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How can I tell my boyfriend how I feel about him?

240 Answers
Last Updated: 05/13/2022 at 4:15pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Elaine Kish, LMSW

Clinical Social Work/Therapist

My goal is to treat clients with respect and compassion. I am a supportive, strengths-based therapist with experience in treating mood disorders, grief, and trauma.

Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
April 26th, 2018 4:18am
It’s actually pretty easy. Just be completely honest with him and tell him everything on your mind. Sometimes this is done easier over text.
Bigheart4all
May 5th, 2018 10:30pm
Just tell him how you feel. Being open and honest with each other is key for communication. Maybe have a sit down and talk to each other as much as you can.
Anonymous
May 10th, 2018 11:56am
Make him sit down, keep your cell phones and other devices aside, and talk. Talk about how you feel about him and your relationship, what makes you happy, what annoys you, you are grateful, you are sad, tell him. Ask him about his feelings, listen to him, understand him try to bring positive changes in you. Grow together. Communication is the key.
Anonymous
May 13th, 2018 5:58pm
just be straightforward about it , time flies you don"t know what's gonna happen I suggest you tell him how you're feeling and don"t worry about his reaction , because t least you will have an answer
Anonymous
May 16th, 2018 11:55am
Ask for a good time to speak to him. Write down what you want to tell him before hand, be specific and non aggressive. Tell him in a calm voice and manner when the time comes.
Anonymous
May 23rd, 2018 4:14am
Think about what do you feel and why. Then take your time to find the words he will understand and won’t make him overreact. Once you have figured out what and how you would explain him your feelings, plan a meeting in a quiet place where you want be interrupted.
Anonymous
May 23rd, 2018 1:01pm
Usually, I would just advice you to go straight up to him and sit down and have a serious talk. if you truly love each other, there is nothing you can't talk about.
Jacobbjackson
May 24th, 2018 10:25pm
Just be straight forward and tell him. It’s best to have a open and honest communication. If I were him, I’d want you to truthfully tell me how you feel about me.
thethingwithfeathers98
May 26th, 2018 9:25am
Direct communication is always the best way to go. It is important now and then to remind your boyfriend how you feel, even if you are both secure in the relationship, so both of you remember why you are together.
Anonymous
June 16th, 2018 7:56pm
Having an open honest conversation is key. Both of you should sit down and really talk about how the two of you are feeling.
TwylyghtMyst
June 17th, 2018 5:06pm
Start by asking if I may speak with him for a moment then begin by saying I feel.. and explain how you feel with out being accusing or putting him on the defensive if it is about a problem. Or if it is because you like him then Start off the same way and tell him!
courageousRose78
June 20th, 2018 2:33am
Make sure you both are in a place where you conversation will be the current priority. If he is busy it may not be the best time. Also make sure that you are clear with your intentions.
Anonymous
July 8th, 2018 2:12am
This is a great question! It's important to let those that we care about know what's going on inside of our heads. With that said, it's best to just do what feels right for you. You know best what needs to be said, and how your boyfriend will take it.
Anonymous
July 8th, 2018 7:58am
Put yourself in his shoes. Think if you were him and your partner did not tell you how they felt how would you feel?
DanishPotato
July 9th, 2018 8:55pm
The best way i've found is just grab a pen and paper and think about him and then just write down everything that comes to mind then try to write it into something readable and refine it a bit might takes a few times of rewriting but it always works for me to put it on paper :)
peacefulrose22
July 11th, 2018 1:37am
if you truly love your boyfriend you should be able to be honest always with him. i am with my boyfriend and we are happy !
Eleuthromaniac
July 13th, 2018 3:26am
Open and honest communication is KEY to a healthy and sustainable relationship, at whatever age it is. If you find yourself stuck like this you should definitely try and sit him down, one-on-one and ask him to simply listen to you without speaking in, or you can even write a hand-made letter and hand it to him when he isn’t home, like in his mailbox or door step. Sometimes talking to your significant other about your feelings can be challenging but the rewards of it after it is said can be the best.
LovingPhantom
July 15th, 2018 4:00am
Although it is difficult to be so vulnerable about your emotions, it can come out with good things. The first thing to acknowledge is that he may not feel exactly like you do. For example, you might tell him you love him and he might not be ready to do that. It's nothing personal against you, it's just people come to terms and gain those emotions at different times. And if you tell him how you feel, expect awkwardness. It's okay if it's odd. But it's open, it's vulnerable. You may feel dissuaded from their response, but it's recommended you ignore the possibility of a not so positive response and focus on the strength within you to be vulnerable. It is EXTREMELY hard to be vulnerable with another person, so good on you to do that. And how to do so? Just tell them. Call, text, do it in person, whatever is comfortable for you. But doing it in person would delivery the message more genuinely.
RumpleSteeleSkin
July 21st, 2018 9:36pm
You can make a special dinner, and after you both eat have a light hearted chat outside or in an area where it's quiet and no distractions. Maybe you can buy or make a card and share your thoughts that way. Hope these ideas can help you.
ParisHereToHelp
July 30th, 2018 4:34pm
Firstly identify the words to express how you feel about him, take time to think about the thoughts and emotions you have for him. Once you have gathered your ideas, ease into the conversation with related topics, such as how you have been feeling lately and how the relationship has been going in your eyes. Once you feel comfortable enough in the conversation, slowly start to let out all of your feelings and express to him your emotions.
Anonymous
August 1st, 2018 8:15am
First, offer a private and direct conversation, make sure face to face conversation because if you see their face, you can know they are listening or not. Second, talk in a gentle way. Tell them how you feel (happy, sad, pleasant or unpleasant... etc.) Then ask him how does he feel after you tell him about this
Eveninglivvie
August 2nd, 2018 10:51am
There are several ways you could try to tell him in a letter or over a candle lit dinner. The possibilities are endless
Anonymous
August 10th, 2018 5:36am
Honest conversation is the key to a good relationship. You could first not down or practice your points in from of mirror and then sit in a comfortable environment and talk in a friendly manner about your concern.
goldenApple91
August 15th, 2018 3:32am
Good feelings should be easy to share unless he doesn’t want a relationship. Bad feelings are more difficult and you want to be careful not to say negatives things that you’ll regret. Sometimes letting those slide and turning your attention to something positive is best.
frostymango546
September 5th, 2018 10:50am
You can tell her how much you love him and make him feel that he is special for you. You can make him believe that he is perfect for you with his imperfections and you love him the way he is. You can tell him that your world is incomplete without him. Happiness and success has no meaning without his support. And you want to love him throughout your life and want him to love you for this life. Your love is beyond these worldy things because you see stars in his eyes and want him to see galaxies in her eyes too
sereneFireworks45
November 7th, 2018 11:53pm
Just be honest. Opening yourself up to being vulnerable invites him into that space where you can both be honest. Are there things you're worried about? How he might react for example? Often these fears are not realised when you actually get to talk. Being vulnerable is scary, but unless you express yourself, you won't know what he is thinking either! He might be sitting there wondering how to open up to you as well! I hope it goes well, but even if it doesn't you won't be left wondering about what might have happened or how he might feel.
amazingRainbow20
November 21st, 2018 3:42am
I know it takes a lot of courage sometimes to say things that are on your heart, but once you do it’s like a weight is lifted off your shoulder, and you no longer have to hide or fake how you truly feel. In my opinion that’s the best part of being in a relationship, having someone you can go to whenever you need to talk, and someone who accepts you. Even if it’s something they won’t like, you should talk to them about it, because you could just be second-guessing yourself. Just breathe, and tell him how you really feel.
ryanjsmith
November 21st, 2018 8:25pm
That heavily depends upon what you are telling him, if positive this should be fairly easy, simply telling him how you feel straight up is plenty and he will love you for it. On the other hand, if it's more of a discussion about a problem in the relationship or the fact you simply want to split up, it becomes a much more sensitive subject and much more difficult to work with. If you need to tell him something serious, personally I would recommend you to do it in person as this will usually help him come to terms with things and make him feel better about it in general. Just ensure you aren't going to hurt him any more than is needed.
HamRadio4Life
December 6th, 2018 9:49pm
Think of what comes to mind when you think of him. Ask yourself what it was that attracted you to him in the first place. Think about the small things he does that make you smile or hurt your feelings. By doing that, you have a the beginning of a solid foundation on starting the conversation and being able to hold his attention while you say what you feel is needed to be said and how it needs to be said. Also, ask yourself why you need to tell your boyfriend how you feel. Is there something wrong? If it's just to express love, then you'll be good to go!
littlegenius
February 3rd, 2019 5:39pm
Being true to yourself is always the best way to make yourself happy. So please open up your true feelings to your boyfriend. One tip to make this work better. Please choose a time when he has a good mood with less anxiety. So that he can be a good listener and things will be worked out. Sometime, when he avoid to listen to you and it may not mean that his feelings on you is decreasing time by time. But he may be very tired from a long day. He must have his own stress (work, family matter and etc). That's why choosing the best timing and situation to open up your feeling to him plays vital role.