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How can I stop feeling like no one will ever compare to the boyfriend/girlfriend I broke up with?

13 Answers
Last Updated: 02/05/2018 at 5:08pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Amelia Winsby, PsyD

Psychologist

I often work with clients who experience a wide range of emotions and difficulties. I am non-judgmental and enjoy working with individuals from all walks of life.

Top Rated Answers
Raylen
May 11th, 2015 10:13am
Just keep remember that maybe what you had with him/her was beautiful but it 's just the end of a beautiful chapter not the end of the book, don't stop and continue writing your book because they're much things you haven't discovered yet :)
amiableAmy
June 1st, 2015 6:26am
Try to see your new romantic prospects/partners as individuals in their own right, instead of just replacements trying to fill the void left by your ex. These people will have their own merits & their own faults, just as you & all of the rest of do. Just as every person is unique in their thoughts, feelings, qualities & actions, every relationship is unique. Don't set unachievable or unnecessary standards for your new partner & relationship based on your experiences with others in the past.
Anonymous
December 4th, 2015 6:12pm
You have to keep your head and think positive. Eventually things will get better and you will find someone who is better for you. It may not seem like it now but it will happen. Or if the relation ship you had with you ex was really meant to be then maybe one day it will happen.
hawaii5o
March 14th, 2016 9:55am
that is completely normal, you will feel like that for quite a while but it will go away and you'll find someone better
Anonymous
February 15th, 2016 4:06am
Try your best to get over that boyfriend/girlfriend before you date anybody else. Chances are that if you are comparing them to someone else, you aren't ready to date. But eventually you will find a person that you won't compare them to. It might not be soon but who knows!
Hailey1994
February 25th, 2015 5:24pm
One of the most encouraging things ive ever learned is that no two loves are the same. Your last love will never compare to your first love and no other love will be the same as another. It helps to open your mind and heart to feeling new things and stop expecting it to feel exactly the same as it had before
Anonymous
June 22nd, 2015 12:53am
That's a tough one, especially when the one being compared to is your first or greatest love. But like all things, it takes time to heal a broken heart. Comparing is not healthy because it puts you in a mindset where your current boyfriend/girlfriend seems not to be good enough for you and that can weaken or ruin a relationship because it will seem like you do not appreciate your partner for who he or she is.
Anonymous
June 13th, 2017 8:39am
After a breakup, it is very common and natural to feel like you will never find someone as amazing as they were. Life doesn't stop for anyone. It goes on. Change is inevitable. We meet new people all the time. Everyone in our life is there for a purpose. Some people stay longer than others. I'm sure you will find someone :)
SourButSweetCandy
December 4th, 2017 10:09pm
have more self confidence in yourself and believe that you can get what you deserve or even more than you expect to have
Anonymous
February 25th, 2015 3:58am
Stop comparing everyone to your past, so you can look ahead to your further , that is how you'll be able to help
Anonymous
July 13th, 2015 2:26pm
Know that you will heal and it's normal to feel that way and know that you will eventually realise that it was not meant to be
Greatlistener87
July 4th, 2016 6:43am
You have to accept that there is a reason for your breakup and whatever that reason is you bf/gf that u have broken up with is not perfect for that reason and many more. Give the people out there a chance to show u that what you are looking for they have.
northernangel
February 5th, 2018 5:08pm
I’ve had this issue before. If my boyfriend did one thing I expected all my others to do that same thing. And if they didn’t I would convince myself they didn’t love me as much. Which is completely untrue. Comparing a current relationship with on who previously ended is the best to fast-track a breakup. Look at this new person as a different entity not just another boyfriend. Reminisce about your old lovers, but don’t forget to appreciate what you have in the present.