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is it a bad thing to stay in love with someone who left you?

309 Answers
Last Updated: 04/22/2020 at 11:38pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Brenda Munroe, LCSW

Clinical Social Work/Therapist

As a Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW), I have worked with individuals of all ages. My work with clients is supportive, interactive and nonjudgmental.

Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
September 10th, 2016 12:57pm
It is absolutely not. However, over the time it may affect you negatively since you will get overwhelmed over this feeling. So every now and then try to find some fun activities that will you help you more than loving someone who left you. Read an inspirational book, listen to fun music, try to paint something, sing to yourself, dance to the mirrors. Anything works good enough :)
DylanNz
September 10th, 2016 4:12pm
No it's not, I have felt the same way before. Being left by someone you love is a hard thing and can take a lot to move past. You aren't expected to just stop being in love with someone. Take time for yourself.
alexandrism
September 10th, 2016 6:43pm
It's not a bad thing to keep having feelings for whoever who has left you specially if that person did not wrong you and they were good for you. the feelings will vanish with time and you will be able to overcome it with time but most importantly if that person harmed you, you will definetly need to reconsider the bad things which will be easier for you to let go
Anonymous
September 10th, 2016 9:16pm
I wouldn't call it a bad thing, but If he hurt you, you are better off without him. You are a strong independent woman.
Anonymous
September 14th, 2016 6:51am
It's not. Untill that person has realize and is truely completely back as before.. such that the way you loved and expect it turns out to be simply that way
Anonymous
September 16th, 2016 12:45pm
it is not a bad thing to stay in love with someone who left you because they have made a huge impact good or bad on your life but at some point you have to move on to become a happier version of yourself as the person left you
TheTripleS719
September 17th, 2016 4:25am
Not at all. Just because they left doesn't mean your feelings went with them. Give it time, be patient; you'll move on before you know it.
SmilingMeow
September 17th, 2016 9:07am
Depends on the scenarios. But its not a bad thing to love some one who left you may you should see things from their point of view and see what you did wrong try to correct it say sorry try to bring them back you will feel much better forgetting some policy for a loved one is not a bad thing Be happy
GottafallBeforeyouFLY
September 18th, 2016 7:00am
No, it's not bad at all!! It's common, especially depending on how long you've been together. And if you both were committed to the relationship.
Anonymous
September 21st, 2016 7:17pm
As long as it hurt you - and I can imagine that it hurts - yes, it is a bad thing, 'cause it will make you start to feel bad about yourself.
2cupsofteaa
September 23rd, 2016 9:10pm
There is no right or wrong in love- unless that person is mistreating you in some verbal and physical way. Your question really depends on the situation. No, it is not bad to love someone who left you because you need some time to mourn and move on. Yes, it's bad to stay in love with someone who cheated on you, and then left you. Either ways, use your own judgement and gut feeling.
SunnyQ
September 24th, 2016 12:13pm
It's your choice to love someone.. But is worth to love someone who left? Isn't it better to 'open' your heart for someone who love you and stay with you.
heavenButton79
September 25th, 2016 7:19pm
no it's never a bad thing to have feelings and expecially if this person was your first love or stole your heart
Anonymous
September 28th, 2016 12:42am
That's a difficult situation. Love naturally comes and goes, however the best thing you could do is develop a better relationship with yourself, and go from there.
BeyondEmpathy
September 28th, 2016 12:14pm
Love is a very unique emotion that is totally individual. How it feels for you may not for another. But how you feel IS how you feel. Whether this is good or bad depends on how you feel about it. Do you feel like its becoming upsetting or preoccupying? If so maybe talking to a listener could be helpful?
amandaleonard
September 30th, 2016 1:20am
It's not necessarily "bad" but it can lead to overwhelming thoughts and prevent oneself from moving on from the relationship. If the relationship has ended, a person should take actions towards moving on from that relationship.
Anonymous
October 9th, 2016 6:48am
Not at all. You had a relationship with that person & you had feelings for them, its normal to feel this way & it will pass.
Anonymous
October 9th, 2016 8:55am
No. But, you have to realize that while you may have loved or still love them, they hurt you. Know that you are better than that, and you don't need them to find the right path.
mysteriousHeart66
October 13th, 2016 1:01am
This may be bad if you are trying to love someone else because you will most likely compare the two people
thehermitelf
October 13th, 2016 9:04pm
It is not. It's not like you can just tell yourself to stop loving someone as soon as possible. As some point, everybody will go through this. As long as it does not affect you in any way that hinders your personal growth and everyday life then I'd say it's quite cool.
ofHopesandDreams
October 16th, 2016 1:40am
It is not a bad thing, we are bound to have a little to not control on our feelings, but at the same time, we have to work on moving on from the love and have a new start.
CaressingYourSoul92
October 17th, 2016 4:22pm
It is a bad thing if it keeps you from living a healthy life, meaning if it gets in the way of your daily activities, if on the other hand, you love this person and you do not harbor a grudge, then, how can anyone say that love is a bad thing? Loving and wishing good to someone who hurt you is a prove of unconditional love...
Shaw2listen
October 19th, 2016 2:09pm
No, but letting go does get easier with time. Take the breakup at your own pace, how you feel is how you feel and can never be wrong.
Shannon1999
October 19th, 2016 7:02pm
No this is not a bad thing at all. You're not going to just fall out of love with someone with a click of the fingers, it takes time to get over these things, some more than others. So take your time and take everyday as it comes.
Anonymous
October 19th, 2016 8:31pm
Depending on the reasons why the relationship is now over, no. Someone who you felt intimate with and has left you, it is completely normal to still have feelings for.
intern
October 22nd, 2016 3:19am
Not bad at all its to show them you still care when everything is gone you still wanna be there and fight to love them
cosyheart21
October 22nd, 2016 7:58am
It's not a bad thing, but it isn't positive either. It's natural to miss and have strong feelings for someone you've had a relationship with. However, as hard as it is, if someone was stupid enough to leave you, you have to be smart enough to let them go. You deserve to be someone who wants to be with you, and someone who will love and respect you. Moving on can be hard, but it's important to remember that when a door closes, another opens. Stay strong, and have faith in what is to come.
Anonymous
October 27th, 2016 4:56pm
i mean its not our fault to stay madly and badly in love with that person who left you. its hard to just move on and let go. it takes time.
Anonymous
October 28th, 2016 2:08pm
no not necessarily,but you have to move on with your life. if they dont love you back,they arent worth it. try and find someone else that does love you back and see where the relationship goes
xAmethiax
November 4th, 2016 4:49pm
Having feelings and even being in love is ok. Afterall to love is never a bad thing as long as you are able to be happy.