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I still have dreams about my ex, sometimes they're good and sometimes they're bad. What does that mean?

214 Answers
Last Updated: 06/08/2022 at 1:20am
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
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Andrea Tuck, LCPC

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I tackle and discuss a multitude of social and emotional health issues. I have a belief that through empowerment and non-judgmental support clients' can thrive.

Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
December 10th, 2014 5:05pm
If you are still have dreams about your ex whether they be good or bad, that means that you still have mixed emotions about them and don't know how to feel about them.
guidamaximo
December 20th, 2014 8:21pm
It can mean a lot of things, it isn't the same for everyone. It can mean you miss him, you are worried about your situation, or it can mean absolutely nothing, don't worry too much about it :)
PashT007
April 26th, 2015 3:13am
Some dreams have meanings and some dreams don't. I have heard that people dream about others when they think about them heavily.
Aditi24
June 22nd, 2015 7:25am
Relationships tend to have long term effects on our lives. Its very important to understand even if the individual is not a part of our life anymore, feelings about him do exist in our subconscious mind and they reflect in form of dreams. Even if he is your ex this thoughts might be still inside you that are coming out
Anonymous
December 10th, 2014 1:34am
I view dreams as a good source of information about feelings and emotions at a deep, non-verbal level. "Dream analysis" is a mostly discredited form of early psychoanalysis that relied heavily on semiotics theory to make arbitrary assumptions and universal interpretations of what dreams mean. The best dream analysis is not someone else's, but your own. Like most information with emotional content, I think it is possible for dreams to mean not one thing or another, but there are many possible interpretations based on the context of what you went through with your girlfriend and how you feel about her now. Either way, your dreams may be trying to tell you something. Listen to them, and interpret them in the most meaningful way for you.
chanelellierhea5
November 3rd, 2015 9:03pm
The meaning of your dreams can be a number of things. Maybe you miss them, maybe you wonder how they're doing, or maybe you didn't get the closure you wanted/needed. Regardless of your situation, dreams are caused by what's going on in your subconscious mind which is leading to these dreams you are having. Unfortunately, we cannot control our dreams.
PaintsGrayscaleHearts
January 5th, 2015 3:31pm
It doesn't mean anything strongly.. I just mean you still think of him. Do you think of him before bed? Sometimes this is the cause why. People tend to dream about the last thing they think of. Other than that, dreams are dreams. Not reality. People can come and go in these dreams.
Anonymous
January 26th, 2017 5:47pm
Having dreams about a person we were close to or are close to is normal. While we sleep our brain is processing and organizing a lot of information. Missing someone, unresolved feelings of grief, etc. can show up in dreams. If you're not thinking about them during the day, your subconscious can still think about them, hence they show up in your dreams, be it as a reminder of the good times, maybe a wish to have the back or a reminder of what went wrong.
DipityEnigma
April 16th, 2015 3:46pm
Usually when people have reoccurring thoughts or dreams about an ex, it usually means that they have some regret about the relationship ending. The good dreams remind you of how good the relationship was but the bad dreams remind you of why the relationship may not have worked. I always stick by this motto: "Ex's are ex's for a reason". Try hard at a relationship and if it ends, at least you can say it tried but always remember why your broke up in the first place.
colourfulRose14
March 15th, 2015 9:51am
You miss them, but this normally happens after a break up.. just ignore it. unless you miss them a lot..
avanef
April 20th, 2017 8:51pm
Dreams are dreams. I, too, had the same thing happening to me. I wouldn't worry about it, just your mind helping you move on and most of the time dreams are just harmless things we dream about in bed.
Anonymous
April 17th, 2015 3:22pm
if I am thinking about the good things we had, I have good dreams about him, when I think about the bad things, I have bad dreams about him
IsisWondeerland
June 3rd, 2015 3:22am
Well, I can know excatly why, but I think the reason why we dream what we dream comes from the most deeps of wishes. Maybe you need to sit, think and analize what you're felling for this person and why...
eQuatiun
October 15th, 2016 9:46pm
Dreaming about your ex can mean multiple things. For example, you can be dreaming about your ex because you had a very deep connection with this person, it was someone who meant a lot to you and you most likely still care about them. Dreaming about your ex does in no way mean that you are still in love with them (that is also a possibility), but that you have been. If you are experiencing mixed dreams (good and bad), it might mean that you are moving on, because one part of your brain misses the person you were with, while the other might be happy that you are no longer together. Personally when I have ended a relationship I usually miss being in a relationship more than the person, which is when I know we should not be together. In other words, dreaming about them can mean a lot of things, but overall you shouldn't worry too much about it.
LaPetiteBear
March 1st, 2016 9:20am
I believe this means you could possibly have underlying feelings for your ex partner. Maybe romantically, maybe resentfully. I think it is important to address these lingering emotions, whether they be positive or negative, as I strongly believe that this will assist you in progressing forward.
LifeCoach4U
December 10th, 2014 1:39am
It means you're missing that person or what routine you used to have. Just because that person isn't in your life anymore it doesn't mean your thoughts of them go away. Our daily grind is usually reflected in our dreams.
Oscar029
October 28th, 2018 8:44am
Your mind is trying to get one them. You're not sure how you feel about them and things keep replaying in your head. Distract yourself. You're strong. You're surviving without your ex. Thinking you need them in your life is something you led yourself to believe. The feeling they gave you when they were there was like none other you have ever felt before. That's why it was so special. But it's all just a mental mind game. You fell for them, they fell for you. As soon as their feelings change, maybe yours didn't. But that doesn't change who you are. You're still strong and independent. Nothing but you can change that.
Hummingbirdxo
April 23rd, 2017 1:20am
It isn't necessarily a good thing nor a bad thing, nor does it mean you miss that particular person. I think it is just your subconscious telling you that you may miss those memories with that person, or something particularly good about your past lover is missing in your present lover.
AshThePaperGirl
January 11th, 2017 3:07pm
It means you unconsciously still think of him/her. But please remember that just because a person is on your mind or you can't let them go, doesn't necessarily mean they're good for you. There's a reason they're ex right? It all depends on you what decision you take. learn from the past yet know what is important and must be done. Take care, my best wishes.
Rebelyell90
November 3rd, 2016 9:51am
It means that you have not moved forward in your life completely, if there is some unresolved business you need to address this with yourself or your ex for closeure.
Bookiie
January 8th, 2021 3:26pm
This can also mean something but also it doesn't have to mean anything. Dreams are really complex, and scientists haven't figured them out completely. But for now, they are going along with the theory that dreams are just a random activation of your neural circles, meaning it can be literally anything that is already inside your brain - for example, you can dream of a bear in a tuxedo (you already have images of both bears and tuxedos) and that dream doesn't have to mean anything. Dreams can also be impacted by your daily life, so if you have seen something that reminded you of your ex or the ex themselves, there is also the possibility you will dream about them. And to say that you dream of them because you still have feelings (either good or bad) is too far fetched, there is no science behind that meaning and thus we shouldn't rely on that type of reasoning.
SMILEWIDE101
April 11th, 2015 1:42pm
love remains forever in our hearts and souls. He was a true love who made you feel different. He cause different emotions and feelings bubble up inside u maybe its just those emotions coming back.
Anonymous
April 15th, 2015 10:37pm
it can mean many things but it does seem to mean you and your ex meant a lot in each others life it reflects your relationship in a way one bad thing might be the fact their your ex plus if you want them to stop getting that out might help
MiniAshMart
May 27th, 2019 4:58am
It’s typical to dream about your ex. You’re merely managing these images and memories as a way to fill in some of the gaps you might be missing as a person. However bad the experience was with your ex; your brain is utilizing it to develop. There is no exact way to adequately explain dreams or the chosen people who manifest within them. Our brains use dreaming as a way to recover from stress, past traumas, or to make sense of events we may not fully grasp. Your ex may also play a role in your life, and you yourself may not barely grasp it. This is partially anticipated to psychological habit, partially due to what your ex represents to you, and partially due to an attempt to heal unresolved issues like the reason for the breakup.
Anonymous
July 6th, 2019 3:12pm
In my experience it always meant that I missed them. But was conflicted about how I felt about them being in my life. When you love someone it can be difficult to differentiate behaviors that they are exhibiting as unhealthy for you because you love them so much, you are temporarily blinded. After it's over those feelings of love just don't disappear but they are accompanied with the hurt from the break up now. I was torn between loving my ex and being hurt by them. That's why my dreams about them were so conflicting. I hope this helped.
sunshine0001
July 4th, 2019 5:17pm
Sounds like you might have mixed feelings about your ex- You treasure the good times and good qualities that made you like the person in the first place, but you might also feel conflicted in terms of the possibly toxic or difficult properties of your ex that you seem to deal with within your dreams. If this is a possibility (you are the expert of yourself) it is completely normal and understandable to feel that way. That person was probably once very important to you so it is okay to have mixed emotions about him/her. Does this sounds like something you might be experiencing?
ArabellaHazeldine
June 27th, 2019 2:54am
It doesn’t mean anything really. The mind is a very complex thing. Sometime you can dream about you ex because you’re nostalgic about the past, doesn’t necessarily mean the relationship, just past things that have happened. Maybe memories you had together. Maybe they’re bad because they’re reminding you about what happened and you’re still upset about the past. Or maybe it’s because you’re thinking of the bad things because you know you’re stronger to go back to somebody who did you wrong (if that was the case). Don’t listen to the dreams. Follow what you want in your clear head.
Hanaa00
June 12th, 2019 11:15pm
I will try and answer this question as honestly as i can, and also by sharing my own experience, since I personally do not believe that there is an objective answer to it. So, at the moment, i am in a similar situation, and i have also asked myself this question. In my personal case, i feel like i have sort of “forced” myself to move on from losing my ex, i have tricked my own mind into thinking that i am not as affected by that breakup as I actually am. So, when i dream about him, I believe that’s just my subconsciousness reminding me that I haven’t gotten over that situation yet, that i still think about him although i put so much effort into not doing it. But things need time to heal, and we all need time before we can say that we have moved on completely, and that is okay.
zealsunshine09
March 22nd, 2019 10:24am
It means that sometimes you subconsciously think about him and that is alright as we do think about people we care about or who we cared about in the past perhaps you may want to figure out why is it that you are thinking about him and that will help you reflect on your feelings towards the dreams you have about him. If you feel like you need to vent or have unresolved thoughts confide in a friend and tell them about your feelings to get some perspective as well. And If you feel like you can't do that talk to us at 7 cups we are here to listen
Undertheseaaaa
November 22nd, 2018 7:19pm
I think when any kind of relationship ends, being either romantic/friendship or anything we will always have feelings and emotions that stay with us and I think you having dreams about your ex is your mind and body's way of getting over it and moving on. Coming to terms with things can be really hard and sometimes can take a little time. Maybe you could try and sit whilst you're awake and think things through. How are you feeling about the relationship you guys had now? Do you miss him/her? Are you wishing maybe you guys could work things out? Did they hurt you in some kind of way?