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I can't stop thinking about him or her. What should I do?

109 Answers
Last Updated: 06/29/2020 at 11:57pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Polly Letsch, LCSW

Clinical Social Work/Therapist

I provide non-judgmental, person-centered, objective therapeutic treatment for individuals of all ages to improve social, emotional, mental and other areas of functioning.

Top Rated Answers
Tiffanybuffa94
February 18th, 2016 12:45pm
Well you should try and think of something else occupy your Time with other things like just think of the things you like to do and do those things
sweets22
February 18th, 2016 1:19pm
if she/he corresponds let her/him know, chances are they are feeling the same way, if not at least you opened up.
freshoasis99
February 19th, 2016 12:12am
Attempt to find passions, try new experiences or meet new people, try and create a life which you find happy without the input of him/her, that way you can begin to realise the time you are wasting thinking about an unnecessary thought.
Anonymous
February 26th, 2016 5:38pm
Don't stop if you don't want to. Anyone's mind is allowed to think of anything. Unless you want to forget him/her. Do your nails, watch hair tutorials, exercise, go out with friends. Be around people who give you good vibes.
Manifestation
February 26th, 2016 8:48pm
Start filling your life with new meaning. Exercise is a great means to do this. As are new hobbies and discovering new interests.
HereForYou1992
February 28th, 2016 3:36pm
This could be a good time to have a think about what you really want for your future and make some plans to achive your dreams. Do you have a hobby? Try engaging in some art, pick up an instrument, plan a hike, a bike ride or a skate. Sign up to a sport or try out martial arts!
LadyCee
March 6th, 2016 2:33pm
If he or her is a crush, embrace the feeling. Talk to him or her, get closer to him or her. You never know, he or she probably likes you too & can't stop thinking about you too. But the point is you will never know if you don't try :-)
magnanimousEyes39
March 6th, 2016 8:20pm
thinking about him or her can be very distracting But doing your best to focus on yourself mental health good life style And staying active and productive can Help you
zaix
March 13th, 2016 3:09pm
You should find a way to keep your mind off of it. Go out and have fun. Do somewhat that makes you happy or something that calms you down. Meditate, do some yoga or something relaxing.
Anonymous
March 24th, 2016 5:44pm
You should try to move on by talking to someone else that would like to talk to you and not hurt you like that old person did.
glow
March 31st, 2016 11:27pm
Talk to them. Find out if they do the same about you. Even if they dont, atleast you wont regret not giving it a chance in a hope that it might work for both of you. Say it before its too late. But only say it when youre sure you want to
Sara1506
April 1st, 2016 11:25pm
Do something that makes you happy to get your mind off of them, Take up a hobby or go further with one you already have, start something you've always wanted to do, get a pet. Soon you will be too busy being amazingly happy to think about them
Anonymous
April 6th, 2016 1:43am
If the thought of him or her is putting yourself down you need to realise that its time for you to be happy again. Understand that you can either be locked in the past dwelling on what you could have been or move on a focus on what they have taught you.
chaddy0101
April 7th, 2016 1:48pm
In all Honesty in my opinion the best thing you can do is going and talking to the person in question. Tell them what you are thinking and feeling, they may feel the same way but I am sure if they are a good friend and someone you have known for a while they will appreciate your honesty. If it is a bit more difficult, maybe you keep thinking about someone who has hurt you in someway then talk it out with someone else. Never feel pressured to do so, take your time and say things carefully and with a clear mind. A motto a like to live by is: "What's the worst that can happen?"
lowkeyfye9
April 16th, 2016 11:56am
try and do something else like watching a movie, reading a book, or going for a walk. do something that will help you get your mind off them.
rightclick
April 23rd, 2016 11:21am
Keep yourself busy all time. Get yourself so much tired by being busy here n there that as soon as you hit the bed you sleep and have no thoughts of him or her
Anonymous
April 25th, 2016 9:21am
Take a walk, start a conversation with a friend. Go to social events to occupy your mind. Just do something and don't allow yourself much time to think
FindYourFree
April 27th, 2016 8:23am
Take a deep breath and understand that the heart lets go of things long after we think we're over it. It is a long process and if the relationship was very dear to you then it will become much harder to finally let go. But most importantly, realise that everything takes time and sometimes we won't get things right just by telling ourselves to not do something. (Like thinking of him/her)
Luckyhottubsandwhiches
April 27th, 2016 8:42am
Based off personal experience, the only way to stop the thinking is to tell them how you feel. Don't think of the negatives or the positives about telling them just make it your one priority to bring it up as: I can't get my mind off of you... (Then if you want, add the way you feel)
Anonymous
April 27th, 2016 4:29pm
Always follow your heart in terms of love. Of course, it depends what the situation is, but listen to what your heart tells you. Intuition says a lot about it too.
Anonymous
April 28th, 2016 5:51pm
Learn to accept it. Everywhere heart broken or made changes us a little. Embrace the good memories. Accept the mistakes that had been made. Evolve yourself. Make something special for you today Cause its not the end of the world andyou deserve better. :)
Anonymous
May 4th, 2016 1:38pm
Get out with friends, go out to the mall, listen to music, draw, write, talk to friends, hangout with your family. do stuff that'll take your mind off of him or her. and if that stuff doesn't help then take a nap go for a walk a run play outside
Blueevil91
May 6th, 2016 4:29pm
Think about which moment you stop thinking about him/her. Then exploit those moments. But that's only temporary solution. If your can't stop then confess your feeling (again) then you have to stop if it doesn't work.
LemonToLemonade
May 11th, 2016 7:59pm
Write down all your thoughts about that person, otherwise you'll keep thinking about the same stuff. Try to be busy with other activities as much as you can, even when you don't feel like it.
Anonymous
May 13th, 2016 12:43am
You should tell him or her that you are doing this. If you have feelings for that person, feel free to mention that as well. If that person has a crush, you should just drop signals that you have feelings for this person and hope for the better.
usefulPower63
May 13th, 2016 11:20am
You can make yourself busy in other things which you like the most or spend time with friends and family. Doing things which you like can help you diverting your mind
Anonymous
May 15th, 2016 4:25am
Organize your ideas and think "is he/she really worth it?" then think if she/him could make you really happy. Talk to that person about how you feel, maybe that person feels the same about you.
Anonymous
May 15th, 2016 4:21pm
Try to do something that makes you think more positively and listen to some music. Relax or go to bed and sleep.
soulmate88
May 19th, 2016 1:59pm
Yeah...it would be surely hard to avoid the thought of 'that' person...but we must understand that human mind is crazy....if we say NO to a thought it will surely come and occupy our mind entirely.....so whenever we want to avoid the thought of a person the single solution is - ALLOW THE THOUGHT....and carefully and serenly observe it.....as time passes the thought will slowly subside.....dears.....it is based on my experience. ...you can boldly try it....all the best!!!!
verboseIcarus42
May 19th, 2016 9:44pm
Use a 7 Cups calming program to help settle your nerves. Then, when you feel it's best, approach them about your feelings.