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How can I feel happy about being single?

303 Answers
Last Updated: 07/30/2020 at 6:50pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Jessica McDaniel, LPC, LCPC

Licensed Professional Counselor

I have been practicing cognitive behavioral psychotherapy since 2007 with a diverse group of adult clients with various diagnoses, all races, and socioeconomic classes.

Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
November 8th, 2018 10:29am
In my experience the most important thing is to learn to love yourself first! Every single part of you... the light and the dark. After that I was able to reflect on whether a relationship was something I wanted, and if I did, what I wanted that relationship to look like. For me it was important to look past the heteronormative nuclear family as the ultimate relationship 'goal' because those are not the values that are important to me. I recognised that I don't want a relationship just for the sake of it, but I needed to understand what I wanted out of it, as selfish as that sounds!
00OpenEars00
November 14th, 2018 10:07am
Just remember that there is a whole world out there and so many opportunities waiting for you. Don’t forget to surround yourself with family and friends that you love and trust. It’s just a moment in time, take that time to become the best version of yourself you can be and get to know who you really are. When it comes to falling in love, you don’t want to rush it. You will know when the time is right for you. After you find that one person who is everything you have ever dreamed of, all the time you spent on your own will be worth it.
AdventureTime5
November 18th, 2018 7:22am
Invest in yourself and do the activities you want to do. Being single should not be a sad emotion or a negative thought. Embrace being free and independent and take this opportunity to do whatever you want. It could be travelling, living in another country or city, learn a new skill, invest in an interest or hobby, meet new people or volunteer. Learn how to feel comfortable in your own skin and explore what you want to do in life. Find something you are passionate about and build your own empire. Learn how to love yourself first and put yourself first.
Anonymous
December 8th, 2018 8:56pm
Find strength within youself! Do things that you enjoy and can take time with yourself. Get to know youself better and grow to be content with being alone. Finding purpose in another person is tricky anf can leave you heartbroken but if you are comfortable with yourself than perhaps you can feel happy about being single. Being single can also create more time for you to be with friends and family that you love. You have more time to dedicate to things that make you happy. There can be alot of joy created from being out of a relationship, especially if it is toxic.
Anonymous
December 16th, 2018 8:15pm
Being a happy single person comes from loving and accepting yourself. Many of us want a significant other and if you have recently had a breakup then the single life can feel kind of lonely. Indulging in hobbies and interests can be fulfilling as well as trying new things, meeting new people and spending time with friends and family. It can take time to get used to the single life but surrounding yourself with the right people and taking part in activities you enjoy can help you on your journey to happiness. It is also a good time to get to know yourself.
BlankaM
January 9th, 2019 9:49pm
Self love. 100%. Focusing on yourself, finding new hobbies, occupying yourself by doing something new. You will soon discover that you are amazing on your own and you DO NOT need something to complete you because you complete yourself on your own by being you and exploring yourself and your talents. It is so important to look after yourself, spiritually and mentally, so take some time off to get to know yourself, your thoughts and just focus on being you! Being single is a wonderful opportunity to not worry about anything but yourself, and this part of your life is so essential in order to find your true passions.
Anonymous
February 10th, 2019 5:22pm
Well, first of all there is always hope of one day finding the right person and if you are still single you know there is actually someone else who is single because there is a mate for everybody out there regardless of how you look or how broke you might be. I know that God made a mate for everybody just like He did with all the animals that Adam named. So, please keep looking because your mate is out there, The problem might be that you are over looking your mate because of high expectation or possibly wanting a perfect situation. There are no perfect people or perfect situation. You must be willing to try to grow together with a person and sometimes growing mean being placed in a different soil to grow. I'm not talking about people of the same skin complexion but all people, who are of a dating age to be in a relationship to date.
BlakeKai
February 21st, 2019 8:43pm
Think about being single in a positive way. People who are single typically live longer, are happier, and take better care of themselves. You can accomplish anything you want and in some situations you do not need someone to hold you down. You can always find your one and only however it’s important to know who you are and what you want before you can involve yourself with anyone else into your life. It’s fine to be single just keep your eyes peeled for that special someone that could end up right in front of you. Stay being you
Wittie96
May 5th, 2019 11:20am
Being happy with being single is hard in todays society. We are trained from a young age that in order to be happy we need someone to complete us and that is a very dangerous line of thinking. Once I got over my fear of being alone I realized that being single wasn't that bad. I went out and did things that I enjoyed. I treated myself like I would treat a partner and learned to truly love myself. In this I found happiness and in time a relationship with someone who complemented me instead of completeing me. I hope this helps you a little bit. Being single gives you time to figure out who you are, what you want in a relationship and have fun.
calmSnowflake55
May 12th, 2019 4:43am
when you are single, you can focus mainly on bettering yourself. you need to find time to make yourself happy. after you find happiness in yourself then you can worry about being happy with someone else. being single doesn’t necessarily mean that you’re sad. and being taken doesn’t necessarily mean that you’re happy. you just have to work at your own pace and respect your heart enough to let it take time to love itself. i’ve always been told in life, you can’t love anyone unless you love yourself. and that is honestly the key to a good happy long lasting relationship is loving yourself first. so love yourself first and you’ll be happy whether or not you’re in a relationship 🙂
brightMango41
May 16th, 2019 2:24am
Use this time to develop your own interests. Find things you enjoy or learn a new skill. Take time to find some kind of community--a group of friends or something with people who share common interests. Think about things you would like to change for yourself and set achievable goals. All of these things will help you build confidence and feel good about yourself. If you change the question a bit, that can help too. Try to think of it as "how can I most effectively use this time?" Or "What is within my power to change right now to improve my life?"
kendogblaze
May 17th, 2019 11:25am
Think of why you feel the way you do about being single. Are you afraid of being alone? Do you wish you had someone with which to share your emotions, thoughts, or life? Or do you want to remain single? Whatever it is, know that being single isn't necessarily a bad thing. There's a lot of pressure in society seek a relationship, whether it's through your friends, family, or social media. The truth is, a lot of people aren't ready for a relationship or don't even want one, and that's okay. Don't worry about trying not to be single. Try to think of what you can do with the extra time you have as someone single. Take this time to invest in yourself. Pick up a new hobby, go out with your friends, or meet new people. Build yourself. If you do want a relationship in the future, when the time's right and you feel that you're ready for a relationship, go out and give it a try. One last thing, don't compare yourself to others, especially people in relationships on social media, because everything is not always as it seems. Don't rush. You have time, and when the time is right, you'll know.
Hanaa00
June 12th, 2019 11:22pm
Being single... honestly, i think it’s the BEST time to start focusing on being happy, not about being single, but simply while being single. Let me quickly explain. Now that you’re single, you get to focus more on your friends rather than just on that one person, you get to spend more time with people who bring joy to your life, you get to do things that YOU are passionate about, and most importantly, you get to focus on accepting yourself and loving yourself the way you are. And the moment you find a way to love yourself unconditionally and independently of anyone else, you will also be happy about being single... or just happy in general 💗
maddisonblogs0
June 22nd, 2019 11:50pm
Go to partys, stay with your friends, do what you like to do, read, dance, sing, searching a talent, it is simple if you put your effort. You have to be yourself always and not get carried away by others. If the others are in a relationship, you must be happy for them, that blue prince will come to you who will make you really happy, and you will be happy about it. If you love yourself, there you can just love another, never before, and that must have time, it is not easy. But if you're single, your quiet, that man would come
serenitynyx22
June 23rd, 2019 6:22am
I know a lot of people who are happy being single. They do the things they want to do. Say example, you want to go to the mall or the bookstore, and when you were in a relationship, you had to keep changing plans. But now you're single, you could do anything you want. I'm not saying that being single is the best thing nor am I saying be single forever. To be happy being single is a choice too. Do what you love to do. Do the things you wished you could do when you weren't single. It takes time, but nobody is not in a hurry. I hoped that helped.
Anonymous
July 5th, 2019 12:34pm
See how it benefits you so much. You can dig your potential without having anything that will hinder you from growing up. You can find your real self. Being single is not bad. I'm more concerned if someone simultaneously wants to get into a relationship. I'm afraid that they can't love themselves first that they need others to say they love them. You can stay single, until you find the one. You don't have to go through break ups. Or couple fights. You won't always receive the love you deserve. But it's alright. You just need to see you're worthy enough. That you don't need to worry about that certain someone not loving you.
supportivekayla
July 6th, 2019 10:08pm
Break ups can be very difficult since you are so used to their company and spending so much time together. Now, you have to figure out how to live your life without them. Being happy while single is possible. Find things that you enjoy doing, people you enjoy doing them with, and keep your mind occupied. Being single doesn’t mean you are alone, because there are many people that care for you and love you. Don’t let your mind wander into places in which you would be unhappy. Don’t be afraid to ask questions, we are all here to listen.
tacobella4
July 11th, 2019 5:16am
For me, what I’ve come to learn is relationships come with A LOT of responsibility. And now after breaking up with my ex, I’m happy to FINALLY bask in the beauties of the single life. It comes down to this: What we see about other people in their relationships is only the tip of the iceberg. All we see on social media is other people having fun, making out, and going to fancy restaurants. What we don’t see are the arguments, insecurities, or incompatibilities within the relationship. We also don’t see the constant stress endured by each person over having to manage someone else’s emotions. When you’re single, that doesn’t mean you have to be completely free of love or dating. You can join a dating website, get closer to someone you know, or meet someone new tomorrow. However, what it DOES mean is that, for a short and beautiful period of time, you have yourself—ALL TO YOURSELF. Take this time to find a new hairstyle, flirt with who you like, watch that TV show your friends are always trying to get you to watch, or simply practice the art of self-care. You will most definitely find love in your life. You will MOST DEFINITELY get tied town into a relationship down the line, and when that happens, it’ll be amazing. Why rush?
LampIntheRain
July 21st, 2019 6:37am
Being single I enjoy my work, my hobby. Being single gives me more open minded towards the things that I want to do. I can also indulge in activities both social and others without being stopped by someone. Being single also helps me to increase my self independence and also the self esteem to self motivate myself. Being self and living freely is the most important quality that any one should conceive. Single life have many benefits like creating your own world of thoughts and thinking which not only nourishes you, but the world included society shall benefit , peace.
lisalovescats98
August 2nd, 2019 12:29am
You do not need to be in a relationship to be happy. In fact, it's hard to be in a healthy relationship when you're not happy yourself. Working on yourself is the best thing you can do. Try to find your true self, find new hobbies and interests, focus on your mental health, which is a major key to happiness in the long run and you'll feel so much better. You can't love someone else if you dont love yourself. Make you a priority, not other people. That only sacrifices your own sanity and happiness. Love yourself before you love others.
Anonymous
August 17th, 2019 1:26am
Learn to be contented and being happy being with yourself. Cause there is nothing wrong with being single. Actually its more fun cause you can do what you want to do. And you're probably more free than when you were in a relationship. You have friends, enjoy their company. Appreciate their presence. Do something you've always wanted to do. Treat yourself as how you would treat your special someone. There are lots of ideas but find one where you see yourself happy and contented. Do something that excites you. That's the most important thing anyway. I'm hoping for the best. Have fun!
Anonymous
August 18th, 2019 1:21pm
By realizing a relationship isn't the only source of happiness you need for a healthy lifestyle. Also, if you can't love yourself, how could you ever love someone else?? Being single is a time when you can take care of yourself and you can go out with anyone and experiment with a lot of things:), which you can't do at least in a traditional relationship where going out with someone else than your partner can be considered cheating. Take your time and build up on yourself!
Daishy
September 6th, 2019 7:09pm
LOVE yourself and always remind yourself that your happiness does not depend on anyone but yourself. Eat right, have fun and stay positive at all times. Learn to do things by yourself, it helps you improve in dependency. Find your happy place. Start away from what ever will steal your joy. Use your imagination always. Never be afraid to try something new, maybe like a sport or some activity. Learn and keep yourself busy. Being busy is a great way to get your mind off some stuffs so I'll suggest doing some volunteer work. And remember, always be yourself and love yourself too!
Jalyn906
September 12th, 2019 7:34am
I think you can feel happy about being single is that 1. you don’t have to be worrying about if this person is doing this or that 2. you get to focus on yourself more 3. You stress less 4. You don’t have to be questioned about certain stuff like where are you going? Who are you going with? Is there gonna be boys there? Wear something different your showing too much skin I feel like that’s some ways you can be happy about being single cause you don’t have to constantly be stress about another person you get more time to focus on yourself
SmallLouise1904
September 19th, 2019 9:12pm
There are many ways you could feel happy being single. Like my granny told me theres always time to be together so you should cherish the time that you are alone. And you don't actually have to be all alone while being single. You can spend more time with friends and not to worry about being late to a date. Also you don't have to share food which is a very good plus. And if you want more company, you could get a pet so you still are single but you have someone who waits you at home to be cuddled.
Anonymous
October 9th, 2019 7:43am
Because happiness and joy lie within. We make the choice, not someone else. We decide to smile at others or to be angry with them. Someone else can make us happy, but we don't need a partner to feel lifted. A good partner helps but we have the strength to stand on our own. A partner brings good and bad, no one is perfect. You don't need to feel left out when you are the only single person in your friends' group. Only if you want to. We can be perfectly happy, as long as we want it. We decide.
brianna67
October 9th, 2019 10:33pm
I highly, highly recommend the book 'How to be Single and Happy' by Jennifer Taitz. She's a clinical psychologist and expert on the topic. The book changed my life and the title should really be "How to Happy and Fulfilled." To summarize the book, it teaches you other ways to fulfill your life without a partner and to start doing what you'd want to do with a partner. It's especially helpful to work through any dating anxieties or fear of ending up alone. And as an added bonus, focusing on yourself and giving your life more meaning might end up making you a more attractive partner to attract others!
Anonymous
October 27th, 2019 9:36pm
You can focus on yourself and better yourself. You need to make yourself before someone else does. You dont need anyone besides yourself. Love yourself before you love anyone else. You can take time to yourself to find what you like and what youre into. Dont force a relationship let a good healthy one come to you. You can be happy and not have to worry what goes on in someone elses life. Focus on what makes you happy and how you can better yourself because in the end all you have is yourself. Youre the only thing that matters.
Anonymous
November 14th, 2019 1:36pm
There is something called "capacity of being alone". I believe a big number of us is raised without this capacity developed, which makes us always look for a person that will fulfill us. If we are looking for someone to fulfill us, we should know this is a never ending fight with windmills. What we should do is examine how we feel about being alone, being self-sufficient, what does being in a relationship really mean to us and what are we running away from by running into a relationship without consciousness. So this is some deep work to be done, but you are not the only one :) good luck with your quest towards the capacity of being alone!
dancingriver22x
December 21st, 2019 5:48pm
Being single is like flying with no one holding you down. You are free to work on yourself at the pace you want. To me, a single woman, i feel free and capable of anything. Being single actually increases social connections and helps you develop stronger friendships with others. You can learn more about yourself when you are single and take time to explore the different aspects of your life that make you who you are. You have less regrets as it is proven that a couple loose the sense of risk taking when together. Many people in relationships can almost vanish to the point where there whole personality is lost. So, speaking as a single woman, I love being single!