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How long does it take to get over someone?

393 Answers
Last Updated: 01/24/2023 at 3:52am
How long does it take to get over someone?
★ This question about Breakups was starred by a moderator on 5/12/2016.
1 Tip to Feel Better
United Kingdom
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Tanyia Hughes, Adv Dip Psy

Psychotherapist

I have been through a lot in life too, which helps me to be able to empathize with situations, thoughts and feelings that we have. Sometimes, it's not easy just being human.

Top Rated Answers
Skipfan5
January 21st, 2016 7:56pm
It depends on when you decide to take a stand, and act apon the situation. It could take from a week, to a few months. It's all up to you
Anonymous
January 22nd, 2016 8:28am
it depends on a person. I happened to get over with several people in my life. approximately from 3 months upwards depending on the value they added in my life.
Bblovetj
January 23rd, 2016 12:41am
It could take up to months even years but the best way too speed up the process is to do other things with friends or family that do not remind you of them. Create new memories so those memories with him/her aren't the only things on your mind.
Erin12345
January 24th, 2016 7:50am
I think it really depends. A lot of times, people make a huge impact on our lives, and it can take a long time for that to heal over.
LilithPA
January 24th, 2016 7:57pm
Scientifically speaking it tends to take about four months to get over someone. However it depends on each of us, because every person is different. Some people deal better with lost.
Anonymous
January 27th, 2016 7:48pm
It all depends on the person. It could take 6 months and it could also take a year just depending on the situation and personality of the people involved.
Eluna
January 28th, 2016 12:18pm
It really depends on how much you felt you loved them. It can range from days to weeks to years, and as long as you try hard to persevere through such times you'll be able to get over someone.
heartfulSky71
January 29th, 2016 2:33pm
It may take a long time but you got to realize that its not you. I hope you understand that they aren't worth it.
Anonymous
January 30th, 2016 1:02am
How long would you need? that's pretty much depending on how attached you were to him/her
warmsunshine23
January 31st, 2016 8:20pm
It's different for everyone. It also depend on who you're trying to get over and how you're getting over them.
justlovingtheSea
February 1st, 2016 8:06am
this depends on the type of person you are and the type of person they were. if they were toxic but you had good days with them then a few weeks but if you had a long time friend ship but they suddenly changed then maybe months or days.
Anonymous
February 3rd, 2016 2:36am
It really depends on how attatched you were to that person. But it is okay to take as much time as you need to get over someone.
Anonymous
February 3rd, 2016 6:09pm
It all really depends on you you have got to be strong and keep yourself busy stay on the right track and do don't fall prey to temptations before you know it youl be over it all the best :)
sereneCreature61
February 3rd, 2016 8:42pm
Every person is different. Putting expectations on yourself will only cause more anxiety about your place in your journey. Although if you feel that your feelings are holding you back from opportunities in your life, then would be an appropriate time to have a non-judgemental conversation about what's going on :)
caringShiny86
February 6th, 2016 3:28am
That depends but at most it should take 6 months at least trust me I know.Just as long as you avoid them as much as possible
Anonymous
February 10th, 2016 1:45pm
A long time i'm still trying to get through on something that happened over a year aago and never would have come this far without friends and a listening ear here on 7Cups.
sproutsdavidtran
February 11th, 2016 8:02pm
It depends. Getting over someone could take from days to years. All depends on you, your relationship, and everything else. I have gotten over people within 2 months, I have gotten over people within 6 months, There are some that I can get over within a week. However, it depends on how you broke up with them. Was it mutual, bad, good, me, or them? How much time invested? A lot of memories? But there's a process, that I know for sure. Always have to clean the "house" - get rid of all ties/connections to them. It just helps. Then go out, find a hobby, find something to do, to occupy the alone time. Then go talk to people, talk about anything BUT the relationship. Why bring it up? You're trying to get over it. That's as far as I know.
IsabelleB
February 27th, 2016 12:15am
It depends on how long you two were together, or knew each other. It depends on the amount of time you spent with each other, like moments. It also depends on how deep the feelings were.
Yourfairygodbro
March 17th, 2016 4:17am
I'm not sure about anyone else but it takes me anywhere from a few months to a year. The important thing is identifying your emotions and comparing their severity as time goes on. For example, you could write down how bad you feel one week and explain why and then compare that to how you feel about the person the week after. Slowly, you'll learn to be without them if you can't have them back.
ephermeral
April 5th, 2016 5:47am
There isn't a definite lenth, you try very hard and cope with it. It may take weeks or months or years, but eventually it will hurt less and you do.
Anonymous
April 25th, 2016 9:17am
Whoever long it takes. Everyone deals with things differently. So for some it may be a relatively short time while for others it takes longer
RileyTwiggs
May 30th, 2016 4:33am
This really depends on the person and the confrontation/breakup. Some people get over their ex's quickly, while others take a long time. Either way it's normal.
HopieRemi
July 5th, 2016 8:05am
There's no specific amount of time it takes to get over someone. It really depends on you and how much you were into the person. It can be quick or it can be long. In the end, it depends on you.
Anonymous
November 20th, 2017 7:11am
It really depends. My first relationship lasted a month with a guy I didn’t love, I got over it within a week. My second relationship as well as my third however took me a while because we developed real love feelings. Honestly it just depends on when you feel ready to move on with your life.
xxdeadcloudxx
January 15th, 2018 8:05pm
It all depends on how much you liked the person and how hurt you feel. Sometimes it takes months, other times it takes days.
Anonymous
April 1st, 2019 1:41pm
The more intoxicating the love, the more difficult it will be to let go of it all and move on with your life. You’re not going to want to let go because you remember how good it once was and believe it could be that good again. You still have hope that things may one day change. And you’re right. Things will surely change, but how they will change likely won’t align with the way you’re hoping things will change. But I’m just speaking from personal experience. Even when you come to accept that it is time to move on, it’s not always easy to move on. The question of “why?" keeps popping into your mind. Why did things have to end this way? I’m here to tell you it doesn’t matter why. Things ended the way they ended because that’s the way they ended. You can pick apart and learn from your mistakes, but past that, there isn’t anything else to learn from the circumstance. It’s important to understand not everything happens for a reason. I know this goes against what most of us have been taught to believe, but the reality is some things didn’t need to happen but happened nonetheless. And all we can do is learn from our mistakes and work toward a better, more fulfilling future for ourselves.
Anonymous
June 5th, 2019 11:38am
A healthy mind, can rid heartache in 5-6 months. It may take years, depending on certain circumstances. Letting go, is the best medicine. It involves a grieving process. Which in most cases, works for everyone. It involves putting the relationship to rest. Grieve, Allow emotions to flow, allow thoughts to process, write down thoughts, self reflect, practice mindfulness. Next part is the hardest, forgive them and say goodbye. Sounds easy, it’s really not. In order to actually forgive and forget. One must actually feel free of negativity. In order to let go and move on. Healthy people, leave forever and move on. Unhealthy people, make excuses to hold onto what hurt them. This behavior is unhealthy, it carries judgement, unhealthy emotions and behaviors. That is why there is no such thing as being friends with an ex. Find people who are willing to have healthy relationships alike and want to be in your life.
FreelanceC
June 22nd, 2020 8:05pm
There's no good answer here. With me, I thought i was over them inside a few weeks and then over a year later I realised I hadn't dealt with my grief at the break up at all. All I can suggest is take it as it comes. Some emotions will be hard but try to listen to them. Take time to see what you are feeling, where is it in your body, is it heavy, light, solid? Try to put a name to it - I am feeling sad and angry. Maybe even tell the story - I am feeling sad and angry because i have lost them and they meant everything to me. It does get better, sometimes little by little, sometimes by leaps and bounds, but the time will come when you can look back with peace rather than pain. And it will probably be faster than you think.
Rebekah
August 6th, 2020 10:12am
There isn't exactly a straight-lined answer for this, as it really is different for everyone. It can take weeks, months, maybe even years, though it is possible to do so. Ways in which you could try to get over an ex include moving on with another person, blocking all contact with the ex, spending time with others, and sometimes even accepting that it's over can help with getting over them. It is a really difficult and painful process, one that I have experienced a few times and it doesn't necessarily get better with experience. But, time is a healer, and giving things time can really help in the long run. Again, it can take quite some time to fully get over someone (though it does differ for everyone) - only you know how long it'll take.
Anonymous
November 24th, 2020 4:28am
Coming from personal experience, its gonna take a while hun:) I know how all consuming love can feel and when it lasts for as long as mine did, it took time for me to get over him. youre going to feel like a part of you is empty for a second, and that is okay. better to grieve what you've lost and slowly, but surely move on, instead of ignoring your feelings and them coming back to haunt you later. it took me time to get over everything I felt for him, the good and the bad, but the sooner I realized how much he meant to me and accepted that he would always be a part of my life, I was able to come to terms with everything that had happened, and now im still getting there, but im okay:)