I regret breaking up with my ex. What should I do?

168 Answers
Last Updated: 03/17/2019 at 3:43pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
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Melissa Hudson, MS Ed, PhD(c), LMFT

Marriage & Family Therapist

I work with clients of diverse backgrounds on a multitude of concerns. My approach is, at times, directive, yet always curious, nonjudgmental, collaborative, and validating.

Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
April 8th, 2018 10:16am
See if he's moved on, or if he feels the same way about you. If he does, then you should get back together with them, if they want.
Duckies76
April 8th, 2018 6:00pm
You should think about the reasons of your breakup and why you did it in the first place. Did you miss them after a certain amount of time? What did you miss about them? Outweigh the good against the bad and if it's more good, then decide if you can live with the bad, if you can then you should go for it. If you can't, it is probably time to move on, because people have a hard time changing their core behaviour and more often then not they fall back into old habit.
IamYourEar
April 11th, 2018 4:05am
You can write , call, text......or invite them to meet up.... And talk about it..... You broke up for a reason.... There must been a reason....you ended the relationship.... I wouldn't recommend you getting back together just because you might be lonely....or feeling like it was a mistake.... Let time heal the wounds .... But you can fix the regret by just making peace ....and trying to keep it friendly. Good luck! 💛💙
Anonymous
April 12th, 2018 2:31pm
Try talking to him/her. Reason it out. If it doesn't work out, its okay. You will be okay. Try being friends with them first.
thisisTeresa
April 19th, 2018 10:25pm
You should take your time to consider the reasons why you broke up and why you regret it. Is it because maybe you feel like you overeacted or is it because you feel lonely? It's very important to understand that you are doing it for the right reasons. If you realize that you do want to go back, do so.
Anonymous
April 26th, 2018 2:02pm
Try sending them a message to explain that you miss them and you regret breaking up and see if they feel the same. If they do, all it peachy! If not, then you'll need to take some steps in order to help you get over them. But it is important to grieve.
Thesecrethak
April 27th, 2018 8:29am
If you think that it was an error, you can go back, but if you think that this relationship is not what you need, then think that it's better for you, and that you have to close a chapter to start a new one.
LittleLemon96
April 27th, 2018 7:17pm
tell him honestly what you think, honesty is always a good solution ! overthinking about it can help you out
Anonymous
April 28th, 2018 1:09pm
Have a think and sit down. Why did you break up with them in the first place, are you willing to forgive them?
Anonymous
May 3rd, 2018 7:46pm
First think carefully at why you broke up with them in the first place. If you feel like you made a mistake then communicate with them and find a way forward
delightfulShiny35
May 13th, 2018 7:01pm
Just check up politely with him whether he is engaged with others. if not , tell him your feelings at this point of time and ask him he is ready to reconsider.
Ush88
May 31st, 2018 8:38am
Getting over someone is a process. Make sure that you surround yourself with positive people who want to help. Keep yourself busy, discover new forms of art (music, film, etc.). Also, try to think of all the negative aspects of the relationship, in the end you broke up for a reason.
Anonymous
June 3rd, 2018 6:03am
If you regret breaking up with your ex you first have to ask yourself what made you make that decision in the first place. You then also should way the cons and pros of your relationship. If you find your ex to be addicting or that you feel lost when you are not with them then maybe you should take some time for yourself.
sjxo06
June 7th, 2018 2:47pm
I think you should think about it really hard and make sure that you truly regret it. If you do, you should approach him in a nice manner and express to him these feelings that you’re having. Talking about it can always be beneficial.
Anonymous
June 7th, 2018 5:09pm
You regret breaking up with your ex. This could mean that you need to receive some closure and you want to make sure things end well or possibly you want to rekindle the relationship. I would suggest that you speak to him in a nice, composed and approachable manner and discuss how you feel and that you are feeling regrets and see what he thinks.
cassieisfire
June 7th, 2018 11:02pm
It is probably not a very good idea to go back to your ex, in my opinion, you must have left him for something so just try to move on from them
ElaineSaysHello
June 14th, 2018 6:59am
Focus on yourself, friend. There might be something about your ex that makes you want to go back, but think about the main reason why things didn't work out in the first place. Love yourself instead of hurting yourself. Love yourself by looking into healthy methods of self-care (hint: a good start is checking out our self-help guides here on 7 Cups!). Don't hurt yourself into returning to something that didn't turn out well. Breakups hurt a lot hun, and going into something that's on-and-off will potentially create more damage.
lovelyShiny78
June 22nd, 2018 12:51am
Accept that you have done it and it's in the past, you can try and talk to your ex but think about it is it the right thing for you and your ex, would it lead you to be better.
Happyvibez
June 22nd, 2018 4:35pm
LOVE your self first, ask your self why you broke up in the first place, take time to understand your emotions see if you miss the company or the person
Anonymous
June 24th, 2018 10:40am
Tell them it was an honest mistake letting them go and promise them that you won't do it again. Tell them second chances are always good.
lindaeu
June 27th, 2018 4:14pm
You should try to talk with her about your feelings, maybe yours ex also wants to come back to you.
colourfulWhisper37
July 7th, 2018 6:05am
Talk to your ex. Say what you feel and know How they feel. Say sorry and convence your ex that you realise your mistake.your ex will definitely forgive you. But even if your ex doesn't want to patchup than repect his/her feelings.
generousPrince61
July 7th, 2018 3:04pm
Seek out social support. Friends, family, and perhaps a counsellor. Really examine the reasons for breaking up. Have they changed? Feelings of sadness and missing an ex are absolutely normal even if you initiated the break up, but it doesn't mean the reasons for the breakup are wrong. Talking with people may give you insight into whether you're just experiencing normal pain from ending a relationship and losing someone who was a big part of your life. Or if you just needed space and time away from your ex and if you want to revisit the relationship to try to work things out. Ultimately only you can decide what is best to do. You are the expert on you.
Anonymous
July 8th, 2018 7:58am
Think if going back to them would be the besy thing for you. If so, approach them and apologize.
blueVase149
July 8th, 2018 3:58pm
Go to him. Talk ti him. Tell him yiu think you made a mistake. Tell you him love him still. And if he does not stop you give him a sweet little kiss and ask him if you could be together again? Give it a try.
Tigerlili
July 8th, 2018 5:19pm
You should talk to your ex and tell them how you feel. They may feel the same way. If you don’t tell them you feel this way they will never know and nothing could progress
RyGuyListener10
July 12th, 2018 12:42pm
Don't live in the past. Even though it's ok to remember the good times, there was a reason for the breakup. Remind yourself of the reason. It's normal to regret a breakup because we are greiving and we cannot simply shut off our feelings. In time, those feelings will fade, including the regret. Occupying your time and mind are great ways to deal with this. Plus, it's ok to let yourself be emotional and talk it out with someone you are comfortable with.
Anonymous
July 15th, 2018 2:44pm
Try telling him how you feel. explain that you didn't actually want to break up with him & that you were just having a bad time and you accidentally took it out on him.
Anonymous
July 19th, 2018 8:55pm
That is a difficult one to answer and help with. What you really need to look at is yourself and why you made the decision you did at the time and is it truly wanting to be back with your ex or is it because you do not want to feel alone after the break up?
Olivia9959
July 27th, 2018 6:22pm
What you can do would be to try to contact him and see if he answers and if he does you can first see if hes single and if he still feels a type of way for you.