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Why do I always fail even when I try my hardest?

243 Answers
Last Updated: 05/27/2022 at 2:42pm
Why do I always fail even when I try my hardest?
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Top Rated Answers
Angell
January 30th, 2020 3:52pm
Failing even after giving it your best time and again shows that maybe there could be some issues with the method with which you apply your hardworking. So it could be due to the fact that your energy and efforts are enough but your the technique may not suit you and give you results. Therefore to improve the result you should focus on the process, if you believe you can work hard towards something change the way you work towards it from now and and try something that suit your needs and helps you to pass. hope this helps
friendlyRainbows89
February 14th, 2020 3:39pm
Sometimes , life can be difficult . Turn your failures into opportunities to try something else . Keep trying after failure . The main thing , don’t give up . Some of the most famous people failed . They kept trying and trying and trying. Write out how failure makes you feel and how to get over it . What has it taught you specifically ? If you were talking to a friend about failure , is this how you speak to yourself ? Don’t give up hope . Again, never giving up is the most important thing . Always see failure as a opportunity.
VanessaCheetoh
February 19th, 2020 7:16am
Failure is just another word for a lesson. When you fail it is just a bump in the road and you have to get out of the car and fix the car and start driving again. Failure is a wonderful way to wipe the slate clean and build again and you are building with now knowing what you know. Failure is apart of life and it should be embraced. Think of failure as a challenge for you to get up and dust yourself off and try again because the only way that you truly fail is you give up.
BabyyTyy10
February 22nd, 2020 9:07am
Sometimes the only way we learn is by failing. You know how children when they begin to walk fall. They try their best but end up falling, there parents even try to knock them down at some points because they'll be chaotic when they're up. But during that time they will fall by themselves but they pick themselves up right? well that's how they learn. We're the same, you know when you fall over, do you just stay on the floor? no, you pick yourself up and keep walking. I know you're probably like, it's easy for her to say, but I mean it, once we pick ourselves up once, it'll become easy and like a habit. The world will test you brutally and push you down, but you shouldn't surrender and try harder, but don't forget yourself, whilst you do because that will affect you worse than all.
wildghostmemories
March 1st, 2020 1:42am
I can't imagine how difficult it would feel to feel like you always fail even when you try. I want to commend you for trying over and over again - that is really admirable that you are willing to keep going. Trying when stuff gets hard shows what a strong person you are and I really respect that. I would like to know more about what you feel like is "failing" do you think you could tell me more about that? Feel free to reach out and message me or another listener here on 7cups for support if you want to talk more.
WanderingSparrow
March 7th, 2020 4:02am
We don't fail always when we try our hardest. It is when we feel failure because everything didnt go as we planned...like, you may have thought of a project that you could hardly get done. But when you could really get it done perfectly after trying your hardest you might have thought of some praises from people which you didn't get...so you starts thinking "It was not a success enough i must have been a failure always." Another thing I can say from my experience, most of the time we lose our energy thinking about trying or working hard on something before actually getting it done. So it may feel like we were trying our hardest but actually it was only the "hardest" made by our thoughts...not the "best"!
Anonymous
March 15th, 2020 10:07am
From my perspective, failure is a matter of point of view. Trying your hardest is already a huge success as most people never go this far. Failure is a success in itself as you learn, experience after experience, what works and what does not. Most people never learn how good success feels because they have not failed enough. Failing builds strong mental values, leading to more intense and rewarding successes than if you had not failed. Failure is a mentor. You can decide to deny its lessons or you can take them, accept them, and adapt. You will then discover your previous hardest was just a tiny sample of your full potential.
HappyHealthySane
April 17th, 2020 3:57am
Though you may fail at what you were trying to achieve, each and every failure has a lesson to teach and is therefore never a true failure. Whatever is meant for you will be and what ever is not meant for you will teach you. The most important part of the lesson may be to see if you have the determination to get back up after falling down and to try your hardest again. Life is not about the destination, it is about the journey. Be mindful and know that the best is yet to come. And it will come with time and patience.
victoryhavealittlefaith5555
April 18th, 2020 1:01am
Do we fail always? Can someone fail always? In a day we have so many little things, or little more greater things to accomplish and all these little and big events are part of our life. To use the word "always" seems to me already so definite. "Always" defines something that is not rooted in real life, but rather in perception and interpretation. We can pose huge tasks in front of us and feel that we are failing if we do not do everything that we imagined to do. We can keep being not happy with little things that we accomplish. We can keep refusing the fact that the life is about small moments and that attitude about those small moments can make us or break us. We all can and should fail sometimes and that is ok. Do we fail ALWAYS? If we make a big research and interview all people in the whole wide world my hypothesis is that we can not find that person. Try your hardest to live your dreams, but try not to be unhappy when you do not accomplish all your dreams. Dreams should be bigger than our life. Let us grade ourselves based on the many things that we do and accomplish throughout our lives, and do not suffer because we did not accomplish something. Live in the moment, move, breath, greet, acknowledge, share, love, run, cook, hug, talk, write, read, do, be...Among thousands things that you do you can not be the one that fails always. Nobody can.
BA02
April 23rd, 2020 6:01pm
Many people feel like they try really hard all the time and they can never get things right. A lot of times this happens to people in school or at work. Trying to succeed can be a hard thing for anyone. A lot of times people try to impress their parents or loved ones and it never works out for them. Many people experience failure and disappointment but it is important how they react to that. Sometimes it is tricky to see the best way we can succeed but failing comes with a lot of lessons that you can use to succeed as along as you keep on Trying like you do now.
Anonymous
May 14th, 2020 11:34pm
Even though we put all of our efforts into one thing, the outcome can be the opposite of what we expect. When we fail, it does not define who we are, but is a reason. No matter how hard we try, we will encounter failure, and its not about how many times we fall, but how we get back up and persevere. It's a test to see if we give up or if we continue to fight. Even if the path ahead seems impossible, no matter how many obstacles we encounter, we will reach our destination with time and experience.
Anonymous
May 24th, 2020 8:52pm
I hate to sound like a self-help guru. But there is no failure unless you stop trying. Every failure will provide you a chance to improve and learn. A lot of time it is your mindset that pushes you to the cul-de-sac. Whenever you think you have hit a wall, pause. Don't guilt yourself and stay in the negative headspace. There has to be something you can salvage from the mess of your "failure". Things are not good or bad. It is your own opinion makes you feel that way. Analysize and try again. One day when you look back, you may think I am glad that I didn't succeed at the first try. Or I would have achieved as much as now. Rinse and repeat till you get there.
Anonymous
June 12th, 2020 6:16pm
Honestly, I have no idea I swear since I could remember I would work my butt of in class but when it came to exams and assignments it didn't reflect my hard work in the classroom. I was one of those people who did the prep and always knew the answer but my grades don't reflect that and it hurts. I wish i knew why this was always the case. It hurts and make me feel like I'm not smart enough and compares to people i know it make me feel stupid. I'm actually nervous to apply for a post grad because it doesn't look like I worked hard because of my grades even though I did work hard... probably not hard enough. I wish I knew why.
GeorginasRayoflittleLight
June 14th, 2020 2:56pm
Failure is really hard to stomach, especially when it's school related, for me those used to and still hurt the most, but sometimes it's not effort alone that helps us succeed, its also how we make that effort. You may be trying really hard, but are you following the rules?, are putting all your effort in a particular place and not putting enough somewhere else?. Honestly, no matter how hard we work we never really know if it'll make us pass or keep failing, but it is important that you keep moving forward, that failure isnt going to last forever.. find a way through it, because like me, you definitely can, and you will :). Go over what you may not be doing right, re-strategise, dont just do the same thing all over again. Trust me, you'll find some better results, im rooting for you!
peacefulLight8704
July 3rd, 2020 8:59pm
Failure can always be difficult to deal with, no matter how you look at it. We all want to be successful, and some of us deal with very real perfectionist complexes which can make failure seem all the more harsh. Even when we try, we sometimes will fail, simply because we are not perfect. Not a single one of us is. Sometimes it may feel like success is far away, but the best thing that we are able to do is to review our mistakes and try to learn from them so that we know what we should do in the future!
Lazydeeps
July 7th, 2020 6:24pm
Definition of failure is designed by us. Not achieving the purpose I started with may not be failure ( though for most of us it is). Our experience always teaches us something and the take-away is again individual specific. When I try my hardest, I am likely to gain the satisfaction of giving my best. If I compare my current performance with my previous one, I might be in a better position to improve myself. Though social comparison might have helped us from evolutionary perspective to save our species, the context might have changed for us to stick to the old rules.
Bjorn8001
July 29th, 2020 11:48am
Sometimes I fail even when I put my hardest efforts into achieving a certain goal. Usually I pinned this on my own failure as a person and not being good enough, but have grown as a person to understand that sometimes the path I chose was not the path I was meant to follow. That achieving that specific goal was not meant to be, that outside unplanned and uncontrollable aspects stood in my way. I also understand that failure is a learning curve and that it must be used to better myself. Once you have failed you should see where the failure rooted from, learn from it and try again.
friendlyWaterfall9269
August 6th, 2020 1:26am
Failing is part of learning. It is when you fail, that is when you learn what you need to improve on. Instead of perceiving failure as an obstacle, see it as an experience to grow from. Once you figure out why or how you keep failing, you can then take what you learn to improve your performance. Success is not suppose to be easy. Success is a challenge. If someone doesn't fail first before succeeding, then they would never really learn. I think personally, failing is part of the learning experience. Not only does it improve your action to the goal, but it makes one more humble.
allnaturalBraid9663
August 7th, 2020 4:06pm
When you try your hardest, you expect the most perfect outcome possible. You have envisioned what you want, and anything that doesn't measure up to that seems unsatisfactory. You set the highest expectations for yourself when you try your hardest, which makes it more likely for you to feel as though you failed. Trying your hardest also makes you focus and think too much about little tasks that you usually do without thinking. You put so much more pressure on yourself, resulting in extra stress that can make it harder for you to be successful in your the task at hand.
Anonymous
September 16th, 2020 1:18am
Maybe your definition of "fail" is too harsh! Try to give yourself a break, as overworking yourself can cause just as many mistakes as being an inattentive worker. Trying your hardest should be a success all by itself. Try looking differently at the word "fail". How do you describe it? Do you define it based on what you think others may see as failure, or do you define it based on how you feel after the fact, or how much effort you put in? I think it is important to consider your own thoughts and feelings, and define "failure" and "success" in your own terms, without worrying what other people think.
naturalFriend77
September 26th, 2020 7:46pm
Sometimes failure is a relative term. I don't like to see things as failure or success. I prefer to look at if I learned something or not, If I made an impact or not. Did you do something more than before you started? Then you didn't actually fail. Did you learn what to do better next time or not to do next time? Then you didn't fail. Failure is just a frame of perspective. Maybe you didn't make the entire giant leap you were hoping for in one go. But small steps in the right direction are still success. You read a book one word at at time not a chapter all at once. Life is the same way.
Anonymous
October 4th, 2020 6:04am
Great question. So what makes you think that you have failed? I think that you are brave for trying your hardest. And it is never a fail in my book if you learned something from whatever you think you failed at that will help you to do better the next time around. Keep up your spirits and eventually you will accomplish what you are wanting to. I also think it is helpful to remember we all have setbacks no matter how hard we try. It is so important not to become discouraged or to let those setbacks stop us from continuing to move forward. Just keep trying until you accomplish your goal. Don’t give up. With enough time, patience and perseverance you will prevail
proudPeace77
October 8th, 2020 7:42pm
Perhaps you are setting your standards to high? sometimes we need to think about the things that we are doing in the present in our lives and see our achievements there and set ourselves achievable goals and learn from experience, but we must never give up and not beat ourselves up about such things. We must be kind to ourselves and look for other ways to succeed, and maybe think about things that we have succeeded in in the past and work from them. Happiness can be found in the simplest of things. Try to take a step back and find something to distract yourself, like going for a walk or watching a nice movie on the tv, or going clothes shopping or something like that.
MrNurse
October 17th, 2020 2:12am
Maybe your failure isn't the failure you think it is. When I fall, which is all the time, I always blame myself. I feel like I become self defeating in the process. I'm usually not the one who is at fault for my issues, but it is so easy to see myself as the problem. I feel like when we beat up on ourselves, we become our own worst critics and tend to be more prone to not being able to carry out the tasks that we were aiming for to improve ourselves in this crazy world. Give yourself some patience.
Anonymous
October 22nd, 2020 1:02am
Sometimes trying our hardest isn't what is needed. Sometime preparing our hardest is what we have to do. Whether that is studying, planning, training, etc. If we try our hardest but haven't given any thought to what we need to prepare, it might not matter. Likewise, goal setting is similarly important. Effort without focus isn't a recipe for success. You need to have both parts of the equation. I hope that doesn't come off as negative, and I hope it makes sense. I think a good analogy could be you might be the hardest working and best baseball pitcher, but if it is so foggy that you can't see the catcher, you probably won't throw a strike.
hopebeyondpain
October 25th, 2020 7:07am
Because that's simply the way life works. It doesn't mean that you're a failure, or that you haven't tried hard enough. Sometimes it just doesn't work out, and there's nothing we can do about it. There are many, many things in life we can't control, and this is one of them. We can't bend reality to accept us, we have to work with what we have. And that means learning to let go of the things that we can't have, no matter how hard we've worked for it. If you can reach your goal, have the courage to do it. But if you know you can't, have the courage to let go
Anonymous
November 7th, 2020 2:38am
Well this is a common issue which many people have. The issue is the art of working smarter rather than harder so sometimes you may fail despite trying your very hardest maybe because you didn't work smart instead of hard. But still I wouldn't sweat it too much sometimes results don't come out how you expected them to come out which is okay. If that's the case despite working smart rather than just hard I would just give myself credit just for trying your best and doing what you could do which is your input rather than your output.
Anonymous
November 12th, 2020 11:53pm
It sometimes feels like I fail when I try my best, but I might not be just not using positive thoughts. I can think about the positive things I have done, where I excel in other areas, and how I can change my thinking. So I can say, maybe I didn't do as well as I wanted to on that test, but I am learning more about the topics and think critically. I may have done poorly on that test, but I am still accomplishing my homework and doing well in the class. Maybe I can meet with my teacher to find a better way to study or discuss the areas I may not be well advanced in.
jemimah22
November 18th, 2020 11:47am
I am really sorry to hear that this is what you are going through. It is important to remember that you are not the sum of your achievements, but it is the effort you attempt things with that matters. If you are showing up and trying your best, even after your efforts haven't previously been recognised the way in which you want them to be, then that dedication and perseverance is, in itself, something that you should be immensely proud of. If it is schoolwork you are struggling with, communicate your concerns with a trusted teacher. I promise you that there always will be someone willing to listen, and who wants to help you. You are not a failure. Keep trying and you will see that for yourself
rayofsunshine888
November 20th, 2020 8:49am
i was just thinking of this. i always do honestly. my hard work never pays off whether it's an exam or anything else. i put so much work and effort in things that other people barely pay attention to and they succeed in it way more than i do. which leaves me wondering, am i just stupid? i once studied for long hours for my physics exam and thought i was gonna ace it. it was a three hours long exam and i had a breakdown in the first hour and didn't know how to write anything. i died that day unsurprisingly and felt like the biggest loser in the world. till this day it still happens to me to put my best into something and failing. but if i can only succeed at failing let it be.. failing is not as scary as giving up. if you fail but try again and give it your best all over, knowing damn well it might not work out, than that is better than succeeding. cause you my friend just succeeded at being persistent, hard working, and strong headed. and that's a win. eventually you'll learn from your fails and they'll turn into wins. you cant fail the same thing twice. the more you fail the more you succeed in return. so don't give up ane keep failing!!!