Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav

I can't get over my ex boyfriend. What should I do?

88 Answers
Last Updated: 12/14/2020 at 8:37pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United Kingdom
Moderated by

Graham Barrone, Adip ICHP, MCBT

Counselor

If you've found that your quality of life has reduced because of anxiety, fear or some kind of mental hurdle that you just can't get over then lets chat.

Top Rated Answers
caringReeds28
March 17th, 2016 10:41am
That varies from person to person. Common choice are - channeling your energy into your hubbies like painting etc; taking up a new class; spending more time with your friends; travelling solo; working on yourself; pampering yourself; hitting the gym; dating someone new; doing some volunteer work; blowing off some steam; seeing a specialist if it gets too much to bear
RoseTyler2102
March 18th, 2016 12:17am
You need to stop every comunnication with him or with anyone who reminds you of him... Throw every stuff that he gave you or that remind you of him. BREAK EVERY CONECTION WITH HIM
Skygivesyoulight
March 20th, 2016 5:18am
Do stuff to keep yourself occupied to not think about him. Tell yourself you deserve better and sooner or later you'll get over him. Takes time. All about timing and keeping yourself happy.
incarnadinepetals
March 23rd, 2016 1:15am
You should distract yourself through things that you enjoy doing. Like going out with your friends, doing yoga, going to the gym, writing, reading, all of that stuff.
SoialWorkerAllan
March 24th, 2016 2:26am
Depending on how you two broke up. If it was a healthy relationship talk to your ex. If it was abusive talk to a friend or a professional counsellor and find ways to move on
zaix
March 25th, 2016 12:59am
Move on, if it didn't work then you need to try to find something that makes you happy and do that and be you, do you and do what you need.
Anonymous
March 26th, 2016 6:40am
I can't get over my ex bf as well at first, but then I thought of all the ways he used to treat me, the goods and the bad. I revisited the places we used to be one last time, and everywhere I went, I left the memories that we had at the place.
rainbug
March 26th, 2016 11:16am
Comfort yourself, treat yourself, in this moment you are fragile, protect your heart. Get a good night's sleep, cry all the tears you need to, watch a movie, call a friend, breathe and tell yourself it will be okay, I swear it will be.
lovingEmbrace40
April 7th, 2016 10:34pm
Mourning is okay and natural. You felt deeply connected to someone. What I would do now is, focus on me. I would take some of that love you had for another and treat myself to it.
Anonymous
April 16th, 2016 9:05am
Learn to love yourself and invest time in doing things for you only, like fill your time with productive things: doing sports, going to workshops... and you will forget about him :)
NormaBates666
April 17th, 2016 8:02pm
I know its hard, ive had break ups as well. What you should do is keep going about your daily routines and activities. Do things you enjoy, even if right now you cant find much joy. Mourn the loss but realize you are going to be ok. Your life is full of promise.
Anonymous
April 21st, 2016 5:12pm
Find something to take your mind off of things for a while keep itself busy ... Or find someone new to take ur mind off of the old
bajanoblast
April 23rd, 2016 7:41pm
Try and get your mind off of him. Hang out with friends, bond with family, or even do something for yourself! Get a haircut, change your hair color even. Do something that's going to make you feel better and relax you. I like to paint and play the piano when I need comfort.
JK8287
April 24th, 2016 4:07pm
There's a new age process called cord-cutting that helps to sever emotional ties between people, that can be helpful.
dyingpoet
April 29th, 2016 4:03pm
Talk about it with friends, and try not to focus on it. Find healthy coping mechanisms in your life that work for you.
proudHand38
April 29th, 2016 5:58pm
You should hang out with friends, lose yourself in an activity, ... Anything that could take your mind of of him, because thinking about something often will only make you think about it more, until you start to ruminate. If this is too hard, or is working in reverse, another way is to grant yourself half an hour of thoroughly thinking about him (per day/per 12hours/...) After those 30min., you prohibit yourself of thinking about him for the rest of the time.
Anonymous
April 30th, 2016 10:00am
Try by distracting yourself to the things you like and block him from all other social apps or contacts.
FrostySmiles39
May 5th, 2016 7:52pm
What you should do is like read book that are funny and are not about love so that it will help you get him out of your head.
Angi3
May 7th, 2016 6:15am
Try going out more, maybe you just haven't found another person that you like as much yet. I can't help you much, since this hasn't happened to me. :)
Edenine
May 8th, 2016 7:45am
Take your time, do things you love. Connect with other people who will support you and help you get through it, know that it's normal to miss people who are no longer in your life. Talk to someone about it, talk to your ex about it if it's necessary. Don't blame yourself for whatever happened in the past, and maybe love yourself before you love others.
Anonymous
May 8th, 2016 10:11pm
Everything takes time, especially heartbreak. Cry, express yourself and hold nothing in. Staying physically active is also a very important part of recovering.
JohanDwanian
May 9th, 2016 8:46pm
Focus on yourself and your own life. Spend time and energy on improving yourself and focus on things that you like to do or experience. Work on being happy with yourself and where you are. Take steps to reach that point. Most importantly give it time, because letting go does take time. Allow yourself to let go even if it is painful. It will pass. With time it will be easier to handle. Also remember it doesn't mean you have to stop loving someone. As long as you can move forward and also be open for new people and experiences. Connect with others that you can relate with in a positive sense.
MoonChild17
May 9th, 2016 10:02pm
You can try to focus on yourself a bit , to start telling yourself over and over that your ex was just something from the past and not it's gone , That you don't even need anyone who doesn't want you around , Try to care for yourself more and the people you really love and those who care about you , you will get distracted by your own awesomeness and you will forget about him and you are going to find someone who really value your beauty.
Anonymous
July 11th, 2016 7:28pm
if you cant get over your ex, you need to start making yourself busy at all time, try hide all the conversations you guys have so you are not attempted to reread. hide all the pictures and you cant know the code, so you wont keeping looking back at the pictures when you guys were together. try to make a list of things you hate about him and keep reading it everyday. you might get over him slowly but its a progress and it might help
Anonymous
May 15th, 2017 3:24pm
If you want to heal from apast relationship, it might be wise to take some personal time to reflect on the relationship . Allow yourself to feel like joy and pain and anything else associated with that time. This may allow you to have a sense of closure. Hopefully that helps!
Anonymous
July 24th, 2018 12:47am
Focus on something productive, try new things. Use this time of being single to meet new people, bond with family and friends and improve yourself! You don’t need a man to make you happy!
Anonymous
June 25th, 2019 9:57pm
Meeting new people can help, more than we think. because that make us see things clearer. why should we accept the fact that we can not be with them (our exes) anymore? because some other people worth to get over these feelings, they can show us everything is easier when there is someone to walk with during this ordeal. With addition to that it will keep us busy and away from our sad feelings. of course there could be more solutions to get over an ex. Everyone has their own way of overcoming difficulties. Also, We should always ask for help from people we trust and people who seem like they care enough to listen.
alinwonderland11
December 14th, 2020 8:37pm
First good thing to do is distance yourself from him (do not communicate, do not check on his social media, do not look at photos of him, dispose of things that remind you of him). And most important: focus on yourself and your life. Look for things that make you happy and help you enjoy life, spend time with friends and new people, enjoy your hobbies (or find a new one), take care of yourself (your body and soul - both is important). Then is good to set yourself some goals and go for it. And the last thing: Be yourself and grow!