How long does it take to get over someone?
393 Answers
Last Updated: 01/24/2023 at 3:52am
★ This question about Breakups was starred by a moderator on 5/12/2016.
Moderated by
Tanyia Hughes, Adv Dip Psy
Psychotherapist
I have been through a lot in life too, which helps me to be able to empathize with situations, thoughts and feelings that we have. Sometimes, it's not easy just being human.
Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
November 20th, 2014 6:26pm
Depends on the person, really.......................................................................
It is not a day, a month or a year long process. It depends on your willingness to get over someone. No one can help you get over it except you. People may pick up broken pieces of your heart but its you who needs to glue it back together.
Anonymous
September 29th, 2015 10:10am
There is no definitive answer. All people are made differently and when you break up with someone it is losing someone and there are different stages of grief. It can take a few months or a few years depending on the person.
The answer for this is dependent on you...how much good you can squeeze out from a particular situation and how much grateful you can be, for a situation, shall indirectly lead you to your solution..
Took me several months to let him go, but he's still there somewhere in my mind even now. Like.. I definitely don't wish for anything anymore again, but I never stop caring. He needed only a few weeks (less?) to get over me though.
Truthfully I feel you never truly "get over" someone you once loved because when you truly love someone you give them apiece of your heart. When a piece of your heart is given one never gets it back, the person who gave the piece quite truthfully will never be whole again. Sometimes we can go from relationship to relationship wanting what we had before. Wanting that single piece of our heart back in our possession once again. I think when a person "gets over" an ex we are simply coming to the understanding that we will never feel that Same love again.
Everyone is different, and for some it may time more time than others. It depends on how serious the realtionship may have been and how much you cared for the person. Nevertheless, if you have an open heart and mind, and allow yourself to move on, it'll only a matter of time.
It depends, it could be few days, few months or up to few years. That's normal to be sad, heartbroken, hurtful etc. But give oneself a timeframe to move on, that would be more useful cause we are not living for the "ex" but for our own.
Anonymous
August 6th, 2015 2:02pm
One crazy thing about getting over someone is that it cannot be measured by time. It varies. It is like one day you'll wake up and realize you no longer love that person.
Everyone is different with this. It's taken me 7 months. Some can get over someone in the matter of days or a few weeks.
That varies, for sure! It can depend on how close you were, how big a part of your life they were, and so on. It'll vary because your experience is unique, typically however, the closer you've become with an individual, usually the harder and longer it takes to get over losing them.
There is no special time limit. The time it takes to get over someone varies. Some take longer and others not so long. It's up to you
Anonymous
January 8th, 2016 4:54pm
It took me one year to get over a break-up when I loved the guy.It was a two years relationship and he never once said 'I love you' during that time.
It takes as long as it takes you to fall for someone else. Even then sometimes it still takes a bit.
Well personally even after a 1 1/2 month relationship with the first girl i felt i ever loved its taken me 6 months and even then i had to stop doing stuff so i didnt see her
Anonymous
August 16th, 2015 8:00am
It depends on how much that person really meant to you and how much you really loved them.
It depends on the person and ultimately the relationship. How long you knew the person, if you were friends beforehand. If it was your first relationship or not.
Till you believe it's time for you to move on (until then you can never really move on . even if it's years and you're holding on . You must let it go , find a new dream and hope for the best)
Had it been mathematics, I would love to come up with a number.
Alas, it isnt.
'Getting over someone' involves going through the pain of separation, recognizing the realities of the situation, understanding the personal responses to the phenomenon of the relationship and making peace with it all.
How everyone tackles these (assuming your relationship was, at the least, somewhat serious), varies from person to person. I took close to a year to move on after a 5 year long relationship.
I hope you find your peace. It may be difficult, but far from impossible.
In my experience, the amount of time it takes to get over someone is entirely dependent on you and the nature of your relationship with that person. It could take days, weeks, months, sometimes years if the relationship was long enough or meant enough to you.
You never really "get over" someone. Feelings don't go away, they evolve. So move along and don't let those feeling get the best of you.
Anonymous
July 9th, 2015 1:05pm
Depends on how attached you were to them and how well you are trying to get over that person. For me since I did things I love and reminded myself how my partner helped me, went out and so it only took 1-2 weeks.
Getting over someone is different for everyone, there is no set time frame. Try to focus on yourself and become the best version of yourself you can possibly be and you will soon see how strong a person you are and that you truly deserve the best in this world.
There's no specific answer to this. Everyone is different. But to get over someone in a way you want it to be, is to find Distraction and FOCUS. This is important if you really want to get over someone.
It certainly depends on the individual. Usually, these things are supposed to take time. But i have seen many, including my friends move on very quickly.
In my case it has been almost 3 years now and I am still struggling and fighting to move on. It is probably one of the reasons for which I am diagnosed with Depression. But still, the intensity of these struggling will get lower as the time passes by. But at the same time it can also be the other way around also.
The mistakes I had done were sticking to the same plans and dreams me and my ex had set in the past while she has moved on. It is always better to have someone to vent about all these and slowly setting new plans and focus areas. It is difficult though. But it is necessary to remember that there is no easy way also. And do not try these so called shortcut ways like moving into another relationship and all real quickly thinking it would help because most times it ends up in another hear break.
These situations can be used favourably also, like to identify the flaws and faults in us or to improve spiritually. And after all realising that they have the freedom to leave you is also important. Letting them go as they wish is the best thing to do for us and them.
And silly things like burning or dumping all the monuments can also be helpful. The fact is it is o painful so I had kept all that all these years but a few days ago may sister pushed me to do all that and helped me with it also. It can be disturbing for sometime but slowly it cools our mind.
The difficult thing will be for those who were so dependent on their ex, like in my case. All I can say to you is find a good listener/friend here in 7 cups to help you with.
And all the best everyone. You are not alone.
Anonymous
January 3rd, 2016 2:57pm
Honestly, sometimes never. Sometimes you can never get over someone despite how hard you try. Love/relationships are complicated.
Anonymous
April 16th, 2015 10:16pm
7 years. After that it wont be so bad anymore. Tho if you see the person offten it takes longer.
It varies. Everyone is different. It also depends if this was your first relationship, or how long the relationship was. The more intense the relationship, the longer it will take to get over. Generally a healthy goal to shoot for is to be able to move on within 6 months, maybe a little less or more. Anymore than a year and you should talk to a professional. IT also depends though if you are married and had children with the person- it may difficult to "get over them" when they are still apart of your life.
To be really honest, you cannot stop loving someone even though it is in the past or it is unrequited. If it is just lust, staying away will help. If you love the other person truly, then that love will never fade. Just accept that she/he doesn’t want you in her/his life anymore and stay away from that person. May be time and distance will help both of you to realize what you both mean to each other. Till then stay away, otherwise you will be hurt so much. Time doesn’t heal anything. It just teaches you to live with that pain. True love will never go away and you cannot forget that person. But remember that if things are to happen, they will realize someday. I am still crying as I write this one, because I know how much it hurts to be ignored by the one who means a lot to me. Save yourself from that pain.
Sometimes we don't get closure all the time and it is not required either. We just have to learn to live with that pain.
Anonymous
February 11th, 2016 8:55am
It depends. Some take months, some take years. It's just a matter of accepting things you cannot change.
Related Questions: How long does it take to get over someone?
How to get over someone you have to see everyday?My long-term boyfriend told me that my mental health has affected him and he just wants to be friends as though nothing more ever happened. This really hurts me. What should I do?Can or should I ask my significant other to stop talking and to not associate with his ex? If so, how? How do I know if I'm in a toxic relationship?Why are we fighting over small and stupid things?What to do when you feel you are not good enough for someone?He said I was perfect for him, but he chose someone else?I regret breaking up with my ex. What should I do?How to get closure from my ex? I feel I need it.I love two different people. What should I do?