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How can you unlove someone?

261 Answers
Last Updated: 07/17/2020 at 11:30am
How can you unlove someone?
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Jennifer Fritz, LMSW, PhD

Clinical Social Work/Therapist

Day to day life can be stressful and overwhelming and my strength is assisting my clients in a supportive, empowering and practical manner.

Top Rated Answers
Aemelliah
April 13th, 2016 1:36pm
you can not unlove someone.you can only love someone else more...either that someone is you or another soul
thaedeus93
April 15th, 2016 3:00pm
there's no one to "unlove" someone,if you care bout someone ,you care for whole life!!! never hate!!
Anonymous
April 16th, 2016 5:15am
On my opinion, you can never unlove someone you truly loved ince. You just learn to love them less, but in the end you would still care about the. You may not loce them the same way as before but you would love them differently. Like as a frind or as family.
Hazikk
April 21st, 2016 7:54pm
With time you will be able to detach yourself from this person , feelings will fade away eventually.
creativeSunshine46
April 22nd, 2016 2:16am
You can't, love is a deep emotional feeling and you can't remove it, you might hate someone but when there's hate, there's also love
goldenHeart58
April 23rd, 2016 8:04pm
I am not sure you can un-love someone totally; but time really does heal and even though its hard; you can learn to move on without them. Talking about your loss and pain will help you and help you realise that it takes two to cause relationship problems. Admit what you did wrong as well as what they did. Try not to feel bitter as that creates anger and sadness. Try to keep doing things that you enjoy and seeing friends etc Carry on as normal if you can! The feeling will pass.
Anonymous
April 23rd, 2016 8:13pm
You simply can't unlove someone you´ve loved. But you can let them go and at some point they won't be on your mind as much.
picturesque03afterthought
April 24th, 2016 1:50am
I am sorry to say this, but you cannot unlove someone. Once you have feelings for someone, even if it's as friends or more than that...they'll always be there. but the best thing you can do is to embrace those feelings and move on ( Don't suppress those feelings, because the weird things about feelings is that the more you suppress them, the more vigorously they attack back ) Love yourself more and know that there is something much better waiting for you (I know it's hard to believe that at times) Not all battles are worth fighting for, right?
shibainu
April 24th, 2016 3:57am
You can never unlove someone. I think if you love someone, they'll stay in your heart for the rest of your life. I think it doesn't lessen but you just outgrow it.
InspirationalListener99
April 25th, 2016 2:52am
Love is a strong feeling. Over time you will lose love for someone. And you will move on and find someone that makes you happy
booklover1224
April 27th, 2016 4:09pm
There is no way to fully "unlove" someone. As annoying as it can be to wait, time is one of the best cures for a broken heart.
Amber105
April 28th, 2016 5:18pm
It's almost impossible to un-love someone because you gave them your time, your love, and your life.
Anonymous
April 29th, 2016 5:04pm
From my personal experience, i would say, first of all you need to replace this person with someone else.
JDM108
April 29th, 2016 8:58pm
Love is your very nature, you can't control it, it controls you, as much as our limited mind doesn't like that at times. That being said, there are some new age processes to let go of old loves, like cord-cutting, that can be immensely helpful in moving on when its no longer appropriate to be thinking about someone all the time, when it doesn't serve you, or them.
KawaiiCandy
May 5th, 2016 6:33am
It's hard to unlove people. Especially if they have been a part of your life for a very long time. What you should do is forgive. Forgiveness solves a lot of problems.
Anonymous
May 5th, 2016 10:02pm
By falling in love with oneself, by promising our inner conscience that we will not remember the person anymore,by remembering that person's mistakes.
Anonymous
May 6th, 2016 9:59pm
I don't think you ever can. They will always be a part of you. The only thing you can do is try to make that piece become smaller
Sassy001
May 8th, 2016 8:58am
I don't think you can just unlove someone.You can't help the way you feel.Feelings aren't right or wrong,they just are.You can still love someone and not have them in your life though if they are wrong for you,cause you pain or problems.
Anonymous
May 12th, 2016 9:41pm
you cant, just remember when you did and try to remember the good things it is easier to move on that way
Anonymous
May 13th, 2016 1:40am
I guess you can't really "unlove" someone. It's just how you move on. When you love someone, a little part of them is still going to remain in your heart. But being able to love someone else and accepting the fact that you guys were once together and now aren't is the big step to moving on.
usefulPower63
May 13th, 2016 11:22am
Unloving someone is not a possible thing. Holding will not help you. Forgive and accept the fact that it's gone.people change. Forget and forgive
Anonymous
May 14th, 2016 3:00am
It's not so much about unloving someone as it is redefining the relationship so it's suitable for you. If the relationship is abusive then it might change from dependant to see every now and again or don't see at all. I'm unsure how to make the feeling go away, so instead I accept it and find a place in my heart for it.
blueskysmile777
May 18th, 2016 12:44am
If you really truly love somebody, I don't thinks it's possible to 'unlove' them. If there is a particular reason for a sudden want and need to detach your feelings from a specific person, I would say that it's because this person has either done something that has caused you upset, or made an exit from your life; in which case, I urge you to ask yourself if you truly ever loved them, or just felt a momentary strong connection with them, and possibly a dependence on the good they once fed you.
Ilianna12878
May 18th, 2016 2:57pm
Love doesn't have a cure when you love someone that's it there's no going back but there is a getting over. Love is powerful but some people don't really know what love is.
Anonymous
May 19th, 2016 5:10am
Unloving someone, if you are really determined could be possible. Time is a good factor in unloving someone. The more time stretches, the more you will forget the person. But to forget them, you have to change your mindset. Changing our mindset doesn't mean hating them. It's about acceptance. Acceptance of the fact that we are not in control of such things as love. Make it your principle not to invest emotions or stop investing emotions to things that we have no power to control., such as the other person's heart.
IreneDreamer
May 19th, 2016 12:47pm
I think that when you are trying to 'unlove' someone you can't think of it as just a button you can press and then everything will be over. It is a process and it takes time. Firstly it would be good to distance yourself from the person so you will be able to see things from a distance. That way you can clearly see the situation and how it didn't work out. Maybe this person harmed you in some way that now you are not able to see because you are still close to them. Fill your life with family, friends or maybe even new friends. It will be good to see how real love feels and be happy.
Anonymous
May 19th, 2016 9:58pm
you cant unlove someone but you can choose what you do about it . accept what things have become and do fun things with friends. you can even be friends with your exlover and if you choose to do that, moving on is a lot easier and less complicated , i know from experience.. sure you might get those feelings you got with them when you were together but its better then having them be your everything on day and a complete stranger the next day.
ZereftheHappyFairy
May 20th, 2016 2:48pm
You can never unlove somebody. When you fall in love with somebody they take a special place in your heart.
sereneBlue2121
May 23rd, 2016 3:20pm
It's not easy to fall out of love with somone, especially someone you spent a lot of time with and truly loved. It takes time, and fnding yourself agaist and who you are without that person that can help you move forwards. Let your friends halp you by talking to them about how you feel, and you'll be on the road to recovery before you know it!
Anonymous
May 25th, 2016 3:07pm
you can't make your self unlock someone it will take time. if you can remove yourself from situations where you'd see that person