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How do you know when it's time to break up with someone?

44 Answers
Last Updated: 04/11/2022 at 1:13am
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
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Myiesha Beard, LPC, NCC, CAMSII

Licensed Professional Counselor

I maintain a general practice providing services to children, adults, couples and families.

Top Rated Answers
GentleBreeze22
October 10th, 2016 12:11pm
If your partner doesn't seem to care when you're miserable, it's time to leave. Ditto if you feel that you're the only one putting effort into the relationship.
picturesque03afterthought
December 8th, 2015 2:16pm
Actually it's hard to lay down a set points to tell when it's over..it something that only you or your partner can feel. It's when you realize the things or qualities about your relationship and your partner, that once made you happy are not doing so anymore. When our flaws or differences become more prominent. When you realize you are more in love with the memories rather than the person itself. When the pile of unsaid words just keeps growing up,. When you prefer to stay silent than to talk..even if it;s just about your day, when silence becomes awkward...basically..when you start asking yourself if it's over..IT IS
Anonymous
January 17th, 2015 7:41am
When you both have lost its spark and when you both realizes that you have been disagreeing a lot and couldn't find any solutions but to just pretend that everything is fine because it is easier that way.
Anonymous
January 18th, 2016 3:49pm
if you don't feel special to that person any more, or if you think you would both be happier separated, if you don't feel that excitement like you did at the start or you don't feel like you have any feelings towards them.
Anonymous
May 27th, 2015 4:10am
There can be several different signs when you should know it is time to break up with someone. For instance, if your boyfriend or girlfriend is being violent and abusive, it is best to leave before things get worse. Also if you aren't happy than you should really ask yourself why your still in this relationship, your happiness comes first.
milomom13
January 10th, 2017 5:42pm
It is a hard thing to know when to break up with someone, sometimes there are clear cut lines- such as when they are harming themselves, harming others, or harming you. And even then it does not make it easy to break up with someone. If they are making you feel bad about yourself, or pressuring you to do something that you do not want to do or know is wrong- it is probably time to have a serious talk, and if you cannot come to a compromise, or they keep doing it when you ask them not to- then it is time to break up with them. And sometimes the lines are blurry- you still love the person, but they are not fulfilling your needs (love, support, time, attention) or you feel you cannot give them what they need. This does not mean that you or them are bad people, it just means that you have grown apart as people/lovers/friends/what have you. I have been in the same situation, where I loved my partner but we could no longer give each other what we needed. I hope this helps.
Anonymous
October 24th, 2016 3:20pm
When you feel like you've grown apart and want different things as well as when you don't feel the love or the connection you two have had before
RiaNane
November 10th, 2015 8:18am
we know its time to break up when the relationship has taken up everything that you are made of....has changed you mentally.....when one is over powering the other and making out a totally new person.... we may never know in certain cases till it is pointed out by a third party....being who you are when you are with your person is the best thing ever ...loosing that will automatically lead to problems...... peace of mind is the only thing that can help a person deal life in any situation.... in life there can never actually be a break up... things will always remain a part of your life ...your priorities change .....thats life
maryammm98
May 31st, 2015 1:46pm
You know it's time when there is no longer any passion between you and your hearts no longer beat on the same frequency. Being with them is a tiring task and their cute habits no longer amuse you.
Anonymous
May 28th, 2015 7:32am
Ending a relationship is never easy, even when you know it's the right thing to do. First, though, you have to be sure that it's the right choice by seeing if the tell-tale signs apply to you. So what are some of the signs- 1)Consider if there's something you have been reluctant to accept about your partner. 2)Think about your own issues. You may discover that you want to break up because you don't want to face certain issues in yourself, like insecurity or fear of abandonment, but they are sure to turn up in any relationship you're in. 3)See if you're only in the relationship because you don't want to hurt your partner's feelings. 4)See if you're just in the relationship because you're afraid of being alone. 5)Be willing to accept that maybe you're just not that into your partner anymore. Or, maybe they're just not all that into you.
Anonymous
May 27th, 2015 7:01am
If you feel like you don't see the future with the current partner, you don't see yourselves together as a family, you don't feel the passion, the unquestioned love for him/her, maybe it's time to let that relationship go. Don't be together just because you get used to it.
Anonymous
May 18th, 2015 2:33pm
When you feel hurt more than loved around that person.
Braesiat
April 9th, 2015 11:21pm
i would say its time to break up with someone when you are no longer happy with the relationship. This could be the result of numerous things, however if you feel like you're being treated poorly or you don't have any spark... (which would make you unhappy) i feel this is when you should terminate the relationship.
colourfulRose14
March 15th, 2015 9:50am
If you feel that you both are growing distance.. and that you just don't feel them butterflies when you see them.. its best to just call it off.
YaGirlBre
December 11th, 2017 12:10am
When you've discovered to realized that you and your partner have come to a rut in your relationship. The first step is to bring your concern to your partner. Maybe they don't know that you feel that way or they feel the same way. Now that you've addressed the issue or issues that need changing, give it some time for it to work out. If after some time things don't improve, you still feel like your relationship and you feel like you are no longer getting the most out of this relationship then it's time to end things.
Anonymous
September 5th, 2016 7:22pm
If your relationship becomes turbulent or abusive it is a time to end not mend it. If communication becomes strained it may be an issue to work out together.
JCGeorge95
September 26th, 2016 3:54am
Only you yourself know what's best for you. However, if the relationship has fallen to the point where domestic violence or abuse is an issue, please consider breaking the relationship immediately and seek medical attention and legal action.
Solia
November 14th, 2016 2:16am
Some relationships can be saved even when it doesn't seem like it. Do you want to save your relationship? Does the other person in the relationship want it to be saved? If both people are willing to fight for it, then do fight. If the answer is no, then it might be time to break up. If staying in the relationship is making you unhappy and you don't see that changing, break up. If you don't see a future together, it might be better to break up.
Elizzabeth
February 17th, 2015 6:34pm
When you start thinking things like this. If you aren't happy in a relationship, it's better to just end it than let it drag you down. Try making things exciting again if you want to, but if that fails, it's better to just break up.
svxo23
November 20th, 2017 7:44am
It's time to break up with someone when the physically or emotionally abuse you, or when you think more about the past with them than you do the future.
EagleEyes
February 8th, 2016 9:40pm
You feel like your relationship has gone dull. The fire that was lit is now cold ash. The feeling that you once had for that person are gone.
charmingShoulder
December 13th, 2017 3:11am
When you feel like it's not the same. When they don't put any effort into the relationship anymore or when they stop texting you or calling you like they used to.
Yourfriend0809
March 6th, 2018 3:05pm
When the relationship becomes a burden. When planning things with your significant other becomes a chore.
Anonymous
March 13th, 2018 3:27pm
I feel one answer to that could be when you both spend more time fighting than enjoying your time together. When the resentments are stronger than anything else.
helenzhang19
April 3rd, 2018 4:05pm
When you are upset or sad more often than you are happy and carefree with them or simply thinking about them?
Yukihiko
April 24th, 2018 6:56am
When you're very certain that your other seems always busy and ignores you a lot. Doesn't try to contact you. makes you feel alone
gigantPoetry28
August 24th, 2020 8:17pm
It's time to break up when the person no longer does the things ye used to do, they ignore you, they treat you like an ordinary, they give importance to others Rather than you, they don't care about your feelings, they get Andgry over silly things. When talkng about future with that person makes you anxious, when the person is uncertain about you and keeps secrets from you. There are so many more signs, but the most important one is the vibe that you get from this person when things start going downhill. Trust your intuition, it'll guide you always.
Anonymous
April 11th, 2022 1:13am
It is time to break up with someone when you feel like your life revolves more around them rather than yourself. You don't feel happy or empty inside when with them, they make you feel bad about yourself or anything that you do. You will feel it in your gut when things are wrong or going down the wrong path. You'll know and you just have to trust your gut and do it. Breaking up with someone isn't hard its what follows the pain in your chest but with time you will be okay. You'll figure out who you are again and maybe you'll love this version more.
HuddlesWillAlwaysListen
July 11th, 2016 12:21am
Its time to break up with someone when they're not giving effort in a relationship. If they don't give any effort that means they don't care. If they did care, they'd give effort.
heavenPeace57
January 25th, 2016 4:41pm
When you are in love with your memories more than the person who stand in front of you. That's when you know you have to walk away.