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Is it normal for my current boyfriend to always hangout and be with my ex boyfriend?

19 Answers
Last Updated: 06/30/2020 at 6:30pm
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Caroline Middelsdorf, MSc.


I am a warm hearted, patient, calm and open-minded therapist. I am here to dedicate my expertises to my clients and their individual challenges, thoughts and feelings.

Top Rated Answers
June 5th, 2017 3:30pm
Normal? Uh, no. A problem? Well, maybe, maybe not. Best place to start is with yourself. How do you feel about this? Does it cause upset, anger, confusion? Does it negatively affect your current relationship? You are the common link here, best to figure out where you stand first. :-)
October 14th, 2015 6:51pm
Now that you mention it, my boyfriend at the time (someone I still deal with-complicated) claimed to not like my ex boyfriend(someone I haven't seen or heard from since the breakup years ago) . Actually they both claimed not to like each other and one day my boyfriend called me on his phone because at the time he didn't have a way to get in touch with me. I was confused because to my understanding they didn't like each other. . They acted like they hated each other and I will never know why. Maybe he was just being nice to him anyway, Enough about me. I find it rather odd for your current boyfriend to be associating with your ex boyfriend period. I would be very cautious and I wouldn't trust it. There is no telling what they could be talking about in regards to you. Be careful.
April 27th, 2015 10:03pm
I've never tried to pick and choose any of my partners friends. It could be that your current boyfriend feels close to your ex because they have you in common. If your current boyfriend is mature enough to see you for how you treat him and what then two of you have, and there is a strong mutual trust, then the ex shouldn't be an issue. I wouldn't necessarily say that it's abnormal, but personally I would be careful because things could get stirred up later if the relationship starts to deteriorate.
June 14th, 2015 10:33pm
I would't say it's normal, but obscure. In some cases they are probably getting information about you more than anyhthing and to do that they get the number 1 source.
June 5th, 2018 1:18am
No, I do not think it's appropriate for a current boyfriend to hang out with your ex because it would be hard to move forward.
January 29th, 2018 5:33pm
Maybe he does not mean anything to him but if you feel awkward with it. Then it would be good to talk to him about it. Using "I feel that..." or "It makes me feel... because..."
April 13th, 2015 3:37pm
It's not normal, no, but at least they get along and he doesn't seem to have any bad feelings towards your ex.
September 27th, 2016 9:35am
As long as your ex-boyfriend (if he ever talks about you) talks about you respectfully, and as long as your current boyfriend dismisses anything negative your ex says, there really is no problem. It can be a little awkward if the three of you hang out together, but if everyone is respectful then it is a sign of a healthy relationship and a healthy breakup.
January 15th, 2015 1:47am
It may be normal if they are friends before you and your current boyfriend are together. If not, I think its rather healthy that this happens because usually current and ex partners don't get along well. It's kinda hard because it creates a limited space for you, if you're with your ex he gets mad but with your situations it may not likely to happen. Maybe he's trying to know about you more from your ex :)
September 22nd, 2015 9:27am
Probably not usual, but not abnormal. If they like each other. As long as they both talk about and treat you with respect. Otherwise neither of them is worthy of concern. Perhaps they have something good in common. YOU!
June 28th, 2016 6:20pm
It's weird but not entirely abnormal, if you feel uncomfortable you could talk to your boyfriend and let him know that you feel this way.
January 14th, 2015 11:20am
i think it's healthy for you or your boyfriend to hang out with other people on a regular basis. but it isn't healthy for you to always be exposed to such a social situation if your last relationship ended on bad terms.
May 8th, 2015 2:06am
I don't think there really is a 'normal' when it comes to relationships! I guess what's more important is how you all feel about this. If you're cool with it and there's no tension in the air, then I guess all is well! However, if you're feeling unsettled by it for whatever reason, then maybe have a chat to your boyfriend about it and let him know how you feel?
June 18th, 2015 6:12am
It depends upon ur situation with ur ex and how long have the 2 men in ur life known each othr.. but a healthy frndship does no harm
July 13th, 2015 3:50am
It's 50/50% normal. It can be good or bad. They can just be friends and try to get along for your sake or they can be to boys whom are talking about what has and what had happened in both the relationships. So it's sort of normal
July 27th, 2015 6:28pm
"Normal is just a setting on the washing machine at our house" - thanks for that grandma. It's a cliche statement that points to the fact that everyone's normal is different. Only you and your boyfriend can decide what's normal for you. Maybe it's time to connect with a listener to talk about what normal looks like to you, in this particular relationship. It's good that you are here and asking questions. You are in the right place to be understood.
December 8th, 2015 11:59pm
It depends of the situation. But if they are good friends and you are on good terms with your ex boyfriend then it can be normal.
August 2nd, 2016 6:13am
I wouldn't call it abnormal but it certainly isn't the trend. Reading more into the situation however might be detrimental. However, if you've got concerns, it's never a bad idea to discuss things constructively. Good luck.
June 30th, 2020 6:30pm
Well the question is do you feel comfortable with it? I mean regardless of whether it is normal or not it depends on you if you want your boyfriend to be best friends with your ex. The truth is do a lot of guys do it? No, but if you feel like you do want your boyfriend to have that type of relationship with your ex. then talk to him about it. The best way to find out what is going on and the best way to move forward about it is to have an adult conversation about it. If you dont it might negatively affect your relationship