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Why am I so nervous around my girlfriend?

172 Answers
Last Updated: 07/04/2020 at 10:46pm
Why am I so nervous around my girlfriend?
1 Tip to Feel Better
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Jennifer Patterson, LMFT, ATR-BC

Art Therapist

Life can be messy. Sometimes you need a little support to make your way through it. I love to help guide people through their challenges & to find the beauty in our messes.

Top Rated Answers
February 24th, 2017 2:42pm
From personal experience, when you are nervous around someone you must really like them! Some level of anxiety in this situation is normal, but for people who suffer from anxiety disorders it may be more severe.
February 25th, 2017 7:26pm
Possibly, you could be experiencing anxiety. You may feel your heart speed up, too; it can also mean you're always aware of what you say and do, trying to fit the expectation of perfect.
March 16th, 2017 5:48am
Has something happened either in this relationship or a previous one to cause discomfort in your relationship? Sometimes, even if our current partner hasn't done anything wrong, we still can't help but project our reactions to past experiences onto them.
April 15th, 2017 5:43am
Because she makes you happy and you are overwhelmed with something you have wanted for a long time and can't believe it's actually happening but you are glad that it is which is hard for you to put into realization.
May 12th, 2017 2:14pm
It might be because you're placing a lot of value on what her opinion of you is. You might find it useful to recognise that a) Even if you say something a bit silly occasionally, it's not going to be the end of the world, and b) she may feel somewhat anxious about what your impressions of her are too
July 16th, 2017 11:00am
A main reason why you are so nervous around your girlfriend or significant other is because you have feeling's for them. With those feeling's come along fears and worries. You aren't good enough, smart enough, or you don't make her as happy as so and so.
July 19th, 2017 5:22pm
People get nervous and anxious around people they find attractive. It is human nature to feel that way. Some people would rather feel hurt by a person they like rather than anything at all. so nervous is better than hurt if you look at it that way. maybe you need to be reasured by your girlfriend that there is nothing to be afraid of. Maybe it is good to have feelings like that and it probably will subside. Hope that helps
August 13th, 2017 6:50pm
I think most people can relate to feeling that way around someone we care for, especially when the relationship is new. This is someone we want to impress and make happy, so I think it's natural to have some feelings of nervousness around them sometimes. Give it time, and you will see yourself relax around them, and things will feel natural. If this is not a new relationship, but the feelings of nervousness are new, maybe there's something on your mind that you need to get out. Sit down, and try to have an open conversation with them. Let them know how you're feeling, even if it's a little difficult to get out. Let them know that they can also trust you, and tell you what's going on in their mind too. Communication is so important, and if they care about you, they'll also care about what you have to say.
September 14th, 2017 9:27am
Sometimes it normal for someone to get nervous around their partner sometimes or if they've been together briefly, or they could just be shy. If something doesn't seem right, I suggest talking to someone and perhaps seeking for help if necessary.
November 19th, 2017 4:16pm
Maybe you feel like you really want to impress her or "be better than usual", and that makes you feel nervous, which is normal. Or you're insecure and that leaves you unconfortable and not knowing how to behave in a normal way.
November 23rd, 2017 9:12am
Reflection is great for stuff like this. Maybe the cause is within yourself, or maybe it isn't. Best thing would be to take an external view on it and attempt to figure it out, every situation is personal.
December 1st, 2017 6:46am
Maybe it's because you care so much about what she thinks about you, but it will be better if you could calm yourself and just be you. She will love you for who you are.
December 7th, 2017 11:36pm
You could be nervous around her because you want her to view you in a positive light and therefore, you are nervous to do something she might find silly or something that in your mind, could lower her view of you.
December 9th, 2017 3:15pm
Is she a friend who shares and cares about my bad sad, days as my happy full of joy days? If I'm honest will she still be a friend?
December 29th, 2017 11:29pm
When you feel nervous around a partner, you may be initially getting to know them or feel fear about opening up.
December 30th, 2017 10:16am
Maybe you are not sure how she feels about you and the relationship in general. Or maybe the relationship is still young and you need more time
January 3rd, 2018 1:26pm
When you get around people you feel attracted to, sometimes you pressure yourself into being a certain way or active a certain way, your body gets flustered and hot and you get nervous because you don’t want to mess things up.
January 20th, 2018 11:40am
Especially if its a new relationship, a couple may feel reserved/nervous around one another because they're simply not used to eachothers company. This is normal and usually over time they will get used to one another and a healthy relationship will be able to develop. If she makes you nervous even though you've been in a relationship with her for a long time, ask yourself, what exactly about her makes you feel nervous? What does she do or say that makes you feel this way? The answers you receive will surely give you more clarity on the matter.
January 20th, 2018 12:08pm
that is a normal reaction. you want that she sees just the best of you, because you like her. so this makes you nervous. That is totally normal in the beginning.
January 31st, 2018 12:25am
You just need to relax and be yourself around her. You need to let yourself free from any barrier that's not letting you open up.
February 4th, 2018 7:53am
You might be scarred at being with her. You think about too many outcomes so you feel anxiety. Just take a deep breath and engage in a conversation! Communication normally is the way to push towards.
February 8th, 2018 5:07am
you may not want to mess things up and your scared that shell leave you your probably scared of being alone and you don't know what you would do without her and if you have already experienced heart ack you don't what to feel that again.
February 21st, 2018 7:06pm
Maybe you aren't comfortable with her? It can take time to get comfortable with someone, even in a relationship. It is normal. Have you talked to her about it? Maybe she can help with it? You never know, maybe she is feeling the same way.
March 1st, 2018 6:53pm
You're scared that you'll do something wrong that will push her away. You have feelings for her and you don't want to lose her.
March 2nd, 2018 2:26pm
You probably are feeling scared that you will do something that she will not like and you are feeling unsure. It's normal
March 4th, 2018 3:17pm
You might be nervous around you're girlfriend because of something they did wrong in the past that you don't want to see it happen again and this is why you get nervous when they're around.
April 6th, 2018 3:35am
I think it's because you don't want to mess up your relationship. You know you've got something good when you're anxious about the outcome. It's precious that you are nervous, because it shows you really care that this relationship ends well.
April 11th, 2018 6:06pm
I find that I get so wound up about doing everything right that I get really nervous around my partner. You could be getting nervous for the same reason.
June 2nd, 2018 10:45am
It can be normal for someone to get nervous around their partner. They could be shy and be a bit more reserved than yourself. If something doesn't seem right with the situation, I suggest talking to someone that you know and trust and possibly seeking for help if you feel that you need it.
June 17th, 2018 7:23am
It's normal to be nervous in the early stages of the relationship, because you want to make sure everything goes smoothly. But if this pertains to later on in the relationship, it may be caused by anxiety. There are many great resources to learn and help cope with anxiety on 7Cups.