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How can I feel happy about being single?

302 Answers
Last Updated: 07/30/2020 at 6:50pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Jessica McDaniel, LPC, LCPC

Licensed Professional Counselor

I have been practicing cognitive behavioral psychotherapy since 2007 with a diverse group of adult clients with various diagnoses, all races, and socioeconomic classes.

Top Rated Answers
brianna67
October 9th, 2019 10:33pm
I highly, highly recommend the book 'How to be Single and Happy' by Jennifer Taitz. She's a clinical psychologist and expert on the topic. The book changed my life and the title should really be "How to Happy and Fulfilled." To summarize the book, it teaches you other ways to fulfill your life without a partner and to start doing what you'd want to do with a partner. It's especially helpful to work through any dating anxieties or fear of ending up alone. And as an added bonus, focusing on yourself and giving your life more meaning might end up making you a more attractive partner to attract others!
BlakeKai
February 21st, 2019 8:43pm
Think about being single in a positive way. People who are single typically live longer, are happier, and take better care of themselves. You can accomplish anything you want and in some situations you do not need someone to hold you down. You can always find your one and only however it’s important to know who you are and what you want before you can involve yourself with anyone else into your life. It’s fine to be single just keep your eyes peeled for that special someone that could end up right in front of you. Stay being you
Rebekahlistener
July 25th, 2018 9:07am
Its all about perspective. Being single can sometimes feel lonely, however it is a great opportunity to perceive 'singleness' as a time to develop and invest in yourself. Do things that make you feel happy, without anyone else. For me, when single, I find happiness thru yoga, meditation and investing in my friendships. The more you continue on a journey of self-development in which you find contentment in and of yourself, the more prepared you will be in the future to invite someone else into your life.
Opalescentrose
July 29th, 2018 11:42pm
Love will come around when you least expect it, and even if it doesn't, that's ok too! Society makes being single a bad deal but remember that your worth as a person doesn't depends on wether or not you are in a relationship and that it is ok to not have a partner
Anonymous
August 15th, 2018 4:36pm
Go out and do something you enjoy and be happy to be yourself treat yourself for dinner or something else.
Anonymous
August 17th, 2018 11:04pm
Well, most of all the things that have a part in this equation, you ahve to love hanging out with just you. the first step is to be happy with yourself and to realise that you are complete and you do not need anyone to make you whole. You don't need to find 'the one', you are 'the one'. Learn how to have fun with yourself, laugh at yourself, explore yourself, think about yourself, before you even think about adding another person to your life. do all the thing with yourself you would normaly do with an SO. Who knows, you might just be te person you needed all along. After all, first and foremost, you are the person you will have to spent your life with.
thoughtfulArrow88
September 1st, 2018 11:10am
Being single has given me a kind of emotional freedom I never knew I needed. It also gives me a lot of time for myself, my family and my friends. It's good to know that you're not being lied to, cheated on or played with anymore. You don't have to constantly check your phone or wait for texts from your partner. You don't have to cancel your other plans just to meet your partner. Overall there's a lot of emotional drama saved by being single. Most importantly though, being single teaches me how to value myself and know my worth and I am learning to be happy and content with myself a little more, everyday.
LittleRayeOfSunshine
November 29th, 2017 9:29pm
In my personal experience with being single and in relationships, there is one thing that helped me so much when it came to feeling happy and content with myself. It was showing gratitude. Now it doesn't have to be being grateful for being single, it could be something as little as maybe having the clothes you have on right now. They might not be the best quality but they keep you covered and give you some warmth. Think about the time it took to make that outfit, think about the person who designed it, who had to pitch it to a company, who had to go to school to get that job. See? You can go as far back as you'd like when it comes to gratitude. Showing little bits of gratitude like that every day can make a big difference when it comes to thinking about what you have right now in the present that you feel like you can appreciate the little things you have in life. What I do when I show gratitude is I identify a small object that I keep with me at all times. Maybe my keys, my phone, jewelry, glasses, something that is easy to just carry around with you. Personally, mine is a little bracelet that my cousin made me at camp, which has a lot of history and resemblance to me. I always have it in my pocket (in fact, I have it right now) and every time I put my hands in my pocket or touch it, I think of something I'm grateful for. Maybe for you, it can be every time you pick up your phone, or every time you adjust your glasses, or fiddle with your jewelry. Taking the time to show gratitude is a good way to find happiness with what you have in the present, and I believe it'll help you find happiness in being single.
Anonymous
September 23rd, 2018 8:06pm
Single means you're not attached to somebody which is a good thing. And when you are single there's no fears of being cheated. No need to be awake texting. No confusions about friendships. No fights. No attachments. No need to spend money on gifts and stuff. You have time for yourself. But the best part in my point of view is freedom. Being single means you can do whatever you want at whenever you like without anyone's permission. You're in charge of yourself. You can be happy and independent. I think being single is the happiest, most freeing feeling in the world.
Anonymous
October 13th, 2018 2:45pm
you are free and able to experience relationships with different people to understand what you want once you settle down in to a long term relationship with someone you enjoy spending time with and love to be around. remember to understand that you are were you are supposed to be right now in life and you will eventually be happier and have everything you want in life. being single means being free and understanding that you are free means enjoying your life. once you are single, and over a heartbreak, it is the most amazing feeling ever. being single is great
SnowButterf1y
November 2nd, 2018 3:47am
We all afraid of being single due to fear of being alone and that we don't feel complete. However, true happiness is from within ourself. When we understands and know who we really are, our purposes in life, things that we enjoy doing and what we do not enjoy makes us feel confident about ourselves, it brings out the best of us. Unfortunately, this cannot be achieved entirely when we are not by ourselves as there are too many things we are focusing while we are in a relationship. Sometimes people lost themselves as well. There are many activities that can be done to feel happy by just being single. For example doing activities that you always long to do and never able to come around when you are in relationship. Going on a spontaneous trip to soul search yourself, to widen your horizon, opens up your mind, learn and grow. Learn about yourself, learn to love yourself and you will feel happy by just having yourself.
allnaturalForest79
November 7th, 2018 1:35pm
Now I don't know too much, but I want you to think about what I'm going to say if you want an answer. To feel happy is to feel okay? Can't you feel okay to be happy? And happy to be okay? So they can be called one in the same can they not? Well if that is the case then you need to question your thoughts on happiness and not on your relationship status. You need to start to question just why are you sure not happy, because it is not because you are single. There must be something deeper, because would you really say you aren't okay right now?
Anonymous
November 8th, 2018 10:29am
In my experience the most important thing is to learn to love yourself first! Every single part of you... the light and the dark. After that I was able to reflect on whether a relationship was something I wanted, and if I did, what I wanted that relationship to look like. For me it was important to look past the heteronormative nuclear family as the ultimate relationship 'goal' because those are not the values that are important to me. I recognised that I don't want a relationship just for the sake of it, but I needed to understand what I wanted out of it, as selfish as that sounds!
00OpenEars00
November 14th, 2018 10:07am
Just remember that there is a whole world out there and so many opportunities waiting for you. Don’t forget to surround yourself with family and friends that you love and trust. It’s just a moment in time, take that time to become the best version of yourself you can be and get to know who you really are. When it comes to falling in love, you don’t want to rush it. You will know when the time is right for you. After you find that one person who is everything you have ever dreamed of, all the time you spent on your own will be worth it.
AdventureTime5
November 18th, 2018 7:22am
Invest in yourself and do the activities you want to do. Being single should not be a sad emotion or a negative thought. Embrace being free and independent and take this opportunity to do whatever you want. It could be travelling, living in another country or city, learn a new skill, invest in an interest or hobby, meet new people or volunteer. Learn how to feel comfortable in your own skin and explore what you want to do in life. Find something you are passionate about and build your own empire. Learn how to love yourself first and put yourself first.
Anonymous
December 8th, 2018 8:56pm
Find strength within youself! Do things that you enjoy and can take time with yourself. Get to know youself better and grow to be content with being alone. Finding purpose in another person is tricky anf can leave you heartbroken but if you are comfortable with yourself than perhaps you can feel happy about being single. Being single can also create more time for you to be with friends and family that you love. You have more time to dedicate to things that make you happy. There can be alot of joy created from being out of a relationship, especially if it is toxic.
Anonymous
December 16th, 2018 8:15pm
Being a happy single person comes from loving and accepting yourself. Many of us want a significant other and if you have recently had a breakup then the single life can feel kind of lonely. Indulging in hobbies and interests can be fulfilling as well as trying new things, meeting new people and spending time with friends and family. It can take time to get used to the single life but surrounding yourself with the right people and taking part in activities you enjoy can help you on your journey to happiness. It is also a good time to get to know yourself.
BlankaM
January 9th, 2019 9:49pm
Self love. 100%. Focusing on yourself, finding new hobbies, occupying yourself by doing something new. You will soon discover that you are amazing on your own and you DO NOT need something to complete you because you complete yourself on your own by being you and exploring yourself and your talents. It is so important to look after yourself, spiritually and mentally, so take some time off to get to know yourself, your thoughts and just focus on being you! Being single is a wonderful opportunity to not worry about anything but yourself, and this part of your life is so essential in order to find your true passions.
Anonymous
February 10th, 2019 5:22pm
Well, first of all there is always hope of one day finding the right person and if you are still single you know there is actually someone else who is single because there is a mate for everybody out there regardless of how you look or how broke you might be. I know that God made a mate for everybody just like He did with all the animals that Adam named. So, please keep looking because your mate is out there, The problem might be that you are over looking your mate because of high expectation or possibly wanting a perfect situation. There are no perfect people or perfect situation. You must be willing to try to grow together with a person and sometimes growing mean being placed in a different soil to grow. I'm not talking about people of the same skin complexion but all people, who are of a dating age to be in a relationship to date.
supportivekayla
July 6th, 2019 10:08pm
Break ups can be very difficult since you are so used to their company and spending so much time together. Now, you have to figure out how to live your life without them. Being happy while single is possible. Find things that you enjoy doing, people you enjoy doing them with, and keep your mind occupied. Being single doesn’t mean you are alone, because there are many people that care for you and love you. Don’t let your mind wander into places in which you would be unhappy. Don’t be afraid to ask questions, we are all here to listen.
SmallLouise1904
September 19th, 2019 9:12pm
There are many ways you could feel happy being single. Like my granny told me theres always time to be together so you should cherish the time that you are alone. And you don't actually have to be all alone while being single. You can spend more time with friends and not to worry about being late to a date. Also you don't have to share food which is a very good plus. And if you want more company, you could get a pet so you still are single but you have someone who waits you at home to be cuddled.
Jalyn906
September 12th, 2019 7:34am
I think you can feel happy about being single is that 1. you don’t have to be worrying about if this person is doing this or that 2. you get to focus on yourself more 3. You stress less 4. You don’t have to be questioned about certain stuff like where are you going? Who are you going with? Is there gonna be boys there? Wear something different your showing too much skin I feel like that’s some ways you can be happy about being single cause you don’t have to constantly be stress about another person you get more time to focus on yourself
Daishy
September 6th, 2019 7:09pm
LOVE yourself and always remind yourself that your happiness does not depend on anyone but yourself. Eat right, have fun and stay positive at all times. Learn to do things by yourself, it helps you improve in dependency. Find your happy place. Start away from what ever will steal your joy. Use your imagination always. Never be afraid to try something new, maybe like a sport or some activity. Learn and keep yourself busy. Being busy is a great way to get your mind off some stuffs so I'll suggest doing some volunteer work. And remember, always be yourself and love yourself too!
Anonymous
August 18th, 2019 1:21pm
By realizing a relationship isn't the only source of happiness you need for a healthy lifestyle. Also, if you can't love yourself, how could you ever love someone else?? Being single is a time when you can take care of yourself and you can go out with anyone and experiment with a lot of things:), which you can't do at least in a traditional relationship where going out with someone else than your partner can be considered cheating. Take your time and build up on yourself!
Anonymous
August 17th, 2019 1:26am
Learn to be contented and being happy being with yourself. Cause there is nothing wrong with being single. Actually its more fun cause you can do what you want to do. And you're probably more free than when you were in a relationship. You have friends, enjoy their company. Appreciate their presence. Do something you've always wanted to do. Treat yourself as how you would treat your special someone. There are lots of ideas but find one where you see yourself happy and contented. Do something that excites you. That's the most important thing anyway. I'm hoping for the best. Have fun!
lisalovescats98
August 2nd, 2019 12:29am
You do not need to be in a relationship to be happy. In fact, it's hard to be in a healthy relationship when you're not happy yourself. Working on yourself is the best thing you can do. Try to find your true self, find new hobbies and interests, focus on your mental health, which is a major key to happiness in the long run and you'll feel so much better. You can't love someone else if you dont love yourself. Make you a priority, not other people. That only sacrifices your own sanity and happiness. Love yourself before you love others.
LampIntheRain
July 21st, 2019 6:37am
Being single I enjoy my work, my hobby. Being single gives me more open minded towards the things that I want to do. I can also indulge in activities both social and others without being stopped by someone. Being single also helps me to increase my self independence and also the self esteem to self motivate myself. Being self and living freely is the most important quality that any one should conceive. Single life have many benefits like creating your own world of thoughts and thinking which not only nourishes you, but the world included society shall benefit , peace.
tacobella4
July 11th, 2019 5:16am
For me, what I’ve come to learn is relationships come with A LOT of responsibility. And now after breaking up with my ex, I’m happy to FINALLY bask in the beauties of the single life. It comes down to this: What we see about other people in their relationships is only the tip of the iceberg. All we see on social media is other people having fun, making out, and going to fancy restaurants. What we don’t see are the arguments, insecurities, or incompatibilities within the relationship. We also don’t see the constant stress endured by each person over having to manage someone else’s emotions. When you’re single, that doesn’t mean you have to be completely free of love or dating. You can join a dating website, get closer to someone you know, or meet someone new tomorrow. However, what it DOES mean is that, for a short and beautiful period of time, you have yourself—ALL TO YOURSELF. Take this time to find a new hairstyle, flirt with who you like, watch that TV show your friends are always trying to get you to watch, or simply practice the art of self-care. You will most definitely find love in your life. You will MOST DEFINITELY get tied town into a relationship down the line, and when that happens, it’ll be amazing. Why rush?
calmSnowflake55
May 12th, 2019 4:43am
when you are single, you can focus mainly on bettering yourself. you need to find time to make yourself happy. after you find happiness in yourself then you can worry about being happy with someone else. being single doesn’t necessarily mean that you’re sad. and being taken doesn’t necessarily mean that you’re happy. you just have to work at your own pace and respect your heart enough to let it take time to love itself. i’ve always been told in life, you can’t love anyone unless you love yourself. and that is honestly the key to a good happy long lasting relationship is loving yourself first. so love yourself first and you’ll be happy whether or not you’re in a relationship 🙂
kendogblaze
May 17th, 2019 11:25am
Think of why you feel the way you do about being single. Are you afraid of being alone? Do you wish you had someone with which to share your emotions, thoughts, or life? Or do you want to remain single? Whatever it is, know that being single isn't necessarily a bad thing. There's a lot of pressure in society seek a relationship, whether it's through your friends, family, or social media. The truth is, a lot of people aren't ready for a relationship or don't even want one, and that's okay. Don't worry about trying not to be single. Try to think of what you can do with the extra time you have as someone single. Take this time to invest in yourself. Pick up a new hobby, go out with your friends, or meet new people. Build yourself. If you do want a relationship in the future, when the time's right and you feel that you're ready for a relationship, go out and give it a try. One last thing, don't compare yourself to others, especially people in relationships on social media, because everything is not always as it seems. Don't rush. You have time, and when the time is right, you'll know.