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My boyfriend or girlfriend wants to break up with me, how can I change their mind?

348 Answers
Last Updated: 05/04/2020 at 8:54pm
My boyfriend or girlfriend wants to break up with me, how can I change their mind?
★ This question about Breakups was starred by a moderator on 5/12/2016.
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Top Rated Answers
ThomasF
December 19th, 2015 5:25am
Find out what's bugging them. If they've indicated a desire to break up with you but haven't already done it, that signifies that they still see hope in the relationship. If you can't work through it together, give them some time away from you. Let them miss you. Absence quite often can make the heart grow fonder.
superman02
December 19th, 2015 6:41am
Sometimes it isn't the best option to change there mind, as hard as that is to believe we must remember that all people are entitled to their own opinions of what should happen. As people we must be able to accept and live with change it may not be the most popular answer but, you should really ask yourself before attempting to change their mind am I doing this for me or them.
charmingBeauty83
December 19th, 2015 1:14pm
Make them feel like your there to support any decision they make as long as there happy. They will see how much you care about how they feel .
Anonymous
December 19th, 2015 11:32pm
you can't. it's like no turning back if they made up their minds on breaking up with you, they could only pretend that they changed their mind but really,, would you want to be with the shell? if you guys are really meant for each other, you will be together again. if not, you are not.
RomanticJ
December 20th, 2015 3:45pm
If my boyfriend or girlfriend wants to break with me, I should find out the reason behind this. If it is a minor problem, we can talk about it and try to settle things down. However if the reason behind the break up is cheating or he/she has fallen in love with someone else, the situation is more complicated. Changing his/her mind will be useless. So in this case, I should let it go. But in all situations a dialogue is a must because whatever the outcome, we would have heard each others point of view.
sweetDew64
December 20th, 2015 5:55pm
You can remind them why they are with you. Do things they love or try new things to spice up your relationship
daisdais
December 23rd, 2015 3:57pm
What is the reason they want to break up with you? In some cases it can be better to break of a relationship. However if you sit down and talk with them you may be able to work something out. Relationships are ALL about communication! Talk to your boyfriend/girlfriend!!
Anonymous
December 23rd, 2015 8:33pm
You cannot change their minds. What you can change is your reaction to the situation. If you need an explanation as to why they wish to end the relationship, ask them kindly. It could be any reason, just make sure there is communication going on :) wish you the best.
Anonymous
December 23rd, 2015 11:43pm
Figure out what you've done wrong, maybe there is a way to patch up your relationship. Under some circumstances the relationship can be fixed. Always remember not to waste your energy on meaningless/toxic relationships.
siribear20
December 24th, 2015 4:16pm
talk to them why they want to break up with you. if its because of something you think you can change, then maybe you can give it another try.
Anonymous
December 25th, 2015 3:08am
If your boyfriend and girlfriend is willing to break up with you, they are obviously not the right one because you wouldn't need to change their mind.
Herequeerandcheering
December 25th, 2015 5:04am
Unfortunately you can't change their mind. It is their choice, you should not force them to do something they don't want to do. If they don't like you that way anymore it is better for them to leave you rather then to be with someone who doesn't feel the same way as you feel about them
Anonymous
December 25th, 2015 8:35am
When you get into a relationship with someone you make a commitment but also understand that there is a possibility that the person you are with could lose interest or have something come up in their life. If the person who is trying to leave has made their mind up p, you really can't change it as it isn't your own choice. You could confront them but that may not always work depending on the issue.
Anonymous
December 26th, 2015 2:48am
unfortunately you can't always look to change someone else's mind. sometimes people need space and time.
musicalTruth13
December 26th, 2015 10:52am
One can never change a persons mind, a persons mind is their own. But there are often things that we can do that may help them realize that it would not be for the best.
alwaysbelieve8
December 26th, 2015 8:17pm
You can change the situation by wise thinking but you can't change a person perspective if they are not ready to listen..be calm and if the relationship is important to them they won't take that step and if they still do ..Just let go bcoz you are saving yourself from worst and in future you will thank yourself for staying neutral. .take care
joyfulApple58
December 27th, 2015 12:06am
Don't. If they don't see that you truly love them, they are simply not worth your time and you love.
TheHelpfulNerd
December 27th, 2015 3:31am
They say if you love something, set it free. You don't want to hold them to anything. Don't force that person to be in a situation they don't want to be in. Ask them what the reason is for the breakup, and ask if there is anything you can do to change their mind. If they say there isn't anything you can do, then it's best if you leave them be. Don't make the decision for them.
goldfinch25
December 27th, 2015 4:45am
It's really their decision in the first place. They are the ones wanting to break up with you, not the other way around. Be supportive and be a good listener because they obviously have an issue with the current relationship or it could be an outside force. There are no guarantee ways to changing someone's mind in regards to this in particular, but just being there for them shows that at least you care.
generousTouch42
December 27th, 2015 6:41pm
You could try talking with your partner about how you have come a long way. Also ask a friend to help you out
greatfulPeace26
December 30th, 2015 12:22am
First think about yourself and what's best for you. Will this relationship make you happy? Is there any good reasons to break up? If being together is right the reasons will be clear. If this is a regular occurrence think, is your partner trying to make you work for them. Always think about yourself and your happiness first
Jess51361
December 30th, 2015 12:51am
im afraid you cannot change someones mind as they may not feel as you feel, but talk it through to seek out any problems
Anonymous
December 30th, 2015 4:17am
Well you could talk to them and tell them how you really feel about them. If they don't feel the same there really isn't a way you can make them stay because everything happens for a reason. so if they don't want you. you'll find something better in Life.
Anonymous
December 30th, 2015 6:01am
you cant, otherwise it comes across as selfish, if your bf or gf wants to breakup with you, doesnt mean you did something wrong or you have a flaw which they dont like, very often people start having negative talk and think there is something wrong with them or if their partner wants to break up, its our fault, but its not always true, sometimes in life, things doesnt work and sometimes relationships doesnt work out but it doesnt mean its anyone's fault, in the same way it was your independent decision to fall in love with your partner and give her/him all the happiness , your partner has the choice to be with you or not, it sounds selfish but its true,doesnt mean your partner think less of you, loving someone is not expecting love in return, loving someone means seeing your partner happy even if he/she doesnt wanna be with you if you love someone let him/her go, if that person comes back to you, that means he/she loves you and if doesnt, then it was never meant to be and there is nothing wrong with that
highopes
December 30th, 2015 11:46am
you can't you should simply try to move on because making them stay will just make you more sad because you can't force someone to love you
saltywhale
December 30th, 2015 3:07pm
no, you can't. Let them do what they want. you cannot change people mind that's the truth you have to admit it and move on.
Anonymous
December 30th, 2015 4:27pm
You won't and shouldn't try to influence someone else's decision. If this is the question being asked by yourself, you need to step back and gain some introspection on why this happened in the first place.
Anonymous
December 30th, 2015 6:25pm
Well I don't think that you should try and change their mind, I know it might be hard for you but you know what they say, "If you love someone let them go and if its meant to be they will come back"
FractalBunny
December 31st, 2015 2:01am
In the end, it might not be about changing their mind. If your significant other has a valid reason to break up with you, you should come to terms with it and learn from it.
Greatlistener87
December 31st, 2015 3:09am
There is always a reason behind breakups, always remember to find out the reason behind it and see whether you guys can work through it.