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How can you tell that you have really moved on?

186 Answers
Last Updated: 11/19/2020 at 2:19am
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Lindsay Scheinerman, MA, LPC

Licensed Professional Counselor

My work with clients is to help them recognize and build on their strengths to find solutions for the conflicts presented in their lives.

Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
June 14th, 2018 3:30am
You can tell that you've moved on if you have no sustained challenging thoughts or emotions when you think of a prior partner.
Anonymous
June 27th, 2018 9:27pm
When you feel you can breathe. And you feel more happy. When things seem good. You will know the best is yet to come.
generousPrince61
July 7th, 2018 3:15pm
For me, I know I've moved on when I've stopped asking myself this question. Moving on is a process. We take the first steps by reaching out to family, friends, and other social support. Sometimes this involves counselling. But it always involves a period of self-evaluation. There are hard days and good days. The mind is an incredibly resilient thing, and with enough time and as you continue to work on yourself, you will move on.
Olivia9959
July 20th, 2018 8:50pm
You can tell that you have moved on from someone when you know longer have interest in them and are focused on other things.
Anonymous
July 26th, 2018 5:19pm
Ways to tell that you have really moved on is if you don’t think about them as often as you’d do before.
Mia1602
July 27th, 2018 6:01am
I believe you can tell you have really moved on when there is no longer a void to be filled in the missing piece, you have accepted how things are now and are happy to live with this change with no worries.
archiesnapx
August 1st, 2018 6:57am
Once you have stopped pining over the one that got away, you'll really know that you have moved on.Moving on is not something that will happen instantaneously. It might take months or even years in some cases to finally forget that person. You can’t just decide that on this-and-this date. And finally when you have completed the whole process, youll realize that moving on was the best thing that ever happened to you. :)
Talking28
August 5th, 2018 4:28pm
I have struggled with the same quesiton not so long ago! The answer is rather simple - when you are indifferent to your ex. When you do not feel anything when you see them, hear about them or when they meet someone new. Bonus level - feeling nothing when you think of them making love to someone else.
Miyathetzu15
August 12th, 2018 11:51am
Someone who has moved on usually don't feel the need to check their ex's social media. Also they feel indifferent toward their ex; not upset about them dating someone else.
Tyedyedbutterfly65
August 12th, 2018 10:57pm
By getting back to living my life and not allowing people to hurt me and bring me down , to forgive and let things go.
blissfulPanda89
August 18th, 2018 8:32pm
I feel the release when I fully move on and recover from a situation or time when I can look back on that time period and have a positive response within me and it wont hold me back in anyway. Things will always hurt but fight it, fight back for what you want to move forward to. You will never overcome that fear if you don't make it fear you! Be happy within yourself. You have support, you are loved, you are worth everything you aspire to be and want. If anything means more then you always have the past to push into the future.
softukulele
August 31st, 2018 11:01pm
Minimal to no thoughts about the person /time period /situation. Positive habits like journaling, drinking water, eating sleeping, general self-care and work responsibility are no longer interrupted by the person /time period /situation of thoughts of them. A feeling of freedom or release, a feeling of weight lifted off of your shoulders. Engaging in positive, healthy, pure and constructive behavior and coping mechanisms instead of turning back to the person/ the time /situation. It can be difficult to tell if you have ever truly moved on from a person but hopefully these can help guide you out of that situation!
Saltybuttercup
September 19th, 2018 6:05am
If you don't get anxious when the name of the person or any situation is mentioned. You are able to look back and smile at the good memories. You don't stalk them on the social media anymore. You operate as a normal human being, you are able to laugh,love yourself, concentrate on things. You do't accuse yourself of being at fault, you stop regretting and happily move forward to take down what future has to offer you. You do not get angry, irritated, moody over things that shouldn't trigger you in general. You are able to keep your mind calm, yourself happy.
RippedWings
September 30th, 2018 1:01pm
Moving on is an incredibly hard thing to do, especially when the situation had such a great impact on you. It will be forever printed in your brain, in your essence. You can't erase your own memories. You must find out how to live with them, buried inside for the rest of your life. You can't control that but you can learn how to control the impact they have over you. Accept the past and let it go. Nobody deserves to suffer. When I begin to know myself better, that's when I move on. I ask myself questions like: "Did I deserve it?" or "Could I have change things?". The past cannot be changed but repeated all over again until it is understood and accepted. I've moved on when I started caring more about myself. When I learned how to love myself.
magnanimousWinter46
October 4th, 2018 11:22pm
You can tell you have really moved on from something when you no longer have regrets about it, you have no more shoulda coulda woulda, you accept the turnout of the situation. When you can think about that person, place or thing and not have those exact same emotions as you once did. People associate moving on with a negative feeling when In reality being complacent is the bad part, you should always want to be moving and moving on. Your mindset should be evolving, your physical body should be crawling/walking/running/swimming/ but moving. These are all MY opinions and your life is yours to live in any way you please! So keep living
AJW7526
October 11th, 2018 11:09am
Moving on is a process that sometimes doesn't have an end. It is also relative depending on what you are moving on from. Often moving on refers to a breakup from a romantic partner, and sometimes people define themselves as having moved on when they are able to be completely happy in a relationship with a new person. This isn't to say that they don't reminisce about memories with an ex, but they are able to be vulnerable and loving with a new partner. I personally have not experienced a breakup, but I know I have not moved on when a person and I stop speaking but that person will always be connected to a part of my life. I find that this is the case with family members, because we will always have a relationship by blood and they will be part of my life no matter what, even if it's not a stable relationship.
Missionmagic101
October 18th, 2018 1:33pm
You can tell you have moved on when you feel at peace with yourself and thinking about the issue doesn't hurt you or affect you in a negative way anymore. Even if you remember all the pain it caused you, you can still acknowledge that you came a long way and did your best to overcome it. Moving on doesn't mean your forget what happen. I don't think it means you can forgive people, it just means that you accept that you can't change the past and are working towards a better future while taking care and simply being at peace with yourself.
Anonymous
October 20th, 2018 3:20pm
Is this a relationship orientated question? I’ll pretend that it is. In essence, you’ve moved on when you aren’t fixated on them with strong emotions anymore, including love and hate. You’ll know it’s happening when you think of them less and less. You may occasionally reflect on your relationship together, but it will be more rational and educational instead of blame and guilt directed. You forgive yourself for actions that you couldn’t have done better considering the circumstances. You don’t fear the news that they’ve found someone else. You accept that it ended and, if it was on good terms, may even care for them platonically.
Calmsoul1515
October 30th, 2018 4:38pm
First of , i'm sorry to hear about your breakup. If we talk about the major sign that shows you have moved on is that you've deleted all pictures of / with him . You have stopped checking his status or last seen (from wherever you were secretly following him/her) . Now , if you have stopped thinking about his "interests" in everything like his special things don't trigger you anymore then you have MOVED on ! And if you have stopped the ritual of reading through his text messages in bed at night, and instead you’re reading Jane Austen's classic, Pride and Prejudice , then you have definitely MOVED ON ! Now you’re emotionally stable enough to watch The Notebook again and you decide his surname really doesn’t suit you. Plus , you have changed your relationship status to SINGLE!!!!!!!!
BubbleOfSupport
November 11th, 2018 5:04pm
Once you finally focus on yourself. You know you moved on, when you're able to look in the mirror and smile. You know you moved on when you stop hearing all the voices in your head saying you're not good enough. You moved on when you're finally happy and when you can finally stand the thought of being yourself. It can be really tough to move on from anyrhing. It really can. And it's normal. You know why? Because you're human. But once you finally do, your life become the most beautiful and comfortable place to be and you don't want to be anywhere else. You're beautiful. Stay yourself.
Anonymous
November 18th, 2018 1:49pm
When you longer care about what the other person thinks and you don't feel anything for them anymore. When you see them you don't care and just move past them i.e. they have no hold over you anymore. Moving on for me would be not feeling anything for the other person as if we are strangers.
greysonn
January 18th, 2019 3:21am
You can tell you really moved on when all of a sudden you do think about your situation and you realize that you haven’t even been thinking about it. Also, when you think of it too you’re not hit by those strong emotions caused by the situation. It is really difficult when that one situation is really bugging you and has you thinking. No matter what the situation is, self-care is so important. Once you start practicing your self-care and you distract yourself, you will notice you won’t be thinking about that one situation anymore. That feeling is going to be so comforting, and you’ll be proud of yourself too.
Anonymous
April 17th, 2019 10:53pm
you can tell that you really moved on when.. you feel light when you got to see your ex, when you are happy for him and his life without you, when you are happy without that person at your side, when you can smile, a genuine one around that person, when you can talk about that person without breaking down, when you are happy if you saw that person having a new one, and when you really are happy being alone and just living your life on its best that you can have and you can live without him by your side.
Annalece
April 20th, 2019 1:54am
During relationships of any kind we can somewhat get attached to someone. It then becomes difficult to know whether we are ever going to move on. At first it may hurt and that’s normal. But after if it still hurts it doesn’t mean you haven’t moved on. Depending on the situation, thinking about it may always make you upset or feel a certain way. You know you moved on when you are able to love someone else as much as that person. If you think of love and their name comes to your head first you haven’t moved on. Also if you still care about them being with someone else or you care about who they talk to then you haven’t moved on. By moving on you fully are able to say, I wish the best for you but I don’t need you anymore.
ingeniousPond13
May 1st, 2019 4:42am
when looking back no longer interest you. When the thoughts of the person or situation no longer in your mind. Basically, when you are in a comfortable space with positive energy doing whats best for you. Doing these things brings on good and positive energy and keeping the same energy of people around you brings good vibes to your spirit and life which is living. Now everyone might not be happy for you. But your happiness is all that's important do always what is best for you. Even if no one is standing with you. God is always with you.
Anonymous
May 3rd, 2019 4:30pm
I know that I have moved on when 1) Mention of his/her name doesn’t effect me. 2) I don’t avoid seeing or hearing about that person. 3) I am not interested in knowing how that person is doing or done recently. 4) When someone asked me about him/her, I don’t feel uncomfortable and give decent answer. 5) I am not interested in knowing what he/she is saying or has said about me. 6) Not comparing that person with new people in my life. 7) I am able to live my life without any interruption. 8) I am not feeling hurt or anger. 9) I am in touch with my friends and family.
SuperSandi
May 17th, 2019 10:04pm
Personally if I can look at my ex and genuinely wish them happiness in their relationships and endeavors ,without feeling sadness and/ or animosoty because I won't be a part of their journey, I know that chapter is finally closed and I can finally move on. It's a big step in stone that I feel one must go through in order to give your full potential to whatever your next task or relationship may be. Easier said than done, I feel it is essential to go through that process before starting anything new. It may take a while but I'd only hurt myself and others if I move on without closing the previous chapter
Anonymous
July 5th, 2019 7:53am
1. When you hear his/her name, you don't feel guilty or sad. You feel normal. 2. You don't cling onto your memories. But you cling onto life experiences when you spent your life with them. 3. You feel like you're doing great, even though you're alone. 4. You can love yourself more. Because when you moved on, you have time to repent your flaws and get better. 5. You don't feel like coping yourself inside your room or crying over something. Instead, you want to go outside and help many people, or meet friends. And moved one is all about finding your real self back. It's not always bad. It's actually a me-time that you've been asking for.
PoetaSinVersos
July 5th, 2019 2:07pm
I don't think we ever fully move on from losses and pain, so anytime something could trigger an emotional response. However, I think that there comes a milestone you hit eventually that works as a statement of your healing process. It's usually when you're capable of maybe not be /okay/ with what happened but be able to look back without absolute fear and sadness. You've "moved on" when you don't feel weighted down by your past, when you are able to create new meaning to your life and find happiness and joy in things that used to mildly trigger you back in the day.
sweetVision7332
September 9th, 2019 12:03am
How you can tell that you have really moved on is to liken the situation or circumstances to a scar on your skin. A scar reminds us that there was an incident/accident that cause the wound to appear. As time goes on we nurse the wound until it begins to heal. As the wound heals it turns into a scar. Most scars do not hurt unless you continue to re-injure it and turn it back into a wound. So how can you tell you’ve moved on? You are aware that situations and circumstances happened in the past (because you see the scar) but they no longer cause you an emotional energy (hurt, pain, agony, etc...).