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I still have dreams about my ex, sometimes they're good and sometimes they're bad. What does that mean?

197 Answers
Last Updated: 03/27/2021 at 7:55am
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Amelia Winsby, PsyD

Psychologist

I often work with clients who experience a wide range of emotions and difficulties. I am non-judgmental and enjoy working with individuals from all walks of life.

Top Rated Answers
jamestirth34
October 7th, 2015 4:04pm
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ALovingPeony
October 8th, 2015 12:55pm
It may be your mind just processing certain things in regards to your ex. People often dream about their past relationships even if they're completely over that person. That's completely normal :)
MattRayne
November 3rd, 2015 1:28pm
The meaning of dreams is firmly subjective. According to many people, dreaming about a person means that you miss her. In my opinion, we should begin our thinking parting that an ex was (or is still) an important person for you. Dreaming about her/him should not be a shameful or sad experience. Dream, laugh, cry. I can relate with you. I understand you, we understand you. It's not easy to overcome a relationship, but it's not impossible either. Smile :) .
krazeniks
November 30th, 2015 3:37pm
Well....dreams are visual pictures of your experiences ,your expectations and your emotions.....they can be good and bad...so no point in worrying!!
Unaragazzacomete
February 1st, 2016 1:55pm
You will always have him in your mind if you onced loved him because you have given him a piece of your heart it just means that deep down you will always think of him but that you have to leave him in the past an use both the good ad the bad memories no move on
Greatlistener87
April 11th, 2016 4:49am
It just means that you have not let go of your past. It is good if you can find out how to let go and forgive your ex. Then only you can move forward.
Anonymous
August 16th, 2016 7:54pm
You might still have your ex in the back of your mind. You could be feeling some mixed emotions towards them causing these dreams.
mywhispersscreamed3201
August 22nd, 2016 3:28pm
It just means that he is in your subconscious and you still think about him. It isn't good or bad. He was a part of your life, maybe even a major one. It is completely normal. Don't fret about it too much.
JD821
September 15th, 2016 3:13pm
In your subconscious you still have them, they were apart of your lives, memories were made and sometimes that isn't an easy thing to let go of. It can mean several things, that you still have a feeling toward them, or in general they deeply affected you emotionally, whether positive or negative.
Anonymous
September 20th, 2016 11:43pm
I would say that this is normal. This a person who you loved and spent a portion of your life with. This person is obviously still in your subconscious mind and your dreams are the result of this. It's kind of like your brain is slowly rewiring itself and sorting out all the memories you have.
sophj19
September 22nd, 2016 9:54pm
Do not read too much into them. Dreams can mean a number of this. What is your general opinion of your ex? This is what matters.
Breather19
September 25th, 2016 6:59pm
It means you are a normal human being going through something you can overcome. Sometimes there are words better left unsaid, as well as questions left unanswered. So, don't stress yourself figuring out the meaning of those dreams, instead let it all pass and dust it all off. There's no point of dwelling on what's already done.
hantohelp
September 29th, 2016 2:36pm
When we have dreams, this can be a way of accessing our unconcious mind. Dreaming about your ex could be just due to thinking about them during the day or maybe you've seen them doing something on facebook. Whether it is good or bad, it could be a sign that you need some closure.
Anonymous
September 30th, 2016 10:32pm
Dreams are the memories that are deep in our minds. If you still have dreams about your ex, it shows you still aren't over him/her.
Anonymous
October 1st, 2016 8:38pm
You're adjusting, it's okay to remember the good times you shared together, but it also shows you're moving on and finding your feet without them
colourfulJoy47
October 2nd, 2016 3:19pm
it means you have mixed feeling about the relationship now not sure if you regret or loved it its personal but i cant tell you how you feel
WorkInProgress11
October 12th, 2016 3:12pm
Usually our dreams reflect something that we've been anxious about or thinking about a lot. Do you find yourself still thinking about your ex? Are you upset about how things ended between you? Dreams are our brains' way of working through things while we sleep, so maybe, at least subconsciously, you haven't resolved all of your feelings towards your ex and your relationship.
KindBean2002
October 12th, 2016 5:13pm
I think you are insecure about your ex. Maybe you have a love-hate relationship to him, still. I have experienced the same thing, just with a crush.
tranquilDay37
October 14th, 2016 1:10am
Dreams are an interesting thing. I belive that ideas manifest themselves in your dreams. They may not be actual signs of that particular event occurring in your dream, but more signs of something deeper. I often wonder how true this is, though, with the crazy dreams I tend to have. But in my experience, dreams about an ex either means I'm nostalgic and thinking about memories with him. Other times it means there's something in my current relationship that I'm missing that I had in him. Bad dreams about your ex could mean an unclosed chapter. Good dreams could mean you're feeling content with your path.
YellowHouse213
October 16th, 2016 2:12am
Dreams are way of processing the things that have been happening in our lives. Sometimes they can be fun and other times they can be nightmares. Journaling about the things that you are dreaming about can be very helpful. It can also help you figure out how you really feel about your ex.
HelpWisely
October 23rd, 2016 7:35am
They are just dreams coming from an unconsciousness part of your mind, they don't mean anything at all and have no value because the only reality of life is what you experience in an awakened state.
uniquecreature41
October 27th, 2016 10:58am
It means this person was a fixture in your life for a time and just because they now belong in the 'ex' category doesn't mean your subconscious is going to wipe them from your memory banks in the short term! It's also a sign that your break up is still relatively fresh; filling your time and brain with an activity that interests you will soon mean your brain is occupied with other things and those dreams will become few and far between.
TheRealMadison
October 27th, 2016 4:36pm
ive had this happen before, sometimes theyre secretly still on your mind. once youre with someone for a while, and you break up, its hard to accept the new change. your conscious is still used to having them around.
Anonymous
November 5th, 2016 5:51pm
It means that you're still somewhat emotionally invested. When someone ceases to matter to you completely, they don't feature in your conscious or subconscious thoughts regularly. If it does happen, it's extremely rare. In your case, the emotions you still harbour may be positive or negative (pain, anger, etc) or a mixture of both.
Anonymous
November 11th, 2016 7:30pm
I dream all the time about my ex. I used to believe in dream symbols and hidden meanings, but nowadays I'm of the belief that dreams are just your brain taking bits and pieces from all your past experiences (whether you remember them happening or not) and making up scenarios. I think a common scientific explanation for dreams is that it is your brain trying to "make sense" of things that it found puzzling during your waking hours. Dreaming of your ex is understandable; they presumably were a big part of your life - that won't have gone unnoticed by your brain!
DrumDude
November 16th, 2016 7:46am
There are many, many theories about "what dreams mean". IMO and observation, dreams are simply about what is up for us. Sometimes they're about what is on our conscious minds, and they may just reflect simple events in our lives. Often they are about what's in our unconscious mind, that is, what is up for us but we don't really want to think about, so we have pushed those thoughts away. But that stuff is still there, just further down (i.e. in the subconscious). So dreaming about an ex just means that person is on our mind, even if we don't realize it. That is exactly as we would expect -- that person was important in our life, even if we have moved on, even if we would like to forget them (or not). So the good and the bad dreams about an ex, they just reflect all of our different feelings about that person.. Some memories are good, some are bad, but these memories are simply there. Reflecting on these dreams is good, it's how we learn what is deeper down in our subconscious mind. There's no big message to be learned IMO, just an understanding that our ex was important in our lives, and important things from the past continue to effect us, which is natural and okay.
Anonymous
November 23rd, 2016 9:57am
I also have dreams like that. And it makes me miss him and our times together. But I think that it only means that your ex became a part of your life
Anonymous
December 3rd, 2016 2:14pm
Dreaming about your ex, regardless if it's bad or good dreams about him/her can also reflect on how you feel about him/her. Sometimes, it could be that you think of this person daily which can result in dreaming about them
blackdarkness1313
December 23rd, 2016 12:57am
It could mean that you still love them or that they did something bad to you during the relationship and you are scared of it happening again
Anonymous
March 9th, 2017 2:47pm
Dreams are a complicated concept. From my understanding they don't necessarily mean anything specific about your past but it could just mean you are still working on getting over your past so your mind is working on it even while you are asleep. It's okay, and I wouldn't let that be something that gets you down. You're working on processing things so don't beat yourself up and continue working on yourself and you will be pleasantly surprised :)