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How can i stop hurting over someone that possibly never cared about me or my existence at all?

14 Answers
Last Updated: 01/18/2021 at 5:37pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United Kingdom
Moderated by

Tara Davis, Doctorate in Counselling Psychology


I have worked successfully with a wide range of difficulties. Nothing is more important than developing a warm, compassionate relationship with someone you can trust

Top Rated Answers
January 18th, 2021 5:37pm
You can't forget some one you care that deeply about, but there are ways you can move on because you and I both know you deserve better. Right now it might be looking like you are drowning the pain just hit and ever time you think about it again, the cut re-opens. It's okay, this is perfectly normal. Now it's time to move on, that persons gone and most probobly enjoying their life. What's holding you back ? If you think that they are also suffering is just a bunch of fairy tales you came up with. Nothings holding you back to be you,to be happy. Being happy is a choice. Find happiness in the little things life has to offer find your inner passion. Something that brings warmth to your heart. Forget those who leave you and look for those who want to be found.
February 22nd, 2015 10:46pm
Time, and friends that do care about you. Time is the best, because the severity of your feelings should fade over time. Friends can also help, because they can support you in a way that does make you feel important. 7 cups has self help guides on coping with loneliness and surviving breakups, which can be helpful. If neither of those work, seeing a therapist to talk about this would also help. They can give you professional advice on moving forward.
February 23rd, 2015 4:18pm
There's no easy answer for that. All hurts pass in time, and the best way I can think of is to focus on you rather than your hurts. You are a valued and unique individual. Always remember that.
June 5th, 2015 12:51am
This saying applies to multiple people "ex's are ex's for a reason". An ex-friend, ex-colleague or an ex-partner, for example. You're number one, you always will be. By that I mean, think of yourself first. Your health, your well being and your life. Don't put any of that on the line for someone who you know could use that against you.
June 10th, 2015 9:04pm
it hurts. However, it is about them and not you. Don't take it personally. That's the challenge. It does in a sense leave the door open wider to those that do care and are supportive and caring when you accept that for whatever reason, those who essentially abandon you have their own issues and if the experience is negative let them go.
June 23rd, 2015 5:23am
Take that energy and put it to positive use. Forget those who hurt you but learn from the mistakes.
November 9th, 2015 11:02pm
first off you need to do the caring for yourself and your existence before anyone else can appreciate you and your existence. it all starts with you dear, love yourself more than anybody else can love you and you will never hurt over someone else's under-appreciation of you. You do not deserve to hurt over someone that does not appreciate you.
November 16th, 2015 6:23am
The hardest thing to do is to let go. So the best way to deal is to find ways to just let go. You are the key to your own happiness.
September 13th, 2016 3:27am
I personally think that most of the time getting over people gets tougher in such situations because we cared or loved them more than they did us. But here my theory, when love and care about someone you don't have to except in back. Just be glad you did care. That you opened up. Don't expect anything back. Whe you think that way, I believe it's easier to let go. Almost becomes a happy memory. A memory where you learned to care. "It is better to have loved and lost than have not loved at all."
October 31st, 2016 1:31am
Time and patience, as cliched as it may sound. Use all that hurt and pain to work harder and be better than you ever were. Years down the line when they see that, they will regret not giving you the attention you deserved.
June 5th, 2017 4:58pm
It's a hard and long journey, to overcome the absence of someone we really care about and there is no cure for that pain. Time heals those wounds, slowly, as long as you look forward and surround yourself with people who appreciate you, If that person already forgot about you, then it's wasted energy to still cling to them. Sometimes things are not meant to be and when you understand that you also grow stronger.
July 16th, 2018 7:46pm
I’ve also experienced this. Do you know what to do. Either go out, have fun, take your mind off of it. Or tell a friend or a family member about it and eat ice cream. Always works!
August 20th, 2018 1:19pm
You can begin to put a stop to it by keeping in mind, that no two individuals share the exact feelings. Unfortunately, not everyone will give us the love we deserve or desire. Surround yourself with the people that love you, read inspirational books and take note that you’re are going to make yourself responsible for your own happiness. I know it can be difficult to adjust, but all things eventually fall into place with patience and thoughtfulness. Be kind to yourself and love yourself first. I wish you the very best in all the choices you make. You can do it!!
May 26th, 2020 8:53pm
It can be really hard to move on at times, especially when you cared for the person. It is even harder when the relationship is more one-sided. Even though the person may have never possibly cared about you, that doesn't make what you are feeling any less real or important. I know this is a cliche, but things do take time to heal. There was a time where I had to move on from a friendship where I cared more about our relationship than he did. It was really tough to do since at times I kept wondering why I was so naive to believe he cared about me at all. Once I realized that I wasn't wrong for trying to keep the friendship going it became easier to heal and move on, but it did take a while.