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I still love my ex. Should I feel this way?

408 Answers
Last Updated: 01/17/2020 at 2:44pm
I still love my ex. Should I feel this way?
★ This question about Breakups was starred by a moderator on 5/12/2016.
1 Tip to Feel Better
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Moderated by

Courtney Cline, MS in Psychology and MS in criminal Justice


I have 15 years exeperience in working with clients suffering from depression and substance abuse. I have worked with children and adults and believe in a holistic view.

Top Rated Answers
December 31st, 2015 4:59pm
Yes some people feel this way. If you still love him and he like you still you should ask him out.its up to you.
December 31st, 2015 9:12pm
That is completely okay! Sometimes you can still love each other but can't be together because maybe the time isn't right or something else.
January 1st, 2016 7:08am
Absolutely! In some ways you never stop loving someone you shared a peroid of your life with. I feel that is even stronger when there are children involved. I am.divorced. my husband left me for another woman. It took me 10 years to recover and stop loving and hurting. Love is a good thing. Its better than hate. However you.also deserve to be loved in return. Care for him but love yourself more.
January 1st, 2016 8:02am
It depends on you, if you don't have anyone in your life and you love your ex. So, you need talk to them and find the solution.
January 1st, 2016 6:01pm
It's normal. You put so much time and love into this person, and in the end, it feels wasted. It takes time to get over them, and soon enough you will notice the love for them to start to disappear.
January 2nd, 2016 6:04am
It all depends on your own situation. If you weren't expecting a breakup, and you were perfectly happy with the relationship and had no intentions for it to end - then it's perfectly normal for you to still love them. Sometimes things don't work out due to the circumstances and not the person, sometimes it's a matter of situations that can't be dealt with. As I see it, even if you've broken up with someone, it doesn't necessarily mean that you have emotionally severed the bond you had with someone.
January 2nd, 2016 6:14am
The worst thing about time is it takes time ...and eventually it will fade away but if this feelings are being an obstacle and making it hard for you to move on than yes you should think about it and let go ...
January 2nd, 2016 4:07pm
it is normal, if you developed feelings towards any person and shared memories and aspects of your life with them it's ridiculous to ask yo to forget him/her, those feelings may never disappear but with time they will slowly get smaller, to the point that if you see her/him again in 4 or 5 years maybe you won't help but smile, but you'll be aable to continue on with your own life. The important thing here is things can't be expected to change from one day to another, feelings are no exception, even if the other person hurt you. It's only matter of time.
January 3rd, 2016 3:31pm
It is very normal. It is hard to get over someone easily, but if he is no good for you, try occupying your time by reading books, doing activities, going out with your friends and eventually you will find someone who truly appreciates you and you will get your mind off of him. :)
January 3rd, 2016 8:08pm
Break ups are always hard. When a couple break up is not because they don't love each other anymore, sometimes one of them still love his/her patner, even when they have break up a long time ago
January 6th, 2016 2:24am
There is no "should" in the world of feelings and romance. There is no right or wrong, so don't beat yourself up over that. It's okay if you feel this way, and it is a very common feeling as well!
January 6th, 2016 4:42am
There is no specific way to feel. Feeling that way only shows that there are things that you still don't discover about yourself and will need time to.
January 6th, 2016 5:39pm
Just because you broke up doesn't mean all of your feelings for them are gone. It took me 7 months to stop loving my ex and he was very unkind to me after we broke up. You will get over them I promise
- Expert in Breakups
January 6th, 2016 7:09pm
It's completely normal to feel that way after spending so much time with someone who you had deep feelings about. And frankly, you'll probably feel this way for a while but don't worry, the feelings will subside, but depending on how to relationship was, the feeling might always be there, lingering in the back of your mind but like I said before, it's normal.
January 6th, 2016 7:29pm
Its completely normal to still have feelings for your ex after a break up it takes the normal human being 7 months and 21 days to get over someone
January 7th, 2016 4:35am
There's nothing wrong with you feeling this way. When you truly love someone and it doesn't work out, it is completely normal for you to still have feelings. Maybe you need closure or maybe you just need more time to get over this person.
January 7th, 2016 7:31am
It is 100% okay to still love your ex. You showed someone else a side no one else has gotten to see. You got to be 100% yourself with them. There were so many deep and amazing moments. Overall, it's okay to miss them and still love them.
January 7th, 2016 8:56am
Love is love, and if you love someone that is good, if they love to back that's even better, butntherenis no right or wrong person to be in love with.
January 7th, 2016 2:11pm
It's totally normal to love someone. If you didn't, you wouldn't have been with them in the first place. And even thought you broke up, or they hurt you or, whatever the situation, that feeling doesn't just disappear automatically. But the stronger love here, is the love for yourself. To know the right and best thing to do for you to move forward with your like in a content, healthy way. Even if it is hard. Give yourself some time, and space. Do things that you want to do, and clear your mind to actually understand all the reasons and sides to what happened. Forgive them, and forgive yourself.
January 7th, 2016 7:27pm
Its okay to be in love with your ex but to a certain extent..we must never forget to love those people too who are around us and who love us
January 8th, 2016 3:42am
Still having love for ex os quiet comon.. dont worry about it.. It takes time to getbout of this love feeling and getting hatred towards someone who was so spl for us is really hard... I guess its okay to feel so but you will have to koveon as time goes by.
January 8th, 2016 6:29am
I understand how you feel, I've felt the same way, in fact I feel the same way right now. What I've found is that I can love someone and yet not necessarily be "In Love" with them. I still love my first boyfriend from when I was 12 years old, I still love my boyfriend of ten years, whom I just broke up with a few days ago. It is perfectly normal to feel this way, remind yourself that your feelings are valid and normal. Take a deep breath when you feel overwhelmed by these emotions and then just let go. Loving your ex also doesn't mean you'll never love another again, there is room in your heart for the future. There is room in your heart for yourself.
January 8th, 2016 5:01pm
It's absolutely normal to love and suffer.All emotions are normal since we are human beings.Even animals feel love.
January 9th, 2016 3:41am
It is totally okay to feel this way. It just matters how you deal with your feelings. Often it is better to face your feelings and lay them to rest instead of hiding them. It might take you a lot of time to finally get over your ex but eventually the time will come.
January 9th, 2016 4:48am
It's perfectly normal to feel this way, whether it was a postivie or negative experience.. No matter how you feel is ok. We just need to work through our feelings to get to the other side and move on. Every relationship experience helps us learn what kind of person we are, and what kind of person is best for us. It may feel like you'll never find feel this way about anyone else, or that no one will love you as much, but it's not true at all. There is always someone else.
January 9th, 2016 8:51am
Yes i thinks a normal feeling after a breakup specially if you didnt want to breakup in the first place
January 9th, 2016 5:33pm
It is normal after you have broken up and you may feel like this for a while so don't feel like your the odd one out.
January 9th, 2016 10:07pm
I cannot speak from experience because I have never been in a relationship, but I did have a crush on someone I went to high school with for 6 long years. There was a part of me that worried I would never get over him. But within the last year, my feelings have dissipated. He'll pop into my head every now and then, but generally I don't think about him anymore. I learned from this that no feeling is ever permanent, particularly pain. Pain is temporary. Another feeling will come along and replace it. Love, joy, peace, passion. And I also learned that you may always have someone burned in the back of your brain. But that's just it. They are at the back of your brain, taking up a very small space. This leaves a lot of room for other thoughts and feelings. Feelings for your family, friends, job, pet, hobbies, passions. Life is not hopeless. Even when it achingly feels like it is, it's not. There is always hope. I promise you.
January 10th, 2016 2:35am
It is okay to still love an ex, you can't simply not fall out of love. That love is always going to be there, it gets easier over time. Try to do activities to get your mind off things!
January 10th, 2016 3:37am
Yes it is normal. That person is still important to you. Maybe you should try it again with them? Or you could try to move on.