Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav

How long does it take to get over someone?

392 Answers
Last Updated: 04/17/2021 at 9:03pm
How long does it take to get over someone?
★ This question about Breakups was starred by a moderator on 5/12/2016.
1 Tip to Feel Better
United Kingdom
Moderated by

Tanyia Hughes, Adv Dip Psy

Psychotherapist

I have been through a lot in life too, which helps me to be able to empathize with situations, thoughts and feelings that we have. Sometimes, it's not easy just being human.

Top Rated Answers
lovelyOcean15
August 6th, 2015 5:40pm
It depends, it could be few days, few months or up to few years. That's normal to be sad, heartbroken, hurtful etc. But give oneself a timeframe to move on, that would be more useful cause we are not living for the "ex" but for our own.
Anonymous
August 12th, 2015 5:29am
NOW! period. Tie/me/knot - Time me not. Time is not a owner of you! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Anonymous
September 29th, 2015 10:10am
There is no definitive answer. All people are made differently and when you break up with someone it is losing someone and there are different stages of grief. It can take a few months or a few years depending on the person.
moonchild29
February 9th, 2016 4:41pm
Took me several months to let him go, but he's still there somewhere in my mind even now. Like.. I definitely don't wish for anything anymore again, but I never stop caring. He needed only a few weeks (less?) to get over me though.
Yellowumbrella143
February 12th, 2016 8:14am
It is not a day, a month or a year long process. It depends on your willingness to get over someone. No one can help you get over it except you. People may pick up broken pieces of your heart but its you who needs to glue it back together.
StrawberryIcicle
April 19th, 2016 4:29am
The old saying is 1 month for every year you were together but it really depends on you, how you felt,what they meant to you and the reasons for splitting up. I'd suggest you chat with an active listener.
navyFig9937
May 29th, 2016 11:22pm
I'd honestly say that it's rather easy getting over the person themselves. It's the damage that sometimes a toxic relationship can leave behind that can take a great deal of time to heal from. For myself, it took about a month to get over the person but it took a long time to heal from the damage the person caused and be able to move foward in a new relationship without fear, reservations, or carrying pain from the past. I know people say in order to get over the old you replace with something new and to a degree that's true but my advice would be definitely to heal before you deal! Trust yourself, your instincts and let time heal your wounds no matter how long that takes for you. You will come out like pure gold in the end. Promise!
CatsInTheCradle
March 18th, 2017 5:44pm
There's no definitive period for "getting over" someone. Even the idea of "getting over" something is quite illusory and sets a false expectation which diminishes the real difficulty of that process, as it frames your emotional struggle as something you should just forget about. Rather than "getting over" something, try and "get through" something instead, which includes a process of working through your emotional issues in order to secure some kind of emotional /psychological closure that is directed at understanding why the relationship ended / was not working out. The ultimate goal is to reach a state of "acceptance" as opposed to "just forgetting about it all". How long this process takes can depend on : 1) the depth of emotional investment you had in that person 2) how proactively you work on moving on from those emotions 3) whether you have a positive & supportive network and resources to guide you towards a better place
Thomas8
September 30th, 2014 5:44am
That is all based on your feelings and mindset. Mainly how big of an impact that person was in your life
Anotherteenagertolisten
October 20th, 2014 7:01pm
It depends on the person and ultimately the relationship. How long you knew the person, if you were friends beforehand. If it was your first relationship or not.
ellahsecret
October 24th, 2014 7:12pm
There is no special time limit. The time it takes to get over someone varies. Some take longer and others not so long. It's up to you
Anonymous
April 16th, 2015 10:16pm
7 years. After that it wont be so bad anymore. Tho if you see the person offten it takes longer.
AloneAcneLove
June 24th, 2015 8:51am
There's no specific answer to this. Everyone is different. But to get over someone in a way you want it to be, is to find Distraction and FOCUS. This is important if you really want to get over someone.
AutumnSunset23
June 24th, 2015 8:12pm
It varies. Everyone is different. It also depends if this was your first relationship, or how long the relationship was. The more intense the relationship, the longer it will take to get over. Generally a healthy goal to shoot for is to be able to move on within 6 months, maybe a little less or more. Anymore than a year and you should talk to a professional. IT also depends though if you are married and had children with the person- it may difficult to "get over them" when they are still apart of your life.
AngleTYBarakatx
June 26th, 2015 3:41am
getting over someone could take forever depending on what you felt towards that certain person and how much you cared
BrandonTheListener
June 28th, 2015 2:01am
Honestly? As long as you need. Getting over someone is rough, but time heals all wounds. Eventually you will move on, because you are strong enough to overcome this.
Ifeelthesameway
July 2nd, 2015 9:10am
Getting over someone takes time, especially if the feelings of attachment towards that person is strong.
sweetSun27
July 2nd, 2015 10:56pm
I believe it varies because everyone is different. For instance, it took me a year to get over an ex because of the emotional pain he had caused me.
FavoritePillow27
July 3rd, 2015 3:00am
There's definitely no timetable in getting over a failed relationship. I believe it's about grieving the loss, (in a healthy way) but not allowing it to overtake you. Reflecting upon the relationship, whether it was healthy or not, what was learned while in the relationship, what good will come from it ending, are things that will take time, but eventually, will become evident. Getting ones heart broken is part of life. That isn't any comfort to someone going through the pain of a failed relationship, but as we grow older we know that's true. This is always a time when good friends come in handy.
Anonymous
July 9th, 2015 1:05pm
Depends on how attached you were to them and how well you are trying to get over that person. For me since I did things I love and reminded myself how my partner helped me, went out and so it only took 1-2 weeks.
Dovah
July 15th, 2015 7:12pm
That varies, for sure! It can depend on how close you were, how big a part of your life they were, and so on. It'll vary because your experience is unique, typically however, the closer you've become with an individual, usually the harder and longer it takes to get over losing them.
ElliotAlexander
July 15th, 2015 9:26pm
Everyone is different with this. It's taken me 7 months. Some can get over someone in the matter of days or a few weeks.
Some12Lava
July 19th, 2015 6:33pm
It takes as long as it takes you to fall for someone else. Even then sometimes it still takes a bit.
MelodyMila
July 22nd, 2015 7:54pm
Till you believe it's time for you to move on (until then you can never really move on . even if it's years and you're holding on . You must let it go , find a new dream and hope for the best)
sunbeams
July 31st, 2015 2:18pm
It actually depends on how much the person made an impact on you and it honestly takes time to get over someone especially the feelings you had for that person and the memories you made together.
classicangel
August 2nd, 2015 4:02pm
It can take months, years, days, seconds. It really depends on the individual. People might be like "If yous dated for long then it'll take a long time" Yes that can be true but it can also be a lie. Some people can date for 4 years and get over someone in weeks. The best way to get over someone quick is to stop stalking their social media and tracking every step they take.
brightBubbles24
August 5th, 2015 11:07pm
When you're in love you love everything about that person, how they look, talk, what they do.. But when it comes to end you feel empty. Will you get over that person fast or slow depends on how much you cared about it. Sometimes it takes long time to feel fully recovered and healed, but on the other side you should keep trying to make yourself feel better by remembering yourself that life is too short to be in pain all the time.
Anonymous
August 6th, 2015 2:02pm
One crazy thing about getting over someone is that it cannot be measured by time. It varies. It is like one day you'll wake up and realize you no longer love that person.
Llwyn7
August 8th, 2015 9:01pm
In my experience, the amount of time it takes to get over someone is entirely dependent on you and the nature of your relationship with that person. It could take days, weeks, months, sometimes years if the relationship was long enough or meant enough to you.
Gat89
August 9th, 2015 2:46pm
Had it been mathematics, I would love to come up with a number. Alas, it isnt. 'Getting over someone' involves going through the pain of separation, recognizing the realities of the situation, understanding the personal responses to the phenomenon of the relationship and making peace with it all. How everyone tackles these (assuming your relationship was, at the least, somewhat serious), varies from person to person. I took close to a year to move on after a 5 year long relationship. I hope you find your peace. It may be difficult, but far from impossible.