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I can't stop thinking about my ex. What should I do?

86 Answers
Last Updated: 06/26/2018 at 2:35am
I can't stop thinking about my ex. What should I do?
1 Tip to Feel Better
Greece
Moderated by

Maria Wasielewski, Master of Arts in Counseling, University of Arizona

Licensed Professional Counselor

I am inspired when working with clients, who are facing challenging life experiences, to be able to help them to develop the needed skills to live their best possible life!

Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
March 13th, 2016 9:22pm
Try to distract yourself. Listen to music that will not make you think of them, happy songs, go on a run, read a book, play a game, hang out with friends. With time will come forgetting them.
Anonymous
March 18th, 2016 5:00am
You should do something that takes your mind off of it. For example, something you enjoy doing. I enjoy being with my friends and having as much fun as we can. Time heals the heart, you just have to move forward.
Anonymous
March 18th, 2016 9:00am
What you resist persists on the level of mind. Let the unwelcome thoughts in, have a coffee with them, and you'll find that they leave you quicker. Cord-cutting (a new age process) can also help.
TheListenerX
March 19th, 2016 2:59am
Keep busy. Keep busy. Keep busy. Thats what got me through my breakup after 5 years. If you dont keep busy your mind is going to wander back to your ex.
BeingCheerful
March 19th, 2016 11:10am
Better think about yourself then! Once you start thinking about you, Your mind will eventually stop thinking about your ex. Better Move on and let the other person too. Just be Happy :)
Anonymous
March 20th, 2016 8:30am
From my experience, it's going to keep nagging you in the back of your mind, but keep focusing on moving on. Realize that time doesn't wait for anyone and overcome the thoughts your been thinking.
Anonymous
March 20th, 2016 6:02pm
you should do something that makes you happy that ALSO makes you forget about your ex. For example: Go for a bike ride, hang out with friends, go to the movies, tell yourself that he wasn't worth your time and you deserve so much better :)
Anonymous
March 20th, 2016 8:46pm
Think about yourself first and your with . It's ok to have flashbacks of every now and again . But your ex is your ex for a reason
MeanBuster
March 24th, 2016 9:53am
It is very natural to think about your ex. In the situation of leaving because the couple didn't connect, it is ever so incremental. In situations where you were abused, you will find it more bashful than the previous stated situation. In situations where you were ignored, longing for someone is a repetitive action you were doing so it's in the norm. If you fill your time with other things, thinking about your ex is not a problem. First, try with friends. Second, with the internet, Thirdly, you can play video games or something solo. Anything that involves brain activity is good.
Brightmagic77
March 24th, 2016 8:31pm
You should move on. You are a good person he/she doesnt deserve a persone like you. They are not worth it.
Sizro
March 25th, 2016 9:43pm
I would recommend talking to someone you trust will help you, expressing your feeling about someone with someone else can really help with relieving pressure of still wanting your ex. Also remember to let go! There is a wide variety of people that are compatible with you! Also get rid of anything that reminds you of your ex, this can significantly reduce the chance of remembering your ex.
Anonymous
March 27th, 2016 6:59pm
If you really like your ex you could try to make up and become only friends. If they do not want to, you should surround yourself with friends who want to spend time with you. Go shopping or to the movies until you stop thinking about your ex altogether
dancingPillow85
March 31st, 2016 11:13pm
Entertain yourself with some activities and do stuff that makes you think about something else. Get to know yourself better, and then slowly heal and let them go.
LazyKoala
April 3rd, 2016 8:14am
This is totally normal for people who really feel strongly for an ex! However, in my experience, although this person is important to you, you have many other things that make you happy. Start by doing the things you love, with the people you love. Believe me, I've been through the "But they're perfect" thing before. Soon, you'll begin to realise that they're not perfect and you can do much better. Of course, if you really feel like you and your ex getting back together would be a good idea, then fight for them by all means, just be prepared that you may not get them back.
Aquadreamer4151
April 6th, 2016 4:17pm
try busying yourself with other things take up new hobbies or spend more time with the people you enjoy hanging out with
Anonymous
April 7th, 2016 3:06pm
Don't try to not think about it. You had happy memories that are worth cherishing. Those happy memories may be the only ones, but they were worth it
Mercedes
April 9th, 2016 2:10am
Pick up a hobby, mingle with other people, and get to know yourself. Write about your ex. Get all your feelings out. Do things that make you happy
Anonymous
April 10th, 2016 9:48am
Allow yourself to think about your ex. Pay attention to what you are feeling and what you are thinking about when you are thinking about your ex. Are you fantasizing about a future? Are you reminiscing on the past? Notice what was important to you about this relationship.
Aemelliah
April 13th, 2016 1:27pm
delete him and everything that resembles him from your life.meet new people,occupy yourself,find new hobbies and stop thinking of him
BornToHelpYou
April 13th, 2016 6:59pm
It is verynormal. You can't just get over someone in one day so those are your love feelings for him though with time they will surelygo away depending on how hard you try to move on the faster you try to forget him the faster those feelings will go away and try to fill the void doing something that you love. God bless. Take care :)
Anonymous
April 21st, 2016 6:26pm
maybe you still have feelings sit them down and talk about it and explain why it is you are thinking about them and try to find solutions
MoonlitHaze
April 29th, 2016 3:34pm
Well, for one, don't force yourself not to think about them. Chances are that will only make you think of them more and miss them. Also, remember that it's okay to miss someone you were once in love with, in fact it's very normal and even healthy, depending on the severity. If you feel as if you are still in love with the person and can talk about why you broke up in the first place and resolve it, maybe there is still something there. A lot of people breakup due to just lack of communicating. But also, you may just miss them. Just like when people chose to move to a different state. Yes, they will probably miss their old home, but only at a distance. It does not have to effect you and disrupt your life. Maybe you should remain friendly with your ex and just see how they are doing. Keep the friendship or even just let them know you still care about them. You loved them once, so there is nothing wrong with still caring about them and wondering how they are doing.
thesecretkeeper1115
May 1st, 2016 7:11am
Then, think about him/her. make a list of the things that you liked and hated/disliked about him/her. The list would help you decide whether he/she is worthy to be thought about.
Anonymous
May 4th, 2016 8:34am
The best things would be if you can find a healthy alternative thing to think about. Like I looked for different sports and made a few new friends. So if my mind thinks about my ex I have an re-direct procedure.
Anonymous
May 17th, 2016 6:51pm
Try going out for exercise or try a hobby that will take up most of your time. Soon enough, her thoughts will escape the building
Anonymous
June 26th, 2018 2:35am
Have so time for yourself. Remember that you have friends who can help you. Have a girls night out or boys night out. You need a time to yourself from all the mix feeling. Take a vacation or just do something fun you like