I can't stop thinking about my crush. What should I do?
Last Updated: 07/05/2020 at 5:45pm
Jennifer Patterson, LMFT, ATR-BC
Life can be messy. Sometimes you need a little support to make your way through it. I love to help guide people through their challenges & to find the beauty in our messes.
Top Rated Answers
So it seems like you have taken a special liking to a person, How long has this been going on for you?
Having a crush is a beautiful yet suffocating feeling. Those butterflies in your chest keep fluttering every time you see your crush pass by, making it hard for you to concentrate even on simple things like walking in a straight line. There is no best way to distract your brain from daydreaming about them all day long. A suggestion would be to think about a song that acknowledges the reason behind those romantic feelings. Alternatively, talking to a family member about your emotions might work. Perhaps, distracting yourself by taking up a new hobby would be a good fit for you.
Don't push yourself to stop thinking about them - that's resistance. Whenever you tell yourself, "Don't think about this," it just drives your mind to dwell on it more. If you're on good terms with your crush, look forward to the next time you'll interact with them and go on about your day like normal. It's important to still engage in things that you enjoy doing - whether that's learning, reading books, writing, games, etc. Think of what you did for enjoyment before your feelings for this person became so intense. If you're not speaking to your crush because you don't know each other well, think about a way to break the ice. Remember that if you don't know the person well, then you may be attracted to an image you have in your mind of what they're like - and it may or may not be true. You may be attracted to someone's looks, but when you get to know them, they have a rude personality or aren't much fun to be around. If you realize they aren't what you imagined, that's OK! Better to break the illusion than hold on to it while your feelings build based on a false perception. If your crush turns out to be disappointing, then it makes it a bit easier to move on. If you aren't on good terms with your crush because you were rejected, ask yourself if it's possible for you to simply be happy being their friend if that's an option. Sometimes people are afraid to get involved romantically and ruin the friendship; this could be why the other person turned you down. If they rejected you because you somehow aren't good enough for them and you can't be friends, remember that everyone gets rejected at some point. Maybe you took a chance, and that's very brave! The sting of rejection does not easily go away upon thinking these thoughts, but with time and practice, you can minimize the intensity of the emotion. Always remember that you have a life and interests besides this person. Your life is your life. And you never know when someone else may be crushing on you, too.
No matter how much I think about him he's just my crush.I can't have feelings for someone just because I think about him a lot
Talk to them, tell them how you feel. I know it's scary, but now a days, in this lifetime, you dont know how much time you will have to tell them, dont waste it. Take a chance.
If your crush is that prominent in your mind, do something about it! Your emotions are important. Tell them. If they respond positively, you'll be very happy that you did. If they respond negatively, then your heart may be broken for a bit, but you'll heal and eventually you'll be okay. No matter what, everything will turn out okay.
So I like this guy and he likes me but he friend zoned me cause he wasn’t ready but then one night he sent me some inappropriate photos and now I don’t know what to do? He’s gone away for three weeks with no phone and no way of communicating and it’s only been a week and I’m missing him more than I thought
I personally would come out and tell them exactly how you feel. Whats the worse that could happen, you get rejected? Fair enough, but you aren't with him/her now anyway so what do you have to lose? Be straight up and honest, tell them how you feel without the hesitation, if they dont feel the same thats fine you haven't got nothing to lose anyway, if they feel the same back thats an absolute bonus! Life is way too short to be worried about what people think, smile and be honest:-)
It's not bad to think about one's crush. I personally rather term it healthy. But to a certain limit. The thought should not hamper your oath works or it should not become your obsession. Think about crush. But have a control on it. To have a control go out and have pro around and mostly train your mind that way. It's May be a little difficult but not impossible. And within your range of capacity.
Tell your crush how you feel. Pull him/her aside and let them know all your feelings towards them. You would be surprised how great that can feel regardless if they return your feelings or not. Best case scenario is they feel the same way and you get the kind of relationship you have been longing for. You get to live out your dreams rather than being stuck day dreaming. Worse case scenario is they do not feel the same way towards you. It will obviously hurt to be rejected even if they say they still want to be friends. However, you also will know how they feel towards you. You can stop dwelling on what could happen between the two of you. You won't be spending so much time thinking about your crush which will leave room for other things. It will decrease your anxiety and you can move onto someone else who will be better for you. I know it can be scary to confess your feelings to the person you have a crush on. It is scary for everyone but you might be surprised how understanding your crush will be. Good luck!
Express to you crush how you feel. Express your emotions. You'll get that burden off your chest and definitely feel better.
Disconnect from your crush and let your emotions settle down before coming back to face the person that you have a crush with. It is one of those moments where people are most emotional and will do decisions based on such emotions. The goal is to help myself to have an optimal emotion that allows me to make decisions about what makes me like my crush rather than act out of passion.
Try getting to know them and talking to them. When talking, try not to play up to their hobbies, it's good to have common interests but you also shouldn't lie about what you like.
I understand that you cannot stop thinking about your crush. How does this make you feel? Why do you think you feel this way about this person?
You should tell them. Either way is a win-win situation because if they feel the same way, then good, but if they don't then you will know whether or not it's worth thinking about.
Do not treat it like it is a huge thing. Just take a deep breath and relax. Lots of couples were crushes once, so don't be afraid to reach for the person, you will find more of them, you may like them more, discover things that you do not like, your views on this person will change and so will their views on you. They'll get to know you better, what you think and envision, your experiences in life, silly little things that will draw the both of you closer for good and for bad. Taking the first step is always difficult but you have done it many times in life with lots of other things and this will be just one more. As I said the first step is difficult but you will always get a reward. Much Love, Emily
Talk to them, it never hurts to spark up a conversation. If they don't respond at all and/or the way you'd like... I promise you there's many others.
I recommend talking to him/her. This way, she/he is not a crush anymore. You'll now be thinking about your fiancee.... :/
First of all interact with her. Then go on and tell her about your feelings. That will make things going and help you as well.
There are a few things that you could do. You could tell them how you feel and be perfectly honest with them, or you can wait for them to approach you. I suggest the first one.
you're supposed to think about them, sometimes it's impossible to get them out of your head but what yo can do is try thinking abiut something which you envy more than them.
If possible you can always take action and try and ask them out, get to know them, befriend them.. this will transition your feelings from infatuation to substantial attraction.
Try to distract yourself every time you think about them! Do art! Watch TV! Do something that keeps your mind off of them.
Make a list with all the things you dislike about him. Then read them all. After that, make a list with all the things you really want in a person you would date. Then read them. Finally, compare both list and you will realise that you just love your crush temporary. You will find someone better :)
If this is something that is very distracting and you want it to stop, you can try distancing yourself from them. It will be hard at first but have to try. Delete texts or anything you may have of them on your phone. Remove the person from all social media.you could also ask you friends to not talk about the person around you.
It is good to talk to your crush if you haven't and if you want to stop thinking about him, try distracting yourself with friends by going out.
Do you know what is regret? Sometimes the worst thing is life is just simply not saying anything and let that chance pass. That nothing instead of something is done. If you like your crush, confess to her. If she likes you back, thats perfect. If she doesn't like you, then theres always other people out there for you.
Keep yourself busy. Do whatever makes you happy that doesn't involve him. Talk to friends. Get a happy crush (Like Channing Tatum then make a shrine for Channing Tatum. Lol. I kid)
Go talk to your crush! You got to start somewhere right? :D Don't be afraid to make the first move, who knows! After that first move you'll be closer then ever with your crush ;D
Either tell your crush about your feelings or just go with the flow.But telling your crush that you have feelings for them will help you decide something sane.
Related Questions: I can't stop thinking about my crush. What should I do?
How to get over someone you have to see everyday?My long-term boyfriend told me that my mental health has affected him and he just wants to be friends as though nothing more ever happened. This really hurts me. What should I do?Can or should I ask my significant other to stop talking and to not associate with his ex? If so, how? How do I know if I'm in a toxic relationship?Why are we fighting over small and stupid things?What to do when you feel you are not good enough for someone?He said I was perfect for him, but he chose someone else?I regret breaking up with my ex. What should I do?How to get closure from my ex? I feel I need it.I love two different people. What should I do?