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Why am I so afraid to open up?

25 Answers
Last Updated: 05/04/2020 at 12:35am
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Danielle Gonzales, PsyD

Psychologist

Hello! My name is Dani, I am a Psychologist and registered Psych Assistant. I have a passion for helping a different types of clients from all diverse backgrounds!

Top Rated Answers
Jay22822
August 18th, 2015 4:12pm
Because you built a wall around yourself thinking that if you ever took that wall down that you'd get hurt. But at some point you have to open up and allow that wall to come down.
Anonymous
December 7th, 2015 8:57am
You are so afraid to open up because you have a feeling that people will judge you -which no one likes-. But we are here for you. To listen you without judging you as you are safe and have full privacy.
setmefreeletmebe
April 10th, 2015 6:17pm
Maybe you can't forget something from your past. Maybe something had touched you so much that you can't forget that and now you are afraid
Bcrystal818
May 2nd, 2015 3:42am
Some people are afraid to open up for fear of embarrassment but your thoughts do matter and should be heard.
ElvenLight
July 27th, 2015 10:43pm
One could be so afraid to open up and express their feelings due to perhaps learning to hide your feelings while growing up.
Aleespli21
September 7th, 2015 5:10am
Sometimes people are afraid to open up because of their past. They might of gotten hurt from people who they did open up to and then shut themselves down to others absentmindedly or on purpose. If it's not from something in the past, it could just as well be that you are afraid of getting hurt in general. Just understand that everyone faces this problem, but letting yourself be free and trusting that everything will be alright is key.
Cosmiclover01
December 29th, 2015 4:16pm
Opening up leaves a person vulnerable. Sometimes, sharing the way you feel, think or want to say is like pouring your heart out to someone. It can leave us with a whirlwind of emotions or worry about trust, etc.
richPresence27234
August 23rd, 2016 4:17am
Opening up is hard because you are letting people see the vulnerable side of your self so you don't want people to see the vulnerable side of you. A quote I like is "To share your weaknesses is to make yourself vulnerable to make yourself vulnerable is to show your strength"
bigDreamer94
May 30th, 2016 6:25pm
I have felt the same way. Trust can affect you not wanting to open up. Afraid to be hurt. Slowly little by little you can open up just take trust and patience from other person.
Baleighbugg
August 11th, 2015 6:17pm
Sometimes people are afraid to open up because they have been hurt before or they are worried of being judged. The best way to open up is to find someone you trust and let them know what is bothering you.
Tinygreentreefrog1234
September 22nd, 2015 1:52am
Maybe you are shy, afraid of judgment, maybe you have been hurt multiple times and are therefore afraid to be yourself.
Anonymous
September 19th, 2016 9:57am
Opening up can be scary. But to grow it is so important to share and put yourself out there. It's how you know if someone is the right friend, mentor, or partner for you.
Anonymous
December 21st, 2015 11:31pm
its normal to be shy and hidden, its only human, most people don't really like talking about them self or their problems to people, but its a good thing when we do talk about them, little weight lifted off your shoulders when you do talk about things going on, message me anytime!
lifeisBeautiful05
November 14th, 2017 6:26am
Maybe you don't trust the other person. Choose the right person and open up in front of them. Not everyone is worth it to share your feelings.
Greatlistener87
August 1st, 2016 7:45am
Probably because you are afraid to get hurt. Maybe because of being hurt in the past. The thing is you have to know whom to open up to. Don't just open up to anyone and trust must be earned not given.
cristiana33
October 19th, 2015 8:32pm
It may be possible you grew up having all the people around you telling you what to say and what to keep inside your mind. We all form patterns of communication and our insecurities come from those moments from our childhood most times as well. Try to identify what are the situations in which you feel you aren't feeling okay to open up & also what would make you feel more comfortable. Once you know these elements you can try finding someone who might help you, a good friend in which you trust. Some people tough are just more reserved... It's nothing wrong with that.
tinkerbella00
October 7th, 2015 2:00pm
i feel like that all the time so don't worry your not the only one, sometimes we don't like opening up because were either not comfortable with telling people or because were scared of what they'll think and worried we'll get judged. the best way to open up is with somebody who either gets what your going through or talking to someone who you know wont judge and who will help and support you through it, it can be anyone from a friend/ family member or even a teacher! hope you find this easier to understand, hope everything works out!;)
Raspberrycheesecake
June 5th, 2018 7:43am
Opening up can be a very scary thing. Opening up and saying something wrong - that’s now scary. However, the more you open up, the more you’ll feel happy and more comfortable.
lauralauralaura
February 14th, 2016 1:51am
Maybe try not to care about what they think or be afraid of them judging you. I've just started a relationship with someone who I met by chance and as I don't care about what they think of me, I don't feel like there's a barrier where I'm holding back my bad traits and the things which make me me. Also, they don't make me feel bad for my judgmental opinions, which is great haha. I think it also depends on the person who you are opening up to; if they're shy as well then it'll be more difficult. However, if you're afraid to open up to them, then maybe you should not bother talking with them.
luckmaster
May 31st, 2015 12:44pm
im pretty shy if you meet me in public even though im a writer a poet its easy being online and talk not many ppl can see the flaws you have in side if you stutter of have anxiety when you down or happy im more afraid talking to real person because even online I cut short in the conversation and sometime I feel like im a fool when I talk face to face sometttimes its just hard to open up showing the ppl the true you just because we are afraid to show our dif sides we have inside of us
soundofthesunshine
May 4th, 2020 12:35am
When we've experienced rejection or been hurt by others, we build layers of strength on top of our wounds for protection. In order to maintain that protection, we have to be conscious of how, when, and with who we open up to. But, over time, with the reassurance of the people you are trying to open up to, and the confidence in yourself, you won't be afraid of rejection and will be able to gradually open up the depths of your true self to others. Trust your gut and your heart to know if these are people you should open up to, and when the time is right to do so.
kaaylanichole1
November 16th, 2015 3:41pm
its normal to be shy and hidden, its only human, most people don't really like talking about them self or their problems to people, but its a good thing when we do talk about them, little weight lifted off your shoulders when you do talk about things going on, message me anytime!
CaressingYourSoul92
October 17th, 2016 5:08pm
It could be due to past experiences in which you opened yourself up and got hurt, however, we can't let the past define our present or future experiences because the same thing will never happen again in the exact same way, yes, you might get hurt again, however, it will not always be like this, so there is no reason for you to stop trying. Consider the experience of letting go of such fears, one step at a time, first try with close friends or relatives (who you might be already open with, just try to get even closer to them), then, start broadening the circle until you feel comfortable with the level of opennes achieved.
eeveeon
December 4th, 2017 8:20pm
Opening up is a step in recovery that can be hard to achieve. Opening up can mean becoming vulnerable (in a good way, of course), but nevertheless becoming an open book. It can be scary for someone to see how you truly feel, and what your mind thinks like.
SupportiveSockMonkey
April 24th, 2018 5:46pm
This could be because you are scared of others responses to what you want to talk about, it could also be because someone has reacted in a negative way before. Only you will know this answer and it will take someone you trust and feel comfortable around to open up about things your want to talk about.