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Is it normal to still want to be in a relationship with someone after they break your heart?

44 Answers
Last Updated: 02/15/2022 at 2:06pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Tracy-Kate Teleke, PsyD, M.A., LMFT

Marriage & Family Therapist

I assist adults and couples in CA experiencing relationship challenges and interpersonal struggles including anxiety, depression, and a myriad of other life challenges.

Top Rated Answers
JustCallMeAce
August 31st, 2015 11:58pm
Yes, if you have poured lots of time and effort into the relationship you'll still want to be with them after they've broken your heart, you'll get over it one day, just have to wait on it
Anonymous
December 4th, 2017 1:28am
Yes, it's normal at times. The other party broke up doesn't mean that you are done with the love that you have for the other party. Until someone realize, until someone feels that she/he over it, the love can be still there and would want to be with the same person. It's normal.
justIzzie
December 6th, 2016 4:56pm
For a while after a break up, I believe it is normal. Emotions do not just disappear overnight, despite any actions that your significant other might have done. Especially if the relationship was long term, it will be harder to rid yourself of all emotion. However, you must always have faith that in the near future, when you mind is ready to let go, you will be able to move on and you have to remember that you are never alone in this journey.
Letiza
February 6th, 2018 2:48am
Of course coz they leave a part in your heart that will always be there forever after all you shared good memories with him/her nothing wrong about that if you're still both single and loved each other might as well give it a shot again
amazingamethyst
January 10th, 2022 11:23pm
Yes, each person has a different reality and what a different normal looks like. I can not offer advice if you should get back into the relationship, but just remember to cherish the time you had with one another. It is important to remember the good parts, rather than fixate on the bad. A broken heart can heal with time and a different mindset. Please remember to be gentle with yourself and know you have a community here at 7 cups to help and support you!! We all are here to listen and help you in anyway possible. There are so many resources at 7 cups which you can use a form of care for yourself.
Anonymous
July 7th, 2015 2:41am
It's very very normal I went through this as well. Feelings are always valid even if you think they may not be. Many people understand it
Zebrasarcastic
June 7th, 2016 9:52pm
That person said the right things and did the right things before breaking you're heart that's why you're hearts stuck to it
Anonymous
February 15th, 2022 2:06pm
Normal is always subjective. When people break your heart, whatever happened in the past. It's normal to think back and relieve the amazing moments. Any moments that weren't right for you or even a big issue for you slowly seem to fade. If it was out of the blue it may even be harder because you don't have those negative thoughts. However it's normal to feel bad or sad or whatever you are feeling right now after a break up. But I believe people always break up for a reason. And if this happened than it probably is for the better, even if it doesn't seem like that right now.
Anonymous
November 10th, 2020 4:45am
It depends. If you truly believe they have changed then you should do what is right. You need to know this person. You need to know whether they will break your heart again. If they will then it will not be worth it. Some people change. Some do not. Some people become jerks. Some do not. I am not you so and I can not decide. You will do what is best for you. Do not feel guilty if you reject them. You have every reason to. You and your heart need to agree together. You will be strong. I know it.
annaox25
August 14th, 2018 4:57am
This is a totally normal thing. Feeings don’t vanish after just a few days, weeks, months or even years. Sometimes they never go away.
MrDoctorMan
May 14th, 2018 8:53pm
Yes, you probably felt validated while in the relationship because maybe you had a strong connection, however once that connection is suddenly lost, you yourself will begin to feel empty without them. However do not get discouraged, you can move past this with the right support and on with your wonderful life!
AKelly
January 30th, 2018 8:07am
Yes, it is 100% normal. When you have a strong connection with someone, letting go isn't easy. It seems as though it's easier to forgive, than to throw it all away.
brightWaterfall75
July 26th, 2016 7:40pm
I think it's extremely common to still want to be with someone that broke our hearts, sometimes attachment and love don't come from the same place and it's worth checking if we are still attached to someone just because they've hurt in the same way other hurt us in the past. Sometimes where are attached to the familiar and new emotions can be scary. Give it time, and stay hopeful.
Anonymous
April 26th, 2016 7:25pm
Yes, it's normal. It's completely normal. You don't really choose who you love and want to be in a relationship with. What you can choose is whether you'll forgive, and whether you'll stay. And honestly, only you can make that choice.