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I still love my ex. Should I feel this way?

415 Answers
Last Updated: 03/27/2022 at 3:04pm
I still love my ex. Should I feel this way?
★ This question about Breakups was starred by a moderator on 5/12/2016.
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Top Rated Answers
Brandonbadn
January 2nd, 2016 4:07pm
it is normal, if you developed feelings towards any person and shared memories and aspects of your life with them it's ridiculous to ask yo to forget him/her, those feelings may never disappear but with time they will slowly get smaller, to the point that if you see her/him again in 4 or 5 years maybe you won't help but smile, but you'll be aable to continue on with your own life. The important thing here is things can't be expected to change from one day to another, feelings are no exception, even if the other person hurt you. It's only matter of time.
foreveralistener
January 3rd, 2016 3:31pm
It is very normal. It is hard to get over someone easily, but if he is no good for you, try occupying your time by reading books, doing activities, going out with your friends and eventually you will find someone who truly appreciates you and you will get your mind off of him. :)
xwallflower
January 3rd, 2016 8:08pm
Break ups are always hard. When a couple break up is not because they don't love each other anymore, sometimes one of them still love his/her patner, even when they have break up a long time ago
Anonymous
January 6th, 2016 4:42am
There is no specific way to feel. Feeling that way only shows that there are things that you still don't discover about yourself and will need time to.
Anonymous
January 6th, 2016 5:39pm
Just because you broke up doesn't mean all of your feelings for them are gone. It took me 7 months to stop loving my ex and he was very unkind to me after we broke up. You will get over them I promise
Anonymous
January 6th, 2016 7:29pm
Its completely normal to still have feelings for your ex after a break up it takes the normal human being 7 months and 21 days to get over someone
positiveLove82
January 7th, 2016 4:35am
There's nothing wrong with you feeling this way. When you truly love someone and it doesn't work out, it is completely normal for you to still have feelings. Maybe you need closure or maybe you just need more time to get over this person.
Anonymous
January 7th, 2016 2:11pm
It's totally normal to love someone. If you didn't, you wouldn't have been with them in the first place. And even thought you broke up, or they hurt you or, whatever the situation, that feeling doesn't just disappear automatically. But the stronger love here, is the love for yourself. To know the right and best thing to do for you to move forward with your like in a content, healthy way. Even if it is hard. Give yourself some time, and space. Do things that you want to do, and clear your mind to actually understand all the reasons and sides to what happened. Forgive them, and forgive yourself.
caringIceCream67
January 8th, 2016 3:42am
Still having love for ex os quiet comon.. dont worry about it.. It takes time to getbout of this love feeling and getting hatred towards someone who was so spl for us is really hard... I guess its okay to feel so but you will have to koveon as time goes by.
ZedGirl
January 8th, 2016 6:29am
I understand how you feel, I've felt the same way, in fact I feel the same way right now. What I've found is that I can love someone and yet not necessarily be "In Love" with them. I still love my first boyfriend from when I was 12 years old, I still love my boyfriend of ten years, whom I just broke up with a few days ago. It is perfectly normal to feel this way, remind yourself that your feelings are valid and normal. Take a deep breath when you feel overwhelmed by these emotions and then just let go. Loving your ex also doesn't mean you'll never love another again, there is room in your heart for the future. There is room in your heart for yourself.
Anonymous
January 8th, 2016 5:01pm
It's absolutely normal to love and suffer.All emotions are normal since we are human beings.Even animals feel love.
TimtheNurse
January 9th, 2016 3:41am
It is totally okay to feel this way. It just matters how you deal with your feelings. Often it is better to face your feelings and lay them to rest instead of hiding them. It might take you a lot of time to finally get over your ex but eventually the time will come.
Anonymous
January 9th, 2016 4:48am
It's perfectly normal to feel this way, whether it was a postivie or negative experience.. No matter how you feel is ok. We just need to work through our feelings to get to the other side and move on. Every relationship experience helps us learn what kind of person we are, and what kind of person is best for us. It may feel like you'll never find feel this way about anyone else, or that no one will love you as much, but it's not true at all. There is always someone else.
organticBraid80
January 9th, 2016 5:33pm
It is normal after you have broken up and you may feel like this for a while so don't feel like your the odd one out.
Anonymous
January 9th, 2016 10:07pm
I cannot speak from experience because I have never been in a relationship, but I did have a crush on someone I went to high school with for 6 long years. There was a part of me that worried I would never get over him. But within the last year, my feelings have dissipated. He'll pop into my head every now and then, but generally I don't think about him anymore. I learned from this that no feeling is ever permanent, particularly pain. Pain is temporary. Another feeling will come along and replace it. Love, joy, peace, passion. And I also learned that you may always have someone burned in the back of your brain. But that's just it. They are at the back of your brain, taking up a very small space. This leaves a lot of room for other thoughts and feelings. Feelings for your family, friends, job, pet, hobbies, passions. Life is not hopeless. Even when it achingly feels like it is, it's not. There is always hope. I promise you.
Anonymous
January 10th, 2016 2:35am
It is okay to still love an ex, you can't simply not fall out of love. That love is always going to be there, it gets easier over time. Try to do activities to get your mind off things!
GrowthMindset17
January 10th, 2016 3:37am
Yes it is normal. That person is still important to you. Maybe you should try it again with them? Or you could try to move on.
arcticunicorn
January 10th, 2016 2:46pm
Getting over people is very challenging. It will take time to get over your ex especially if they hurt you. Take all the time you need and don't feel bad if the other person moved on. It doesn't make your value as a person less. Don't rush things and don't try looking for someone new because it will make you feel even worst.
beautifulLight666
January 10th, 2016 8:09pm
of course, but question the way you were treated, was it positive or negative, remember if it was healthy or unhealthy
ListenLady91
January 11th, 2016 7:26am
It is completely natural to feel this way. Getting over and ex isn't easy, and it can take a long time to get over them. But with time and patience, we learn what our next step is to either fix ourselves or maybe even rekindle our relationships if they can be in a healthy way. Feelings take time to process and heal. Don't feel discouraged if you still feel this way, we've all been there before.
Anonymous
January 13th, 2016 12:24pm
Then he/she is not your ex! Perhaps you need some rehabilitation or you should fall in love with someone else!
Anonymous
January 16th, 2016 9:27am
It is ok to feel this way. It is just that you haven't started your new chapter yet. And when you do you will learn to love someone else.
Anonymous
January 17th, 2016 6:38pm
All feelings are valid. Perhaps speaking with someone you trust or writing out your feelings and braking down your thoughts could help you feel more comfortable.
Anonymous
January 20th, 2016 8:32pm
Well, you're ex is the person that you may/may not have slept with but you really liked or even loved. You'r heart doesn't having a keyboard to type into and say stop loving him/her, it's still going to have feelings for the person. Hanging onto an ex isn't exactly healthy,as if they've moved on so should you. Unless you want to get back together but anyways. It takes a while to get over your relationship and break-up so it's natural but it shouldn't be to a "pining over" state because that's unhealthy.
KayDavica
January 20th, 2016 10:16pm
We're both in the same boat and guess what? It is perfectly normal. It is quite difficult to 'fall out of love' with someone who you firmly believed to be 'the one' as I am sure you have. You've invested a lot of time, energy and emotions into this person. No one is ever emotionally prepared for a breakup and it takes time to really move on from someone.....especially if we're holding on to memories and the feelings that are associated with them. Try to embrace those feelings and come to terms with what has happened, and when you are ready you will let them go. At the end of the day, we are the only ones responsible for our happiness. :)
angeldez94
January 21st, 2016 1:01am
Yes, it's normal. But very unhealthy because you could ruin both you & your next relationship being stuck to an ex. Talk it out with your ex if feelings are still the same.
thewallflowerlea
January 21st, 2016 8:03am
There is nothing wrong with loving your ex. If your breakup was unexpected it's normal to love your ex because they just dissapeared in your life, left a hole and you would do everything to get him back. Time heals and you'll get over him but you miss him. DO something you like and enjoy your time, he will disappear from your mind slowly , but he will.
Anonymous
January 22nd, 2016 1:11pm
I can see you still love your boyfriend. it is normal on my point of view. make sure you get healed and try to move on or go back and ask if its possible to have his love back
Anonymous
January 22nd, 2016 1:32pm
Its OK. You used to love each other and now that your separated your feelings cant just magically go away. It may take some time and be hard not to approach your ex but give it some time.
royalLily78
January 23rd, 2016 5:20pm
I still love my ex to and its not a matter of weather you should or shouldn't. whatever your feeling is how you should feel. there is no wrong or right to the way you feel