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is it a bad thing to stay in love with someone who left you?

310 Answers
Last Updated: 11/08/2021 at 8:02pm
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Top Rated Answers
TherapistMamaLeo
July 12th, 2018 4:55am
It depends on how much you two loved each other or how much you loved them. But after you had enough time to not get passed them but to find another person, you have moved on. And thats all that matters at the time.
Anonymous
July 12th, 2018 5:58am
No it isn’t, because we can’t say no to our feelings or control them suddenly..but we can do everything to make these feelings disappear or to be less
Pasteia
July 14th, 2018 7:20am
Everyone needs time to mourn loss; which believe it or not a break up is. This person has most likely been a huge part of your life when you were together and now they're suddenly not. It takes time for your body to process what happened and it's important to let yourself do that too. For some it might take only a week and for others it can take years. Don't be afraid to feel a certain way, there's a reason you are.
blueHuman6457
November 6th, 2019 4:13am
It depends. Did the other person move on or do they just need a break? If someone leaves you, they are unhappy with your behaviour. If you can convince them things will be different this time around, they might come back. I would say if you don't want to apologize don't bother. If you do, it might work and it might not. You will have to decide if you want the relationship back and if it's worth it or not. If you think that's the case, you will have to take a big risk with no guarantees. Sitting around waiting is a waste of your time. Try to get them back or move on yourself.
braveSea72
March 21st, 2019 3:20am
Now, I wouldn't say that it's bad. If I told a member that it was bad to feel this way, that would be counterproductive. They might think that they are a failure for not being able to move on. However, I'm not encouraging staying in love with someone that left you. It does no good to be stuck on someone for way too long and miss other opportunities that may arise. What I'm trying to say is that it's normal. Validate their feelings but remind the member that doing this won't bring back the loved one. Ask forward-looking questions, rather than focusing on their ex.
iamtabs
March 23rd, 2019 2:23am
It is completely normal to stay in love with someone who has left you. It shows that you still care for that significant other. I have recently went through a breakup and I still love her and there is nothing wrong with that. It means that I still care for her and I will always be there for her. Love is never ever wrong, it is a true gift to have the opportunity to love someone that has been there for you and who has been a big part of your life. So to answer your question again. No, it is not a bad thing to stay in love with someone who has left you.
SunsetAtMidnight01
April 18th, 2019 5:57pm
Not at all, it simply means that you still care for them even though they decided not to care for you anymore. That is nothing to be ashamed of, at all, and you should always treasure feelings like that. And besides, knowing that you still care just makes you a better person over all. To be in love does not always mean being in a relationship. It usually means finding someone you care about, and want to get to know more than you already do. So no, it is definitely not a bad thing to stay in love with someone who left you. Just be sure it doesn't hurt yourself in the process :)
Anonymous
April 20th, 2019 1:08am
Loving someone is never a bad thing. Loving someone is your choice, being loved by them is their choice. If you truly love someone, you won't get hurt even if the person doesn't love you back. It doesn't matter whether the person is with you or not. People don't get hurt because of love, people get hurt because of expectations. Sometimes we get lost in this materialistic world and we forget the beauty of this world. Sometimes we forget how to love and we start complaining when things don't go the way we want. We always have a choice.
OriginalBubbles93
May 24th, 2019 8:12am
It honestly isn't a bad thing at all! Love is a complex human emotion. Rejection is a societal stigma. Allowing yourself to love someone even after they've left you speaks very highly about your attitude towards love and towards your ability to manage your emotions. Remember, however, that you can stay in love with someone who left you. But it is harassment if you cross the line and try to contact them after they've explicitly "left you". Allow yourself to embrace the complexity of love rather than run away from it. Give yourself the freedom to know what it feels like to love unconditionally without expecting anything back in return.
Anonymous
June 15th, 2019 5:13pm
Absolutely not!! It is completely normal for someone to still love a person whom had left them. Although it is not the most convenient at all times, its still completely normal and I would not worry too much about it if I was you. You'll forget about them soon enough, but until then you should talk time to treat yourself!! You deserve it!! If they left you then they probably don't see how great you are and you deserve much better!! I hope the next person you get with teats you like Royalty. Wish you the best and have a wonderful day!!
lexmc
July 4th, 2019 9:13am
Generally, not, unless they are unhealthy for you and this feeling is affecting your way of living negatively. Keep the people that support and encourage you, for your best self, around. It's ok to be in love still, but if they are not ready for you, give them time to see what they have been missing and give yourself time to manage these emotions you may be feeling. Unfortunately, it may not be destined to be for you two to stay together, but that's an opportunity for you to find the one that will make and have you happy.
Anonymous
August 16th, 2019 1:58pm
It can have a negative affect on your mental health definitely. Rarely it's a good idea to live in the past. Nothing will ever be the same forever, which can be both a good or bad thing, if you want to relieve memories with someone you used to be with. I've struggled a lot with missing some i really enjoyed spending time with, which had a negative on my mental health. It is very understandable that healing takes time, and it should, but for too long for your own good. Whenever one door closes, another one opens. If you stay staring at the closed door, you won't be able to see the new door and opportunity that's opened!
Anonymous
August 18th, 2019 6:36pm
Love is an attribute we are enjoined to possess as humans and people's behavior towards is should not deter us from doing what is right or being the best person we can be. We own, as humans, the rights to our emotions and actions and therefore give no one the right, to make us into who we are not. The person left you but that does not change what you feel for the person or who you are. Only time can tell how long the love will remain still. So, staying in love with a person who left you is not a bad thing.
ApolloGoddess
September 13th, 2019 12:38am
Yes, it’s not healthy. They made their decision. But that doesn’t mean that their decision defines you. And it doesn’t mean no one else can love you. You are your own person who is going through your own life. You just haven’t met the one who will love you forever yet. The person who left you does not define you. They do not get to decide how you will go though your life. You have to let them go. You will love again. You will continue to live. It just may hurt for a while. But put a smile on your face and keep pushing forward
zaatarHoney
September 13th, 2019 5:47pm
I think “bad” is a harsh word to use, and entirely subjective. I would say- it’s a natural thing to still have feelings for someone you love even if they left you. I would say, in their absence, that love could spill into resentment or heartache, and other negative emotions, depending on your specific circumstance and personality style. ♡ Breakups with someone you love are never easy for anyone who can feel emotion. What you’re feeling is natural and it’s okay to acknowledge how you feel and sit with it a while. Breakups are a different kind of loss, there is a grieving process just the same. Reach out for support when you need it, we all do at one point or another. ♡ Best wishes love.
Anonymous
September 15th, 2019 8:23am
No. it's not like you can dictate your feelings and tell to it to stop loving that someone. Although you have a full control of your emotions and feelings. but whatever you are feeling at the moment, let it be. The more you resist the more it will persists. don't go against your feelings.
queenofakind
September 18th, 2019 6:04pm
It is totally okay to feel like you still love someone who left you. Emotions as intense as love, betrayal, and heartbreak are often difficult to let go of, and you are going to need some time to process through the breakup. As much as it may feel like the pain is never going to end, I promise that it will. As you heal, you will begin to let go of the attachment to that person and you will find that your feelings will begin to fade gradually. It's okay to feel like you still love your ex right now, but just know that that won't last forever. Better days are on the horizon :)
Anonymous
October 2nd, 2019 6:37pm
Love is a feeling that is not easily turned off. I don't think good or bad is the question because feelings are what they are. It is essential to protect and nurture oneself, regardless of who is in our lives. People can leave for many reasons, and it may be a positive reason and a positive outcome even when the situation is painful. The ability to love is precious, and we humans would not be the same without this ability. As painful as it is to have people move out of our lives, we gain wisdom and insight from the event to help us in the future.
Anonymous
October 17th, 2019 8:23pm
I would have to say that it is bad but also not. First, it is a bad thing to stay in love with someone who has left you because you may still feel that you guys need to be together but the other no longer wants to be with you. This can mess up your emotions and can be unhealthy for you to be continued feeling sad or mad that you guys are no longer together. On the other hand it can be a good thing to still feel emotions for someone who has left you because it can be more worse and heart breaking to just leave off on bad terms. Instead you guys can make a healthy good idea and agree that you guys need to move on but still would love to be friends. By doing this it allows you not to feel down or horrible that you two are no longer together as a couple but still have respect as friends.
Anonymous
October 18th, 2019 2:18am
My answer is no. I think it is perfectly normal and okay to still love someone who left you. In fact, I think it’s normal to love someone who you leave. It’s going to be hard, I know that for a fact, but I promise you that eventually, you’ll look back on this and realize it was good for you because they shouldn’t be thinking about leaving you. It’s probably also hard for them, too. Just remember, you’re never alone and there’s always someone to talk to. You’ll get through this, I promise. I hope you feel better :)
haphapz
October 18th, 2019 6:21am
i don't think it's a bad thing to stay in love with someone who've left you! especially if this person left really suddenly. after all love is a feeling and human nature. it's just unhealthy to ourselves to hold onto to someone who've left you, knowing that they'll never come back to us again. you have to consider about your own well-being as well and try to meet new people and perhaps love someone who shares the same feeling as you! when that time comes, you'd realise this will be so much better for your mental health. all the best! please engage a listener when needed.
Anonymous
April 12th, 2020 6:04am
It is not a bad thing if it does not affect your present or future. But most of the times that is a sign you should move on and find new love. It is the time to learn to let go of that love, relationship and move on, with someone who will appreciate and love you. As long as you'll be stuck in the past emotionally, you won't be able to find the future. Easier said than done, because letting go of someone you care about is definitely the most difficult thing to do. If the person left you, it's best to learn to let go and move on.
jess9726
April 1st, 2020 2:18am
Absolutely not! Love is a very complicated feeling that can leave us confused at times. Love is also a very powerful feeling that can make us feel like we are on cloud nine or down in the dumps. It is not bad to have genuine feelings for a person, even if they are no longer in your life. Over time, sometimes, we fall out of love with people, and sometimes we will go on loving that person for the rest of our life. Time will heal you, you are not wrong to feel how you feel, even if the person has been gone for a long time.
nicholsd
April 2nd, 2020 5:34am
Good Evening, I understand how it feels to be in love. Love sometimes is very confusing. I remember when my ex girlfriend left me a few years ago and I asked myself the same thing. What I had to learn is that if she didn’t see me for the positive characteristics I have, she doesn’t deserve to have me stress and weep over here. Love is something that you don’t get over easy. However, the lesson I learned was never let love lead you down a path that makes you feeling empty or cause yourself to blame yourself for them leaving you.
Anonymous
April 2nd, 2020 9:18pm
I think that love cannot be controlled many times. therefore it is not wrong to continue feeling love, as long as you do not let the person hurt you. You do not control continuing to feel love, but by working on your self-love you can slowly come out of that infatuation that is hurting you. If the person left you and you still suffer because of it, it is better that you find a way to forget, forgive and let go. You are worth a lot, remember it. Remember that you do not deserve that people mistreat you. Would you let a friend get hurt? treat yourself as you would treat those you love the most.
ImHereForYou365
April 11th, 2020 1:07pm
To be in love with someone that left you is not something you have to feel bad and upset about, everyone may feel the same in some time of their life. People come and people go in our lives and we can’t do anything about it. You just have to remind yourself who you are and that they don’t deserve your love if they leave you. You are great and kind and have so much to give but you have to find the right person that will make the same effort as you. YOU DONT NEED THEM, you need yourself. If you want to get over it go out with your friends , have fun or spend time with your family, because those are the people that truly love you.
Anonymous
April 17th, 2020 3:57am
You probably already know the answer to this question but you are hesitant about acting it out. If they have permanently left you, there is no reason to drag it out - the relationship has ended for more than one reason. It will only increase your hurt if anything happened between the two of you and you are losing out on the potential of a much better relationship. Say that there is a big possibility of them returning, (is there) why did they leave in the first place when they did not think of to stay with you for a long time?
Emma4660
April 22nd, 2020 11:38pm
It's never a bad thing to identify and feel your emotions. Even if your loved one is no longer physically in your everyday life, you can still feel a connection to that person. Feeling in love still could just indicate that you had really meaningful relationship, or maybe you are in love with the "idea" of that person, or the memories you've shared, or how they made you feel. I think it is important to appreciate what they meant to you and move on when you are ready. Breaking up is so hard to do- you might have leaned heavily on this person for support-but just know that you are just as strong on your own too!
Anonymous
March 25th, 2020 1:23am
It is completely normal to stay in love with someone who left you. After all you were with this person for a reason. The important thing is to take care of yourself and love yourself. You should allow yourself the chance to move on and heal. It will not be easy at first but time will slowly heal the wounds until you are ready to try again with someone new, if that is what you desire. During this time remember your value and be patient with yourself. Also, do not forget to contact someone if you need to talk.
WordsAndTravels
April 16th, 2020 9:43am
Staying in love is a choice. I have always loved the same person for more than 10 years now. It was not a perfect relationship. We had to go through all the twists and turns to be where we are right now. For me, if a person leaves you- it is their choice and your response to their action is your choice. Would you let go of that person and continue living or will you hold on to the thought that maybe, just maybe that person might come back. If I wwre to ask- we all must know our worth, we are worth more than that. I hope people find strength to keep going on despite of the circumstances. Someone is writing the perfect love story for you. If its not yet rainbow and butterflies, then its not yet the end.