Is it still worth trying if he/she broke up with me several times?

181 Answers
Last Updated: 08/15/2019 at 9:10pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Alex DS Ellis, MA, LMFT

Marriage & Family Therapist

Feeling depressed or anxious can be so overwhelming. I want to help you feel better and be able to enjoy life. You are not alone and you deserve emotional support.

Top Rated Answers
April 5th, 2018 2:30am
If the relationship ended several times and it still didn't work out then that's saying that something is wrong. If you yourself still want to pursue he/she then go for it! But remember what happened previously.
April 8th, 2018 7:33am
If that person broke up with you several times, it really means they don't have any interest in getting back with you. You shouldn't be chasing after them again and again after-all, they don't want to be in a relationship anymore so why spend precious time of your life chasing after them for something that isn't going to happen.
April 11th, 2018 8:05pm
If it is a negative experience for you, I believe it is not. But you are the best judge of you. You know you better and you know that person better and you know the situation better. Follow your heart and a path of positivity.
April 12th, 2018 3:52am
If the things get better once you get back together, it's fine. Because that means you're improving your relationship and you are making good changes. If things are still the same and you are having the same problems for the ones you broke up, then it's not a healthy relationship because you are doing the same things and just hoping not to break up.
April 12th, 2018 9:21pm
With a relationship that is on and off on several occasions, it would be best to discern why this keeps happening. Are they the same reasons? Are problems not being fixed? Also, trying to understand why your partner is doing this rather than working things out is a key. Are they insecure and afraid? Are they using this as a scare tactic to get out of trouble with you? These things can only be answered by you and should be examined before you make a choice. Remember, if you aren't sure because you have many feelings, ask yourself "If my best friend was in this situation, what would I tell them?"
April 13th, 2018 4:56pm
Honestly no because if the person has already broken your heart one to many times they are going to keep doing it...
April 15th, 2018 6:04pm
No. Clearly there is something lacking between you two, something that isn't clicking or you just have different personalities
April 18th, 2018 11:41pm
I've broken up with people several times before. I did it because I was confused about my feelings and didn't feel that the other person did enough to keep me which made me feel unwanted almost. If you want to keep the relationship going then you need to ask what the reason is for the multiple break ups, try to be completely honest about your feelings and what could possibly be going wrong. Just remember to respect yourself and try and get a realistic view on it, sometimes it's better to rip the band-aid off, let go and move on to save yourself from a prolonged struggle. Most importantly, I guess it all depends on the individual case and it's up to you 100% to decide what you do next.
April 19th, 2018 2:37am
I would ask myself if it's always the same reason? I think that's a think to consider. It depends really. You know best. Maybe you can talk about it with a listener to make you feel more clear about the situation.
April 24th, 2018 8:15pm
In my opinion it isn't but that's a decision you'll have to make on your own. Do you really want to put yourself through that again?
April 25th, 2018 5:46pm
this is what i myself am going through and its suckssss but what i did was i talked to him like a deep conversation stating what we want outta the relationship if it will be different. and just went from there
April 29th, 2018 6:39am
Depends on what reasons you guys had for the breakup. If it was an on off dating kind of thing get closure from her and ask yourself if you love her enough to try one more time. If you don't think your feelings are strong or if your reasons for break ups were quite bad, I suggest moving on.
May 7th, 2018 12:11pm
It is not easy. Sometimes You can't even do anything. You just have to work on yourself. Don't take any quick decision. With time you'll find a better answer.
May 10th, 2018 2:29am
It has been my experience with on/off again relationships that they're never really going to be stable. The broken nature of the relationship is often because one or more of the people involved aren't invested in the relationship. Why keep going back to someone you know is going to keep breaking your heart?
May 12th, 2018 8:13am
Depending on how it ended each time. Whether it was ugly or relatively mutual. Maybe if it has happened several times, it may be best to try and see how life without them would be
May 20th, 2018 12:24am
Probably not. As much as you may hate it, you can't force someone to love you. Just know that there are plenty of people out there that will love you as much as you love them. Don't waste your time waiting for something that will never happen. You deserve to be happy.
June 20th, 2018 2:48am
Every situation is different and I.T is important to look at the reasons why this consistently happens. I can't imagine that the relationship is super healthy if the break ups are consistent. I.T may be best to give yourself some space and listen to your gut.
June 21st, 2018 4:15am
In my opinion, it is not worth trying. The fact that they broke up with you several times is proof enough that they do not appreciate you and take you for granted, and chances of them breaking up with you again are high.
June 24th, 2018 1:29pm
it is good to give our loved ones 2 or 3 chances because they deserve this. but giving them more than that is like allowing them to commit mistake again and again. we need some sort of restrictions and control to be on the right path, if we get all the freedom there is a great chance that we will go or let them go on the wrong path... like a lot of love and care along with fulfilling all the needs and demands of a child in spite of right or wrong.. we end up spoiling the child.. we should only allow for the goods and stop the bad so we should not overdo anything .. we are humans and we commit mistakes but repeating the mistake is not a good thing..
June 27th, 2018 5:56am
First of all, to know if it worth trying or not, well try to remember what are some of the reasons used for breakups? In my opinion, if the breakups often happen between you two for the silliest reason 😂 then you might consider to put a full stop there.
June 27th, 2018 3:45pm
A good place to start when this question arises is to ask "why did he/she break up with me so many times?". Both people usually contribute to conflict in a relationship but sometimes the other person is just not in the right mindset to be able to love us the way we deserve to be loved. If you find that you were the main reason for the break up, focus on fixing those aspects before you try to make the relationship work. However if his/her reasons for the break up are related to them alone and it is not within your control, perhaps it is best to be thankful for the good times but to ultimately let go of them. Do what is best for your heart, and stay true to the needs of your soul. I wish you all the best xx
June 27th, 2018 4:48pm
It really depends on the person's true self.. if u really love his character and agree people make mistakes then go again
June 30th, 2018 2:18am
No. You deserve better and shouldn't keep going through that. They obviously don't appreciate you. You will find someone much better ^^
June 30th, 2018 4:02am
I'm going to be very bias here and very "me" and maybe even ubprofessional... but no! It is not worth trying again. Beside my own experiences, there have been hundreds of other relationships that struggles and struggle simply because there is an ignoring of what really needs to be done that would be absolutely best for both people involved. Yes, it feels romantic that whole "try and try and try again" but think about what everything is actually telling you. What your PARTNER is telling you. Believe them when they say they "don't know anymore" or anything that indicates they're not really there for you anymore. You know what's romantic? Ease. Happiness. Togetherness. Being on the same wavelength. Etc. And, yes... it is absolutely exists outside of the relationship you're in right now as hard as may be to fathom. Give your effort to someone who wants it... and who wants to give it to you, too.
July 4th, 2018 8:37pm
Sometimes it is just better to walk away than face continual heartache! If it is meant to be they wouldn't have left you in the first place. Some people aren't ready to be in a serious relationship despite their feelings.
July 10th, 2018 2:30pm
Relationships are a two way street, meaning both people have to want it. You might love him/her, but they need to feel the same way... Try letting go for a while, see if your ex comes back to you on his/her own. You will get your answer...
July 13th, 2018 10:05pm
It depends on what you feel. Do you love this person? Or were you dating just to date? Do you believe there is a possible future?
July 14th, 2018 10:24am
There is a limit for everything, If he/she doesn't respect you now will be for the future. Next time it happens walk away.
July 21st, 2018 1:30am
Breaking up is hard process but when the same person is breaking up with you and you going back to the same thing, i think and own experience has taught me that you have to take moment and say is this worthed cause your heart gets broken by the same person and you not able to let go. It will make you depressed and feeling you have done something wrong.
July 26th, 2018 2:03pm
Ask yourself if they respect you or not and if you trust them or not. A healthy relationship has both respect and trust. This is the answer to "is it still worth it". If both are yes then it is, if not then decide on what is the best to do.