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Why can't I be around a group of people without feeling like everyone's looking at me?

12 Answers
Last Updated: 11/23/2020 at 5:55am
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Monique Bivins, MA, LPC

Licensed Professional Counselor

I have a real passion for helping my clients to overcome life's obstacles . My work with clients is nonjudgmental, supportive, and interactive.

Top Rated Answers
June 30th, 2020 8:52pm
Good question. I don't know. Social anxiety is a big problem for many of us. Just think that you are not the centre of the universe, you are not the only thing they are thinking about. They are people, just like you and as you have so many thoughts and feelings they have too. They don't have time and energy to always look and stare you. They are not your enemies. Your anxiety is your worst enemy, not people. This sensation comes because you thing you are wrong, ridiculous, silly and pathetic. But you are not this things. You are smart, kind and brave.
February 16th, 2015 9:00pm
I think that many people feel the same way in a group setting--that others are looking and judging--and some people are better at masking their insecurities. Everyone has the potential to be great, and we are often our own worst critics. It is often a case of mind over matter to feel more self-confident when participating in a group setting. Other times, it is a matter of choosing the best possible group of people to be around, those who are supportive and less interested in being judgmental!
May 5th, 2015 6:12pm
We all have felt this from time to time. Sometimes social situations can make us feel awkward or as if all eyes are on us. I know that what I call mine is social anxiety. There are a lot of really helpful tools on 7 cups and online that deal with social anxiety, that I think will be very helpful for you. Remember you have a support group with 7 cups and please visit the anxiety support group as well. Don't hesitate to reach out to us!
September 6th, 2015 6:37pm
It can be hard to deal with these emotions. It could be that you suffer from some type of "social" issue which makes it hard for you to be around others. You can find the help you need by speaking with a counselor or therapist who can help.
December 7th, 2015 4:01pm
I often feel self conscious as well, especially because I take up a lot of space. Whether everyone is actually looking or not, if you can reach down inside and love yourself, it's a lot easier to not care what anyone thinks!
June 21st, 2016 6:38am
You can't be around a group of people because you feel that they're looking at you or talking, laughing at you instead of paying attention to themselves. You can work on this by imagining what your group of friends would do.
August 23rd, 2016 1:34pm
Sometimes, it depends on the people you hang out with. It is most likely that you would not notice much about the people around when you are enjoying others' companies. I believe that being in the company of the right people, even when you are surrounded by lots of strangers, you will soon see that everything becomes a blur.
April 24th, 2017 12:59am
This can be due to fears that you have, feeling extreme self-awareness might be due to you being scared to being embarrassed infront of everyone or worried they will all somehow realize that you are an "imposter" or "not good enough". Dealing with this can be challenging but doable, ask yourself what you are scared of. Envision the worst case scenarios for what could happen when you are with people and the one that makes you heart beat the hardest is what you need to work on.
November 13th, 2018 9:02pm
This is simple! It's because you have an abundance of self awareness. Self awareness can be healthy or unhealthy depending on how it makes you feel. I remember the first time I joined a big public gym - I thought everyone was watching my workout, and I felt very self-conscious of everything I was doing. However, after I kept working out at the same gym over the course of a few weeks, I realized nobody was really paying attention to me specifically. People were there to do their workouts, and even if they were looking at me, the realization of having eyes on me just sort of faded. The more I did it, the easier it was. Now, I'm very comfortable in all social situations because I've been around a large group of people I don't know for years.
March 26th, 2019 10:05pm
This might have to do with a low self-esteem, social anxiety or maybe even a combination of the two. It's important to not self-diagnose though, if it gets really uncomfortable for you and you feel like you start avoiding situations because of it, it might be important to look for professional help. You can try to get more confident, the more you love yourself the less other's opionions will bother you, so you won't care as much if people would be looking at you. I can reassure you that that thought is most likely just overthinking, they have no reason to just look at you. Try to think how realistic these thoughts might be and try to calm yourself that way.
May 5th, 2020 3:35pm
it sounds like you may be having some trouble with some social anxiety. how long have you felt this way? it is completely normal to feel anxiety around people we are social creatures who naturally seek support and reassurance and aproval from others. would you mind telling me about the last time you were anxious in public. if you dont mind telling me i am here to support you and be a friendly kind ear and a good sounding board to bounce feelings and thoughts off of i too have had my fair share of social anxiety particularly in my case public speaking.
November 23rd, 2020 5:55am
I am sorry to hear that you're experiencing this- this feeling can be really overbearing. I promise you that this feeling can be normal, but I also promise you that they are not looking at you. This feeling might be rooted in some insecurities. It is very easy to feel like we are the center of attention when we are not so happy with the way we look sometimes. This can be the clothes we wear to even the fact that we might not have brushed our teeth or our hair is a mess. A lot of this anxiety can be reduced by taking some time to take deep breaths and rationalize our situation. Sometimes it is easy to be worried about what people think about us, but I can tell you that these people you're around (unless they are your friends or people you're actively communicating with) probably do not even really notice you. People tend to be absorbed in whatever it is they're doing and not pay so much detailed attention to their peripheral.