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I cheated, should I break up with my partner?

233 Answers
Last Updated: 06/30/2020 at 3:24am
I cheated, should I break up with my partner?
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
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Licensed Professional Counselor

A sex positive, and kink knowledgeable therapist with an open mindset and a clear understanding that we are all different.

Top Rated Answers
musicalDew34
January 7th, 2016 7:32pm
If you regret doing that then you must apolize to your partner and make them belive that you wont do that again...but once the trust is lost its gone forever...they will never see you the same way they used to see
ScarfyMia
January 8th, 2016 12:46pm
No. Talking to him may bring a better option that just plain breaking up, specially if you love them
Anonymous
January 8th, 2016 6:43pm
I don't recommend that you break up with your partner unless you have the urge to do it constantly. If you cheated and you know that it will be a one time thing then I suggest that you talk it out with your partner.
pirateofmyship
January 8th, 2016 10:51pm
No. You should try to sit with your partner and engage in a truthful conversation and come clean about your feelings, the problems you are facing and most important what motivated you to commit that act. They may not understand why you did it but sometimes the truth is more helpful and leaves your conscience in peace.
Anonymous
January 9th, 2016 2:21am
Maybe first ask yourself why you cheated. Are you dissatisfied with your current relationship? Maybe it is a sign that you need something different in your life. Is the problem something that could be helped by communicating it to your partner? If so, try coming clean, exploring the parts of the relationship that you feel need to be worked on, and maybe it will help you strengthen your relationship.
BronaghC
January 9th, 2016 1:00pm
You should come clean with him/her. Simple, if he loves you or if it is meant to be it will work itself out and he/she will forgive you. It's always the best to say what you did. If you were to stay with your partner you wouldn't want him/her to find out and months later he finds out then it to be worse and if you were to come clean, by them months you probably would be having a healthy happy relationship. Plus you would feel guilty through all those weeks and could result In a form of depression.
Anonymous
January 9th, 2016 9:35pm
Depends on the situation. What was the reason of cheating? What did it mean? If you truly care about the person you cheated on, you probably don't want to break up. If this is the case, fight for them.
darkshineblanket98
January 10th, 2016 2:58am
You should have broken up with them before Cheating . If you and when you love someone . You do not . Break their hearts because you chose to be selfish .. My ex Fiance recently cheated on me .. And well its his lost now .
GrowthMindset17
January 10th, 2016 3:31am
Yes you should. Unless you let your partner know what you did. Put yourself in the shoes of the other side., Would you like to be lied to ?
Anonymous
January 10th, 2016 1:28pm
if you cheated because you no longer love your partner , it's better to be honest and break up ... if it was a mistake just tell him/her and ask for forgiveness .. if they love you they will forgive you , altough they might take some time
Anonymous
January 10th, 2016 7:14pm
Absolutely... A relationship is based on trust and once that trust is broken there isn't any reason to continue forth into a relationship... I think it would've been better to have been honest about it with your partner and explain to them that it won't work anymore...
calmingKitty41
January 12th, 2016 6:15am
You should come clean to your partner and leave your partner if you are unhappy with them. Cheating is something this generation does not take lightly. It is understandable that people get urges to want to do stuff with other people but in a relationship, you are meant to stay committed to that one person.
exquisiteGrotto32
January 13th, 2016 12:30pm
From personal experience, I found it best to simply be honest with my partner that I have cheated. After you know what they say, the truth will set you free. Normally, there are two ways that this conversation could go. Number 1: You tell your partner that you have been unfaithful, they are upset but are willing to give you another chance seeing as you came clean and owned up to your mistake, or Number 2: You tell your partner you have cheated and they are upset and say that they can not be with you anymore. I am not saying this will definitely happen but this is how it normally goes down. Hope this helps :)
wonderfulWaterfall86
January 13th, 2016 3:16pm
Tell them what you have done immediately. If they decide to end the relationship, do not fret. People leave your life for a reason.
Anonymous
January 15th, 2016 6:48pm
if you confess with your partner about cheating upon him/ her and get apologised then its okay to continue
Anonymous
January 15th, 2016 11:25pm
This depends on how you feel about how you cheated. Being honest with your partner and letting them make their own decision may be a way forward. If you are unable to move on from it and it is making the relationship difficult then breaking up may be the best option
Meso93
January 16th, 2016 8:20am
No you shouldn't break with your partner, you should be honest and tell him/her you cheated and what's the reason behind it.
Anonymous
January 16th, 2016 3:16pm
I think before you break up with your partner think yourself first why you have cheated and what makes you do that are you going to cheat again does he or she deserves that if you have children what happened to them before destroy everything just think it over again sit with your partner confess it communication is the best policy be honest then see what happens.
ListeningWillow
January 16th, 2016 7:57pm
You should come clean and tell them that you are sorry. Just tell the truth. If you want them to stay just tell them that you are very sorry and regret it.
AnnaEMGee
January 16th, 2016 8:17pm
You should be honest with your partner, and talk about both your feelings once the initial shock has passed.
Elizabeth2016
January 17th, 2016 2:38am
Cheating is not the solution. It depends if you think that is best for your partner. Talk to your partner and be honest with them. It's better to tell them than them finding out themselves. So be honest and loyal :)
tranquilSunshine35
January 20th, 2016 7:13am
you should be honest with your partner.the fact that you trying to hide it could back fire .which could lead to a terrible situation
Alex7491
January 21st, 2016 1:45am
no, you should sit down and ave a conversation with them, to determine the next steps of the relationship. It might be hard, but worth it in the end.
truefrend
January 21st, 2016 9:47am
No , because their is lot before conclusion , first talk about it analyse , give yourself and the other some time , seek advice from few near and dear if you can talk , analyse with cool mind on careful analysis take your decision.
Emilysmthn
January 23rd, 2016 1:57pm
The first thing you should do is tell your partner. When your partner knows the facts, you will know how things should be. Your partner may forgive you and still want to be with you but it really depends on the situation. If the person you cheated with is someone you would rather be with than your current partner than obviously you should be with them if they make you feel better or you don't feel any regrets. You should not break up with your partner without telling them that you cheated, though. Although not telling them might seem like it would same them some pain, they deserve to know.
Anonymous
March 26th, 2016 6:37pm
i feel you should, unless they decide to give you a second chance, then you should feel grateful. what you did was wrong, and you should end it.
carlier231
March 25th, 2016 12:01am
I suggest that you tell your partner, and see how the two of you feel. If it hurts them and/or you, then I recommend that you leave the relationship.
lovelyDreamer51
March 25th, 2016 12:59pm
I think honesty is one of the most important things in a relationship. Would you rather tell your partner yourself or have him find out from somebody else? However your partner reacts to it and what they decide to do is important, and you should give them the space until they decide what they want.
Anonymous
March 24th, 2016 1:04pm
Perhaps, ask yourself. Why did I cheated on my partner? Do I feel guilty? Do I feel bad that I did it? I'm I afraid that I tel her/him I will lose him/her?
Lozzur
March 27th, 2016 9:39am
You need to have a sit down and think about why you cheated? I personally feel that its hard to come back from cheating. If you were cheated on how would you want to be handled?