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Why am I nervous around my girlfriend?

275 Answers
Last Updated: 12/28/2019 at 3:28pm
Why am I nervous around my girlfriend?
★ This question about Anxiety was starred by a moderator on 5/12/2016.
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Melissa Strauss, LPC

Licensed Professional Counselor

I am client focused and believe everyone has a strength. I feel confident in seeing clients with generalized and social anxiety, depression and relational goals.

Top Rated Answers
June 21st, 2015 3:15am
Probably because you really like her and are scared of messing things up, but don't be! Girls love it when guys are all cute and nervous! Plus chances are you have no reason to feel this way anyway besides the fact that you really like her.
June 21st, 2015 6:33pm
You can be nervous for a number of reasons, it could be simply because you like them so much, or it could be for another reason that you don't want to mess up around her
June 24th, 2015 7:36am
This is normal :) It means that you don't want to screw up around her. You care what she thinks I you so much.
June 24th, 2015 9:02am
Are you sure you're not having any stress or depression? But I am really sure, you're nervous because you really like her.
June 26th, 2015 4:12am
Well, there are few people we let close to know us on a basic level -- and even fewer we allow even closer to know who we are as people intimately. Things not even someone living in the same house as us would necessarily know about us. And then, there's more at stake- because, you /want/ your girlfriend to like you .. and to continue to like you.
July 4th, 2015 10:22pm
People are nervous in all types of different situations for all types of different reasons. So it could be a lot of different things. Maybe you just want to impress her, and it's putting some pressure on you? A lot of people feel the pressure to make these situations perfect but in reality they don't have to be. When the pressure to make things perfect begins disturbing your life you could have an anxiety disorder and may need to do more to try and control it, like using coping skills, talking to a listener here, or even seeking professional help for starters. It's possible your anxiety is coming from something else as well, but it would help more to know your situation to know what might be causing it exactly.
July 5th, 2015 8:45am
There's various of reasons. Did you do something wrong that you know she'd disapprove? Did you suspect something she did? Ultimately, talk to your partner to resolve your nervousness.
January 2nd, 2016 5:18am
If you always feel nervous around your girlfriend, there's a chance you haven't established a close enough relationship to feel comfortable around her. Do everything you can to make your relations with her more like the relations you have with people you're comfortable with. This may include sharing stories, spending more time together, or getting to know each other on a more personal level. Communication is key! With time and care, you'll get to be more comfortable with her, and it will strengthen your relationship immensely.
January 2nd, 2016 3:17pm
You wanna impress her, but you do not know how to do it. You fear you might do something embarassing.
January 30th, 2016 11:52pm
You dont want to mess up in front of her, you want to impress her which is okay. It's totally normal to be nervous around the one you love.
March 14th, 2016 11:44pm
That's a question only you hold the answer to. There are various triggers that can cause your anxiety. Try to pay attention to what exactly is causing you to be nervous around your girlfriend. Speak wth her about the issue as well.
March 20th, 2018 4:23pm
You can be nervous around your girlfriend because they may done something that concerned you, they said something they shouldn't have said, or even you may think something bad will come out when your around them.
June 4th, 2018 3:52pm
You internally some times feels whether I deserve her. Or you might have slight anxiety whether she will like my behavior today / in this circumstances
July 24th, 2018 12:28pm
It could be because you're worried about being judged by her. If you're constantly worried you're going to do something she doesn't like, you feel like you could lose her. But of course that's not true. If she really truly cares about you, the little quirks won't matter to her. She'd be one to keep around.
May 21st, 2015 8:21pm
Being in a relationship is a big step in life. Your goal is to try to connect with a person that you really don't know all that well, and find the commonalities between the two of you. That requires a lot of talking, and spending time together participating in activities. Having a girlfriend means that you have to also give a little piece of yourself to another person. All of this can cause a bit of anxiety until a comfort level is reached. This may take some time depending on how much you both open up to each other, and the type of activies you do together. For example, going to the movies is a great way to spend time together, but it doesn't really allow that 1 on 1 face time to really get to know one another. The nervousness will eventually subside once a comfort level is reached!
June 5th, 2015 3:33pm
Some people are nervous around their girl friend because maybe they think she will up and leave or maybe she won't like you for some reason and break up with you. Their are all kinds of reasons too be nervous around your girlfriend.
June 19th, 2015 2:58am
You love her and you want to impress her. It means that you are a good boyfriend. It also means that you should do something special for the both of you. Getting to know her better will make you less nervous. Good luck!
June 19th, 2015 5:58am
That can be caused from anxiety. Like me I couldn't eat around my boyfriend or anything because I was always so nervous, however I got over it.
June 19th, 2015 6:27am
There are a variety of reasons why you may be nervous around your girlfriend. Maybe youre afraid of disappointing her.
June 19th, 2015 6:34am
This is normal ! Especially in the early beginnings of a relationship. Or maybe at the beginning of a sexual relationship.
June 19th, 2015 9:41am
It's a normal feeling to be nervous around those we like! Though if you're feeling nervous out of fear I advise you seek the advice of a close friend or professional. You should never have to feel unsafe in a relationship!
June 19th, 2015 5:46pm
Maybe you aren't as comfortable with her or it could be that you love her so much that you still feel the first stages of love such as butterflies and stuff.
June 19th, 2015 6:53pm
Maybe you are nor confident about her love towards you, and you're afraid to do anything to upset her. You should relax and have faith in her love towards you. She loves you as you are
June 19th, 2015 9:35pm
Sounds like you like her a lot! There's no reason to be nervous around her. She's with you because she likes you too, so don't worry about having to impress her because you already did! Because you like her and it's an innate psychological response. I think you should just take things easy and focus on being comfortable around her. I can't speak for you, but when I've dated a girl and I feel nervous it is usually because I can't tell what she's thinking. I want her to like me, but I don't want to appear needy. It can be very hard to attract and keep someone's interest!
June 20th, 2015 3:45am
Well, it could be lots of reason's to why. The word Why is a endless path's to the word WHAT IF. They shore the same feel and the pointless question to your self. But that was a Personal suggestion on my part. To really find the issue just be open to your self and how you feel and write each thing down. Even questions that you want or would like to know more from her. This can help you build a better relationship. And rise your self-esteem as well.
June 20th, 2015 6:34am
I would say that it is because you don't want to make a fool out of yourself in front of someone you like. It is perfectly normal :)
June 20th, 2015 9:51am
I think you're nervous around your girlfriend because you have positive feelings towards her, so you're afraid of doing something wrong when you're with her that will maybe lead her to like you less. But if she loves you, you don't need to worry about that.
June 20th, 2015 3:15pm
You're nervous because you want her to really like you and you want to make a good impression. Being nervous meansbyou care, and that's good. You could tell her about it and I'm sure you'd feel a lot less nervous.
June 20th, 2015 7:02pm
if it's a new relationship i think it's normal. everyone gets nervous sometimes. Are you scared of losing her? Afraid of being intimate?
June 21st, 2015 4:01am
I think it could be that you are worried about something which involves her. It could be that you are keeping something from her, or that you are worried that she will act a certain way and set you off. Either way, it's from my personal experience that you should try to get to the bottom of it, pinpoint when you get nervous around her. By doing this, you can figure out more precisely what is making you nervous, and then you can figure out how to solve it TOGETHER. Please, let them help you in this, you don't have to go it alone, even if it's them that makes you nervous.