let them think you're lying...because it doesn't matter. You know you're telling the truth, you have a clear conscience. It's them who need to broaden their minds. It's them who need to see beyond their hardcore beliefs. People will always believe what they want to believe; trying to convince them hardly works. So, if they see it on their own that you're not lying, well and good, and if not, then feel sorry for them and move on with your life. :)
I would try to support my points with my own experience. I would also tell them that it's ok for them to not trust me and I understand their suspicion but to listen to what I have to say.
This happens to me too. A lot of times when I tell someone something about myself that is really cool or unusual, I am afraid they will think I am lying, so I try to seem like I'm not lying, which probably makes it appear more like I'm lying. I still haven't gotten over this completely, but it helps me to tell myself, "I am not lying, so they will have no reason to think I am lying". That gives me confidence in what I say and helps me not think about it so much. I also feel ashamed if I tell someone something that I thought was true but is actually not, but I know now that if the person finds out that what I told them isn't true, they will realize that I just had a misunderstanding of the situation. The other person won't focus that much on what you say compared to all the other things that they think about in their day, so it is unlikely that they will fixate on that situation and conclude that you are a liar.
Ask them why they think you're lying. Their belief is generated by something within themselves, not within you and if it is impacting upon your life, then it is something you need to draw out of them with conversation, so that you can work together to improve your relationship.
Be as clear and honest as you can. Let them do the rest. It is hard to be seen as a liar but if you did all you could to assure them, then it is or it is. The easier and ironically the hardest thing to do is not care. If you did that, props to you.
If people think that you are lying about something then they probably don't trust you or you have lied a lot in the past so they feel that they cannot trust you. You can try to earn their trust to get them to believe you or give them proof of it.
Just be truthful.... slowly they will realize that you are honest... lies cannot be hidden forever..
If you're telling the truth and others don't believe you then that is not your problem to handle. As long as you're being honest that's all that matters.
Are you? In either case, the truth will surface eventually. Some people may be pretty stubborn about accepting it or changing their opinion. Maintain your truth and remember that actions speak louder than words.
If people think you are lying you must find facts and evidence as to why you would not lie in your current situation. It is hard to face a situation where people you love or respect do not believe what you say or feel. I hope you only surround yourself with people who trust you, but there are certain situations where belief in your credibility is questioned. At these times you must find ways to confirm your side and support what you say or do. What you do to prove these things is up to you, but I can say that you should only do actions that are positive and not at all violent towards yourself or those involved.
It of course depends on the situation, stay true to yourself and carry the confidence of your truth with you in social situations. People can pick up on when you feel confident in your responses, and showing you are not fazed by others misconceptions can show a lot through your own character to those around you.
You do not always need to act to other people's thoughts about you. If you know that you are not lying, you shouldn't be worried about it and should not do anything. If the people that think you are lying are important to you, you could talk to them and ask them to explain their untrue beliefs.
Sometimes if that's what people think of you then don't surround yourself with people like that. If they think you're lying when you're not, then maybe you shouldn't be around them if they can't even trust you in the first place when maybe you haven't even done anything that would make them think that.
Let it go, it is their loss if they think you are lying, if they don't know you well enough to know you aren't then you don't need them in your life. If it is something that isn't all that important then let it go, no need to get defensive because that makes people think we are lying more.
Authenticity is both valued and respected in any relationship. If someone thinks you are lying, stay calm, and in a calm manner ask them why they feel you are lying. Both of you can walk thought the story and provide more details if needed. Sometimes these situations are communication based and being open and having an honest conversation is sometimes difficult but can help build trust.
Leave them. If you are speaking truth and still they don't believe you can give as many explanations as you want but they won't believe you.
Tell them clearly that you are not lying and make them believe it if you can do it by giving a feasible proof. But you shouldn't always try hard to make everyone believe you. Just take your closed ones in trust and ultimately when people see the results, they would start believing.
I would ask myself, why do they think I am lying? Have I done something in the past to make people distrust me? If the answer is yes, apologize, tell them that you understand it will take time to build back the trust you lost but that you are trying to change, and continue to be truthful. If the answer is no, ask yourself, what has happened to them to be distrustful, maybe someone has lied to them in the past and it has left them hurt, understand that people might've had bad experiences in the past and be patient with them trusting you. However, if someone won't believe you despite all your efforts and patience, think, do I want people in my life that don't trust me? Maybe it is time to distance yourself from people that accuse you from not telling the truth despite your efforts to continuously convince them otherwise. Being distrusted is never nice, but it is most important that you are truthful to yourself and that you know the truth.
Kindly explain to them how it makes you feel when they think you're lying. For example, "It makes me feel poorly about myself when people think I'm lying, when I'm really telling the truth." Also, explain to them that it would make you feel better if they listen and show compassion. Hope all is well.
You could communicate what you think and feel but ultimately as long as you know the truth that's all that matters. People are different so you won't be able to convince everyone but if you do the best that you can do in this situation then that is more than enough.
You trying to talk them into believing that you are saying truth would be pretty useless since these people clearly don't trust you. As hard as it might be, I think just ignore them. Just kindly say that you are not lying and then just don't do anything about it. Make it clear that you have said everything that there is to know about this subject. With time maybe, with you actions you will prove them wrong. But don't get too carried away by doing this on purpose. Just let them think whatever they want. You know that you are being an honest person and that is all that matters. Don't let them get to you.
If someone thinks you are lying, it is important to remember that you know the truth and all you can do is try to help others see the truth - you can only control your actions and reactions, you cannot control what someone else believes
It shouldn't matter what people think, only you know the truth and those who care about you should believe you that you are telling the truth. Those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.
Try not to care what other people think about you, you're the only one that really matters to yourself. Love yourself
If people think you're lying, that's their fault for not trusting you. Unless there is a way to prove that you're not lying, it will be hard to make them understand that you're not. The best thing to do is to not say anything and try to continue the conversation. If you keep trying to say you're not lying, nothing will change. If you give in to it and say "you know what, I am." that'll only fuel their belief and not trust you.
All you can do is be honest and prove to them it's sencere enough. Some people need more shown proof
You should prove your point and stand up for yourself and tell them I'm not lying if they don't trust you then prove your point.
Continue to tell my truth. There is nothing better than telling your feeling and facts. People will be people and not all will like or believe you, but if one stays strong minded everything will work out fine
Check and make sure your not. If your not, then tell them that you are telling the truth. If they choose not to believe you then they are worthy of your presence.
Let them think what they want to think. Atleast you know you're telling the truth and you are not lying
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